The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause Page #3

I get sniffly without my cap.

OK, OK.

All right, all right.

Hey, Dad?

Scott Calvin, as I live and breathe.

Good thing you called.

Otherwise I don't know

if I would've remembered you.

It's me, good old Scott Calvin.

You look a little like Father Time.

Doesn't look anything

like Father Time.

Oh. That's a nice door.

Well, thank you. Yeah.

It was a little sticky,

but smooth as a baby's butt now.

- Come, take a feel.

- Oh, why not, huh?

Look at that.

Very butt-like.

Who's your pal?

Sandy. This is my associate.

He'll be taking us to the airport.

- An associate? Business must be good.

- Busy as usual.

So busy you can't bring our daughter

to visit her mother and father?

Scott.

Oh, so nice to see you.

- You too, Sylvia.

- And your friend?

- Sandy.

- Sandy.

Nice to meet you.

Do you know how excited

we were to get your phone call?

See, we get so few,

and each one is special.

Oh, come on, you guys,

you'll catch pneumonia out here.

It's so wonderful

to have you all here.

- Festive.

- Easy.

Please, please sit down.

Oh, no, no, no. No.

We gotta get to the airport.

Kind of a hurry. Let's get

your bags and pop 'em in the car.

- I'm almost packed.

- Great!

Throw my underwear in a bag. It's not

like we're going to the North Pole.

- It's cold in Canada.

- Well...

Remember when we went to Yosemite?

Oh, here we go, Yosemite again.

It was freezing

and there were bears.

You never left the lodge.

Because it was freezing.

- And there were bears?

- Yes! And it was freezing.

- It was freezing weather?

- It was in the freezing weather.

Let me understand.

You did not enjoy the trip to Yosemite?

- You heard me.

- I heard you.

What?

What part of our plan was not clear?

Let's put them to sleep

when they get into the car.

I couldn't stand to hear

the Yosemite story anymore.

OK. So let's figure how we'll

get in the car. We'll both...

Sandman, what are you doing?

What? Sandman. Sandman!

Great, I get to throw

his underwear in a bag.

Hey, Mrs C. What you doing?

Oh, hi, Jack.

I'm trying to pick a tree

the whole family will love.

Ah, family.

You know, I cannot imagine

how hard it must be

keeping such a big secret

from your folks.

Oh, you have no idea.

Tell me, Mrs Claus...

...being legendary by marriage,

do you ever find yourself wondering

if it's all really worth it?

Well, it's definitely worth it.

I'm sure dropping your life,

schlepping all the way to the North Pole

- has been totally worthwhile.

- Yeah.

Probably not one iota,

not even a scintilla, of regret?

- Not one.

- Yeah.

Look at that. Oh, dear.

A little sad, neglected maybe.

Just needs a little tender loving care

that nobody's bothering to give,

don't you think?

It's perfect.

I will give you all

the TLC that you need.

Scott loves decorating the tree.

He always insists on putting

the tree topper on himself.

Ho ho ho!

They're here!

This is so exciting.

I'm here! I cannot believe it!

I'm actually here!

What a wonderful surprise.

I didn't know you were coming.

- Uncle Scott brought me.

- Hey.

And we tagged along!

Hey! Hey! Hi!

Oh, it's tall people...

Not that you're not tall.

Surprise!

- Hello!

- Oh, you look wonderful.

- Really?

- You are glowing.

- What did you think of my parents?

- They slept the entire trip.

This is amazing!

Can we see the workshop?

Yes. Go right there.

Go ahead.

Oh, wait, wait, wait!

My mom and dad can't know we're

at Santa's workshop in the North Pole.

Where do they think we are?

Welcome to Canada!

Eh?

An easy flight,

we cruised through customs.

Oh, what a strange flight.

Go, go, go.

It was like a dream.

And such a nice meal.

They gave you a meal?

I got four nuts in a pouch.

And you had us sit in coach.

No, that was first class.

And I got a chance to sit

next to Tony Bennett.

Mom! Dad!

Sweetheart! Sweetheart.

- Come here.

- Oh, you!

Look at you, look at you.

And look at this, look at this.

It could be twins.

But since you married the toymaker,

we don't get a lot of information.

Oh, honey, just stop it, OK?

Sweetheart, I am just so happy

to see you, darling.

I'm so happy to see you, too, Mom.

I'm sure you have

a perfectly good reason

for shutting us out of your life.

Magnificent.

It's amazing.

Killer.

Please remember,

you're welcome to observe,

but don't touch

or interfere with toy-making.

I'll make sure she

doesn't get into anything.

Look! Kobi the Magic Panda

and accessories!

Lucy!

Lucy, come back here.

Whoa!

Trains.

I'm... I'm just gonna go make a doll!

Oh, excellent job.

Bang, bang!

Isn't that fun?

Faster, worker elves, faster.

The Hall of Snow Globes, perhaps?

What might we have here.

It's a lot of beans.

How many beans can he eat?

Who are you?

Who are you?

You don't resemble

one of the red man's minions.

- What's the deal?

- I'm Lucy. Scott's my uncle.

Ohh. I'm Frost.

- Jack Frost.

- Who?

Jack Frost.

You know, the Jack Frost?

Never heard of you.

Jack Frost.

Legendary figure. Ring a bell?

No. But I know about Tooth Fairy

and Sandman and the Easter Bunny.

You got to know about me, I'm

a legendary figure, with enormous power.

- OK, OK, chill.

- I invented chill!

Sorry.

Hey...

How would you like to be

one of my elves?

No.

Hey, Mom?

No.

What a quaint little village.

Everybody's just so petite.

No. Tom Cruise is petite.

These people are short.

- What's the deal with them?

- Who? What?

Oh...

Have you ever been to Canada?

No. It's too far.

We did go to Rochester, New York, once,

to visit her sister.

Very lovely place.

But it's not Canada, is it?

No.

Well, this is...

This is what Canadians look like.

And stretch.

Stretch.

Let all those packages go.

Know that you're enough.

And breathe.

Very good.

Don't forget you can do this on your own

whenever you get stressed out.

I won't always be here

to help you.

Stress can reduce your life

by hundreds of years.

Hundreds.

You take Christmas very seriously.

- It's the most wonderful time of year.

- Yeah!

Honey, just because

you're not into Christmas

doesn't mean others can't enjoy it.

Kids won't enjoy their toys this year.

This should've been in stores weeks ago.

Oh. No worries. We have a unique

distribution system here.

In order to distribute this stuff

you're gonna have to freeze time.

Manipulating the space-time continuum

for one-night global delivery

is the easy part.

Who are you?

Curtis.

Eh?

- Who's hungry?

- Hey, guys, how you doing?

- Who's hungry?

- Hey, guys, how you doing?

Come here. Got some exciting news.

Will put a little spring

into your elfin step.

Santa says he really

wants you to take a break.

So there's a delicious vat

of steaming hot cocoa in the lounge

with your little names on it.

Oh, it's a tantalising blend

of full, rich cocoa

with just a suggestion...

...of vanilla.

Get in there and try some, won't you?

It's got your names on it.

Enjoy.

A sumptuous blend of Gold Coast

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