The Return of the Living Dead Page #3

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- I do, and I need it.

What are you doing there?

Breaking out the rigor mortis.

Yeah?

Come here.

Come on.

You see, rigor mortis starts in the brain.

And it spreads down to the internal organs,

and it finally settles in the muscles.

It loosens up after a while...

but you can break it out manually,

as they say...

by flexing the muscles.

- See that?

- Yeah.

You'll not find that in a book, my friend.

The embalming business is basically

passed on by word of mouth.

I'll tell you, that's fascinating,

that's really something.

He's dead now. And I am bushed.

Buddy boy.

How long we been friends? About how long?

Twenty-five years, give or take.

If I ask you a favor,

could you keep it quiet?

Sure. What is it?

I'm gonna need some help

in a pretty big way, really.

You can depend on me. Why? What's wrong?

I got a couple of my men out here,

you mind if I let them in?

No, that's illegal.

You can bring it on in now, please.

You can put it right over here.

Right here.

What is that?

- Right there, please.

- Here?

I got to...

What the hell's in those bags?

Rabid weasels.

What the hell are you doing

with a bunch of rabid weasels?

I was trying to explain it.

They came as a shipment.

They weren't supposed to be rabid,

but you know how these things happen.

I don't. How do they happen?

Watch out, don't get bit.

Anyway, we got them,

and we need your help.

- How?

- We got to get rid of these things.

Why don't you call an animal shelter?

Word'd get out, hurt my business.

You know, that's a bad scene, rabies.

I don't think so.

I mean, so what?

You don't run a pet store.

Some lab animals got rabies.

Come on, take them to the pound.

I just can't do that.

You got to take my word for it.

- What the hell do you want me to do?

- You have a crematorium, right?

- You wanna burn them?

- That's what I had in mind.

- That's cruel.

- I can't think of anything else to do.

You just can't burn animals alive.

It's just too hideous.

At least let me kill them first.

Take them out in the parking lot,

and put 'em out of their misery.

I don't think that'd work.

I don't understand what's going on.

Why not?

- Can you swear to keep a secret?

- At this point, I don't know.

No, you got to swear.

You got to, or I just can't tell you.

- All right, I swear.

- Good.

It's not weasels in the bags.

No kidding. Look here.

Get it off!

I'm sorry.

No, it's all right.

We got a...

We got a long story to tell you.

Great. Some party.

What happened to Trash and Suicide?

Probably getting it on somewhere.

Don't even think it, Chuck.

God, when's 10:
00 gonna come?

If you wanna split,

we could both go somewhere.

You'd really like to do it with me,

wouldn't you?

- I mean, a girl like you and a guy like me.

- Go choke a chicken.

Come on, Casey. I was only kidding.

- Great, here's your friend and mine.

- F*** you, ball buster.

My watch stopped. What time is it?

Going on 10:
00.

Fudge. I'd better get over and find Freddy.

He's gonna be getting off any time.

Go ahead, we'll wait for you.

- Don't go anywhere, okay?

- All right.

Come on, Freddy, where are you?

Frankly, I think you acted

precipitously in cutting up the corpse.

You may be right,

I don't know, but I did it.

What are we gonna do about it?

If I let you use the crematorium,

what's in it for me?

What do you want?

The way I see it,

this is a pretty big favor.

You got it! Whatever it is you want,

so help me, I'll do it. I promise.

I'm sorry about that.

Let's take care of your problem.

You're gonna owe me a big one.

You're gonna get rid of everything for me.

Nothing left.

- Is that right?

- Everything'll go.

What about the bones?

Bones are no problem.

The hardest thing to burn is the heart.

- The heart? Why?

- 'Cause it's just one big, tough muscle.

Come on.

We don't want the heart sticking around.

Then I'll turn it up hotter for it.

What about the split dogs? They got to go.

The split dogs will go, too.

Come on, just give me a hand.

It's your mess.

Some big favor.

I can operate that goddamn thing.

You're absolutely certain...

that this will get rid of everything

and do the trick?

- Nothing left?

- Nothing but a little-bitty pile of ashes.

We don't even want the ashes.

Then I'll turn it up higher,

and we'll burn up the ashes, too.

Dust to dust.

- My radio.

- Come on, you guys.

Let's get back to the car. Damn it.

Come on.

Freddy?

Anybody?

Get the f***in' top! F***.

Come on!

- Close the motherfuckin' windows.

- I don't have any windows.

I busted them.

- Hey, my skin burns.

- Me, too. Damn it.

It's that rain, it's like acid rain.

Start the car!

It's all over me.

A towel, somebody give me a towel.

- We ain't got no towel!

- Well, then give me something.

- Give me that.

- No!

Come on, start!

- Suicide, get the car going.

- I'm trying.

Crap, I wonder what's in that rain.

It's coming down like

einen getrunken soldat.

- Is the heart gone, Ernie?

- It's all burned up.

- Are you sure?

- Right up the chimney.

Goddamn, that's all we need.

We're home free, Frank.

We got it made. You just saved our ass,

buddy boy, and I owe you one. Goddamn!

Yes, you do.

Let's go to the warehouse, clean up,

and get the hell out of there.

What do you say, Frank?

Okay, just give me a second to rest

and catch my breath. Then we'll go, okay?

I don't know about you,

but I'm really sick.

What's wrong, Fred?

I feel like hell is what's wrong.

I'm really sick.

I'm sick, too, Burt.

- Sick, like how?

- Like my head's going to bust wide open.

- And I want to puke. And I'm weak, too.

- Me, too. I got the chills.

It's that stuff, Burt.

It's that goddamn stuff we breathed.

What stuff? What are you talking about?

When that canister cracked,

this gas squirted out.

It hit us right in the face.

We breathed it.

It knocked us out.

- We were out cold, unconscious.

- Christ!

Shouldn't we get to a doctor or something?

Yeah, I need a doctor.

I'm getting the car and taking

these guys to the emergency ward.

Let's go, Frank. You're gonna be

all right. I'm gonna get you...

Hey, Frank!

Come here, Ernie.

What's the matter? Talk to me.

Get him out of the rain.

I got to call my wife.

I gotta go to the hospital!

You can't run around in this storm.

You're too sick.

Burt.

Take it easy.

- I'm gonna call an ambulance.

- Paramedics.

It's all right. How do you feel now?

Hello. Yes. Can we get some paramedics

over here right away?

That's the Resurrection Funeral Home...

at 21702 East Central.

Tell them to come around the back,

to the embalming room.

Poison. We have two men poisoned here.

No, we don't know what kind of poison.

Right.

Thank you very much. Bye.

Burt, they're on their way.

- This car ain't going nowhere.

- Damn it.

Do you hear something?

Hear what?

Something.

- No, I don't hear nothing.

- This roof's leaking.

There's a rip, damn it. Sh*t.

- Don't do that!

- Sorry.

- Damn it!

- I'm sorry.

Sh*t, Scuz!

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