The Pink Panther Page #2

And what is that?

- What?

- Nothing.

You should probably start

by looking at these files. You have to...

My leg, it crushed my leg!

Being an inspector,

you'll need some new clothes.

I can take your measurements

and have something sent over.

- Of course.

- Please remove your jacket.

Yes.

- Do you live by yourself, inspector?

- Yes, I do.

Do you get lonely?

No, not really.

Not since the Internet.

Well, that takes care of that.

And welcome to Paris.

Thank you.

Good morning, monsieur.

And you are?

Gilbert Ponton.

Detective, second class.

I've been assigned to work with you.

What qualifications do you have

for police work?

My family's done police work

in Paris for nine generations.

- And before that?

- We were policemen for 200 years.

- And before that?

- Immigrants from countries in Europe.

- All involved in police work.

- And before that?

Farmers.

So you are a little lamb who has

come to Clouseau for to learn.

Gilbert Ponton, I vow to teach you

everything I know about police work.

And together...

...we are going to catch a killer.

There.

The Chinese VIP box,

right on the edge of the kill zone.

The poison was Chinese.

Was Gluant ever in China?

Three years ago, he took a group

of French stars there...

...for some exhibition games.

Gluant was in China...

...the poison is from China...

...the Chinese are from China.

It may be too early to say for certain,

but I think our killer is Chinese.

Corbeille, I want you

on the next flight to Beijing.

Find out what Gluant did there,

who he saw, where he went.

Pacquette, I want a dossier

on every Chinaman in that box.

Go, go, go, go, go.

Inspector, it's awfully late and...

Oh, I'm just going over

these crime-scene photos.

- Don't you need some rest?

- Crime does not rest, Nicole.

It's true.

You see...

...I have waited a long time

to prove myself.

And I've been given

the opportunity of a lifetime.

And I intend to show the world

exactly who I am...

...and what I can do.

I must not fail.

You won't. I know it.

Thank you, Nicole.

- Nicole?

- Yes?

May I be very frank with you?

Of course.

You have put on a ton of weight.

Now, what I do

when I get a little heavy...

Never mind.

Would you like me to stay behind

and help you?

That is a generous offer, Nicole...

...but I am quite sensitive

to office gender politics.

And in today's world,

the slightest gesture...

...can be misinterpreted

as harassment.

And it is late, and I would prefer

not to put you or me...

...into that delicate situation.

Agreed?

Yes, I agree.

Well, let's seal it with a kiss.

And I'll get back to work.

I am going to be frank.

Since you are only a detective,

second class...

...your senses may not be as sharp

as my own.

And as I do not want a partner

who makes me duller...

...I have come up with a plan

to keep you as sharp as possible.

And what is that?

Intermittently, and without warning,

I will attack you...

...whenever and wherever

it is least expected.

In this way, I will keep you

vigilant and alert. Agreed?

Yes.

- Good one.

- Thank you.

Here we are.

"Do not open door

when light is flashing."

Excuse me.

Coming through. Thank you.

And I'm wondering if you... Yes.

I'm wondering if you saw, perhaps,

a person yelling.

Stop! Stop, stop!

Who are you,

and what the hell are you doing?

- I'm in the middle of an interrogation.

- The booth is soundproof.

She can't hear a word.

And in case you haven't noticed...

...you ruined my recording session.

Now, get out.

Unless you want to be charged

with obstruction of justice...

...you will let me interrogate Xania.

It's all right, Roland.

Hello, inspector.

I'm Xania.

You do not know this, but I am

intimately familiar with your work.

You are very kind.

Did you say that booth

was soundproof?

Yes.

Now, you were nearby

when Gluant was killed?

Yes, I ran out to be with him

after the team won.

Of course you did.

Now, a few hours

before the murder...

...six witnesses saw you repeatedly

striking the deceased and screaming...

What was it, Ponton?

"I am going to kill you.

I am going to kill you."

I was angry.

I caught him with another woman.

And this was after

he said he loved me.

You poor little angel waif.

After he cheated on me...

...I hated him.

- But I didn't kill him.

- Of course you didn't.

- You recently performed in China...

- Stop browbeating her!

Can't you see she's sexy?

Three months ago in Shanghai.

Can you think of anyone else

who might have hated Gluant?

- Bizu.

- The football star?

I was dating Bizu when I met Gluant.

He thought Gluant was a bad guy

for stealing me away.

- Lf you ask me, they were both...

- You, don't leave town.

But I'm flying to Montserrat

to record Rene Duchanel...

You will not leave town. I may want

to ask you a few more questions.

But I don't know anything.

About life, about love.

Yes, you little wet puppy.

But about the crime

you may know a lot.

Inspector.

Do I have to stay in town?

Because next week

I have something...

...vague to do in New York.

Well, if you absolutely have

to do something vague...

...feel free to go where you wish.

I can't take you to Bizu, but I can

take you to Monsieur Vainqueur...

...the team's assistant coach.

Well, I guess he's

the head coach now.

- You wanted to see me?

- You are Vainqueur?

Yes. And who are you?

I am Inspector Clouseau.

Perhaps you have heard of me.

No.

Don't write that down.

- What do you want?

- I am told that Bizu hated Gluant.

A lot of people hated Gluant.

Did you?

I spent six years under his thumb

being verbally abused every day.

Yes, I was not a fan

of Yves Gluant.

And now he is dead...

...and you have his job.

Ironic.

Not every death is a tragedy.

- And what was the...?

- Footsteps.

It's a young woman...

...30 to 35 years old...

...5'2", 5'4", brunette.

And she is wearing high heels.

Perhaps a bit too formal

for the afternoon.

And she has on...

...Chanel N5.

- Is anyone with you?

- No.

Do you have a pair of high heels

in that bag?

- No.

- Not even a small pair of pumps?

- No.

- Who are you?

I am Yuri, the trainer.

And what is it you do here,

Yuri the trainer?

I train.

So you are Yuri the trainer

who trains.

Do not leave Europe.

But I have to go to Asia.

Okay.

Do not leave Europe or Asia.

We have one match in Brazil.

All right.

Do not leave Europe, Asia

or the Americas.

- Okay.

- Where is this famous soccer player?

He is outside on the practice field.

Well, we shall see about Mr. Bizu.

I've got Bizu

in the interrogation room.

What's the plan?

I'm going to give him the

good-coplbad-cop routine.

You are the soccer player

known as Bizu?

- Yes.

- You were acquainted with Gluant?

- I'm glad he's pushing up daisies.

- He is not pushing up daisies.

He is dead.

It's an idiom.

You, sir, are the idiom.

Now, unless you want to spend

the rest of your life in prison...

...you will answer the next question.

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