The Owl House Page #2

Season #1 Episode #8: Once Upon a Swap

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[Her and Dottie walk through the employees only door. Eda tosses the cupcake aside.]

Eda:
Ha! Oh, being adorable is the life. [yawns] Time for a nap.

[She pulls out a pillow, pats it, and lays down. A shadow passes over as something meows. Eda opens her eyes with a gasp. She peeks over the edge of the crib, and Bowtie jumps up.]

Bowtie:
Leave this place!

Eda:
[gasps]

Bowtie:
[jumps into the crib and grabs Eda by the collar] Danger is near.

Roselle:
[through the door] Baby demon! We have a surprise for you!

Eda:
You hear that, Bowtie? [shoves him out of the crib]

Bowtie:
[grunts] Ow!

Eda:
There's a new star in town.

[The door opens.]

Bowtie:
[yowls and runs]

Roselle:
A gift for our new, cutest demon. [holds out a bee costume]

Eda:
Okay, I'm out. [crawls out of the crib and goes to the door] Novelty costumes are where I draw the line.

Roselle:
Dottie, please help our little angel get changed.

[Dottie shrieks and growls, hopping on various pieces of furniture in order to stop Eda.]

Roselle:
Oh, no, sweetie. You can't survive out there without us.

Eda:
Ladies, stand back. I am not above disrespecting my elders. [twirls her finger; sighs] Oh, dang. I'm not a witch right now.

Roselle:
No, baby. You're a cutie patootie. [reaches for Eda]

Eda:
[runs] Not today, sister!

Roselle:
No!

Dottie:
[shrieks]

[Eda runs through the employees only door. She closes it behind her and moves a chair below the handle.]

Roselle:
Let us in this instant! It is not time for you to be there.

Eda:
Stop babying me!

[She turns around, then visibly gets uncomfortable. Inside the room are various demons in rocking chairs, stacked in shelves, all of them grinning ominously and most of them drooling.]

Eda:
This vacation just took an alarming, back‐alley turn. [waves her hand in front of one of them]

Baby:
Tasty num‐nums.

Eda:
Ew.

Bowtie:
Don't bother.

Eda:
[shouts]

Bowtie:
Their minds are tragically gone. They've been coddled so long, they forgot how to live on their own. Their brains turned to mush.

Eda:
Geez, I thought I liked being babied. But I feel so small and helpless, like some sort of... baby. But that won't happen to us, right?

Bowtie:
[purrs while playing with a ball of yarn; gurgles]

Eda:
I failed you, Bowtie. My closest ally.

Bowtie:
Meow. Meow. [rolls face first onto the floor]

[pounding]

Eda:
[gasps]

Dottie:
[growling]

Eda:
I'll avenge you, Bowtie! [throws him]

Bowtie:
[meows]

[Bowtie lands on Roselle's face. Dottie goes to help her. Eda sees sunlight.]

Eda:
Ooh!

[She runs for the light, diving through a hole. She runs into a window.]

Eda:
Huh?

Monster:
[grunts and floats away]

Dottie:
[snarling]

Roselle:
Oh, wonderful! Now everyone can see our bestest baby... [holds up the bee costume] forever.

Eda:
No!

[Cut to King successfully jumping and grabbing a flag.]

King:
Weh! Not so high and mighty anymore. [throws it on the ground] I feel so alive! [yelps]

[He falls into a trashcan. Freeze frame with "KING'S BRUSH WITH DEATH" above the trash can. Action resumes as the trash can falls. A water balloon hits the ground next to the trash can. Tentacles grow out of the water.]

King:
[backing away] Oh, no! [shouts and ducks] The flag, it seeks revenge.

[Distant laughing is heard. King looks to a cliff, where Skara and a Potions student are standing. The latter throws a water balloon on the ground.]

Man #1:
[caught in tentacles] Help me! I'm a delicate man.

King:
Teenagers.

[Cut to King pulling himself onto the cliff.]

Potions Student:
[grabbing another water balloon from a bag] Hey, take this, society! [breaks the balloon over himself] Oh, no. [shouts]

[A tentacle grabs him. King crawls over to a building with signs reading "TREASURE SHACK." King sniffs under the curtain, then looks under it. Amelia and Boscha are on their scrolls while the Oracle student is flying upside down with winged boots, attempting to do a sit-up.]

Oracle Student:
[groaning]

Boscha:
[scoffs] Just give up.

Oracle Student:
I swear, I can do a sit‐up. I'm just having a bad day. [groans]

Boscha:
Sure, you can.

[Amelia stands and throws a peace sign as Boscha goes over to take a picture of him struggling.]

King:
I'll show Luz how to rule over these doofuses. [enters] Greetings! Er... [stands up] Greetings! Bow before your king of humans.

Oracle Student:
[falls and grunts] Hey, nobody tells me what to do.

Boscha:
[scoffs] Shut it.

Oracle Student:
Sorry, Boscha.

Boscha:
[typing on her scroll] New post: Loser human thinks she can hang out in our sacred Treasure Shack. Spoiler alert: She can't.

Oracle Student:
[flying over] Yeah, get out of here, Goody Two‐Shoes.

King:
Goody Two‐Shoes, huh?

[King steals his flying boots, making him fall on the ground. King flies out of the Treasure Shack, grabbing the bag of water balloons from Skara.]

King:
Hey, impressionable youths!

[Amelia and the Oracle student walk out, them and Skara staring up at King.]

King:
Under my command, you could learn how to do some real damage. Nyeh!

[He swings the bag around and throws the whole thing. Tentacles taller than the library spring forth. King spins around to face them slowly.]

King:
All hail, your new teen king.

Oracle Student:
I didn't like her telling me what to do before, but now, I love it.

Boscha:
[huffs]

King:
Who wants to revolt with me today?

Skara:
Yay! You're the coolest.

Oracle Student:
We love you now.

Amelia:
I love it!

[Skara and Amelia fly off with King. The Oracle student looks down at his socked feet.]

Oracle Student:
Uh, I'll catch up. [runs after them]

Boscha:
Hold up. I did not give you permission to leave.

[Amelia flies down and picks up the Oracle student.]

King:
All right, you acne‐encrusted hormone buckets. Let's go let out some teen angst!

Music:
♪ You're hanging with the cool kids ♪ ♪ Breaking all the rules kids ♪ ♪ We're gonna have to fool the kids ♪ ♪ Into thinking that you're cool too ♪ ♪ They pierce their noses ♪ ♪ They dye their hair... ♪

[As the music plays, the teens wreck havoc through town. The Oracle student shuffles the facial features of two witches waiting for the bus, making them both scream. A third lowers a newspaper to show that their face is already shuffled. King shrugs. The Oracle student shuffles their face to normal orientation. They scream. Cut to a sign that reads "SELF STORAGE." Amelia takes off the "S" and the "STO." She and the others hide behind a booth as an elf approaches the sign now reading "ELF RAGE"]

Elf:
Yeah, this sign gets it!

[He grunts and rips his shirt off, then punches the sign and runs off. The teens laugh, then gasp and run off when the elf returns. Cut to them all laughing as King, holding a crow, shushes them.]

King:
Guys, be quiet.

[He dials a number on the crow, which caws. Cut to the Owl House, where a crow caws repeatedly. Hooty picks it up.

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