The Pallbearer Page #3

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- Do you wanna get some coffee?

- Unbelievable.

- He's pickin' up chicks.

- Coffee?

Yeah. If you wouldn't mind.

- Yeah, all right.

Why don't you call me?

- C-Call you?

- Get him off.

- All right, let's go.

- Whoa!

- All right, all right.

Come on, back it up.

I never should've asked you

to be a pallbearer.

It was too much for you.

- There's a will.

- What?

You're in the will.

All the way in.

Hello?

- Julie, hi.

- Hi.

- Hi, it's Tom Thompson.

- Oh. Tom.

- Hi. How are you?

- I'm fine.

So listen, um, I was calling

because we've talked about din... um...

- Uh...

- What did we talk about?

- Did we, at the funeral,

talk about doing this, uh...

- Right, right.

- The coffee thing.

- Yes!

- Um, listen, I was thinking...

- Yeah?

What if Scott and Cynthia come along?

- Scott and Cynthia?

- Yeah.

- Oh, you mean like a, uh...

- Yeah, you know, like the four of us.

- Tom!

- 'Cause I'm seeing Cynthia

on Tuesday anyway.

- Tu... On Tuesday?

- Tom!

- Who was that?

- Huh? Oh, it's, uh... it's ju...

- This crazy woman...

Jesus, this neighborhood is...

Hey, lady, you wanna keep it down?

I am on the phone here!

Are you on the phone?

- Hello.

- Hello?

- Hello?

Who is this? Hello?

Jesus.

Tom?

Oh, my God. Tom?

Uh, hel...

...Ulie?

- H-Hello?

- Julie? Julie?

- Hi! Hi!

Wh... Well, that was weir...

What was that?

lt... Did...

D- Did you... That was really creepy.

- She just kept saying "hello."

Did you hear her?

- No. Didn't you hear me?

- Y... No.

- No? I w... Well, I was calling you.

Were you trying to contact me?

Uh, y-y-yeah.

I ke... I kept saying "Julie."

Didn't... It must've been

a weird party line thing.

- That has never happened before.

- Huh.

So listen,

Tuesday is bowling night.

- Oh.

- Uh, how about Thursday?

Great.

Oh, no,

I- I can't take his car.

Look at this mess.

Mrs. Abernathy.

- Take it. He wanted you to have it.

- No, really, I can't.

I gotta get it out of here.

Please.

Twenty-five-year-old kid

makes out a will.

I should've known right then.

I brought you some, uh...

nut clusters.

They're my favorite.

Oh, Tom.

I'm sorry about the funeral.

So...

how are you doing?

I'm fine, I'm...

I'm gonna be.

Thank you.

Maybe I should just

have them take it all away.

- Oh, here, here.

Let me help you with that.

- Thanks.

I gotta get it all out of here

if I'm gonna sell this place.

Oh, you're gonna

sell the house?

Yeah. You know, maybe

it's too big for one person.

Too quiet.

I mean, it's like I have

the TV on all the time now.

Thank you. It's very nice to have

someone to help out around here.

Oh, sure.

Who knows? You know,

I was thinking, maybe, of going

to one of those computer schools.

Oh, yeah, computers.

That's good.

You think so?

I'm gonna have to go through

Bill's stuff in his room.

- I wish I could help you out.

- Oh, no, no.

I mean, it's just that

I'm... I'm very busy.

- I mean, I got a job interview.

- Oh, a job interview.

Yeah. Actually it's a second interview.

I bet you get it.

Thank you.

I hope so.

I'm a little worried.

Do you mind if

I make a suggestion?

- Sure.

- Why don't you try pushing

your hair back over your forehead.

You know, like the other afternoon.

Like... Yeah, like that.

Just...

You don't let 'em see your face.

You're a good-looking man.

Well, maybe I'll let you

know how the interview goes.

I mean, if you're interested.

- Sure. If you have enough time,

you can drop by.

- Yeah, if I have the time.

- Whoa! My God, look at you.

- He's turned a corner.

Oh, very important. I sort of mentioned

that I live on my own, okay?

- So just don't blow it.

- You lied to her?

- No, she seemed to have

a thing about it.

- So what are we supposed to say?

- Oh, this is it!

- What are we supposed to do at the end?

- Cynthia and I are going for cocktails?

- A late movie.

- You guys say you have plans

to see a late movie, then just go.

- How are we getting home?

Deal with it.

I need the car.

He's gotta drive her home.

That's the whole point.

Could you give me an opening for

the story about Brad and the oranges?

- Tom, just be yourself.

- Yeah, you're right.

- Scott, you set me up

with the orange story.

- You got it.

Wait, wait, wait.

Wh... What was it?

- Uh, "Mean To Me," maybe?

- No, no!

- Louis Armstrong did

a great versin of it too.

- Oh! Oh, oh, oh. Uh...

It goes:

# Dah dah-dah dah-dah #

# Dah dah-dah dah-dah

Dah dah-dah dah-dah #

- # Dah dah-dah dah-dah... #

- # If I only had a brain #

Tom, you've heard of

Django Reinhardt, right?

- No, Scott.

- Oh, my God. He is so amazing.

- He only had three fingers.

- Really?

- Yeah.

- Mmm. That's too bad.

So, anyway...

Julie, did you know Tom's

got a second interview tomorrow?

Oh! That's great.

- Yeah, well...

- "I Surrender, Dear."

- You what, honey?

- # Dah-dah, dah-dah #

# Dah-dah, dah-dah #

# I surrender, dear ##

I love that song.

Oh, you know what? I think that's

on Decca. I've seen it in the bins.

- What, you have that record?

- Yeah.

I need that record desperately!

- Yeah, so they seemed

to really like my portfolio.

- What?

Oh, 'cause... Oh!

That's so exciting, Tom.

- Yeah, you should really see

Tom's stuff. It's so great.

- Oh, go on.

Well, it's a really good firm

and they seem to have room to grow.

And you can maybe finally

move out of your mom's house.

Didn't you have... What was that,

that story about Brad and oranges?

Didn't you have a story

about Brad and oranges?

No, Scott.

Whoa, Cynthia and I

have to, uh...

we have to go get

some cocktails.

Mmm.

I- I-I cannot believe you.

I'm sorry. That thing about

your mother just slipped out.

No, the whole evening.

What were those topics?

- You were supposed to feed me openings

so I could jump in with the zingers.

- I was.

- You weren't zinging.

- Oh, bullshit!

- How am I supposed to zing

on, what, "jingle-jangle"?

- Django Reinhardt!

Look, I'm sorry. She told me

she was working in this record store.

- You told me to keep things flowing.

- Oh, flowing. Yes, flo...

You know,

you're making me sick, Scott.

- You still have the drive home.

- The drive home?

The drive home is useless, you know.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- Hi.

- Hi.

You know, we really didn't get

much of a chance to talk tonight.

I wanted to tell you something.

I remember you.

We shared a music stand,

didn't we?

Yeah.

I used to talk to you

about that guy I went out with... Kenny.

That's right.

Anyway...

What I remember is...

you were a really nice guy.

Julie.

- Oww! Oh, sh*t.

- Ooh!

I am so... Ohh. Okay.

- Oh, my God.

- I should've warned you I was going in.

- Oh, God.

- Are... Are you...

No, you know, it's my fault.

I just... I do this, you know.

L... I give out

the wrong signals.

Oh.

L...

I'm re... I'm really sorry, Tom.

I'm going away.

You're going away?

- It's sort of a... sort of a long story.

- But you just moved back.

Well, I'm not really here.

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