The Singing Detective Page #4

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Nicola!

Who are you

spreading your legs for now?

Come back here now,

you stupid

b*tch whore c*nt!

Mr. Dark, what do you

think you're doing?

Where do you

think you are?

l'm so sorry.

ls there a problem?

Yes, there's

a problem.

You're the problem.

Stop the yelling.

lt's disgusting.

You should be

ashamed of yourself.

You stop it at once!

l so don't want

to be disruptive.

Good.

l was just sort of singing.

You were what?

Many a tear has to fall

But it's all in the game.

Ah, there are mysteries,

puzzles.

There are always things

that bewilder us

as children, Mr. Dark.

Mmm.

Accept it. Yes?

Mmm.

Accept the sky,

accept the birds.

Accept bird sh*t.

Has your wife been

to visit you yet?

God, the way you walk

up and down behind me.

l mean, are you pretending

to be an oddball,

or are you actually nuts?

Ah, there you are.

You're looking better.

Uh-huh. Am l?

Yeah. Your posture, too.

-Great.

-Less pain?

Yeah, maybe.

Well, you know, you-you ought

to let those neck muscles

...relax a little.

Oh, l'm sorry.

Forgive me. l, uh...

God.

Well, that's why l...

Well, look, l just...

lf you could just

turn your head.

Uh, you'd-you'd get

fewer headaches that way.

Who says l get headaches?

Oh, you do,

don't you?

Severe ones, hmm?

And no doubt, as a result,

your perceptions are probably

somewhat distorted, hmm?

Yeah. l can see around corners

and right up

your hairy little self.

Not to mention that

ugly temper, yeah.

Minute by minute,

we make the world, Doc.

Our own world.

Hmm.

Well, what do you think?

You think it's time maybe

you went back to work again?

Tell me how, Dr. Donothing.

Well, l never write

anything down myself.

l dictate.

Never tried it.

With whom?

Question mark.

Well, there are people.

Agencies.

Has somebody been getting

to you?

What do you mean?

Has a certain whore

of my former acquaintance been

pushing her hard little nose

into my affairs?

Mr. Dark,

do you plan

to get better?

Hmm?

Chronic illness

is a shelter. Yeah.

A cave in the rocks

into which a wounded

spirit can safely crawl.

Some cave.

Oh, no, no, no.

Not very comfortable,

not at all.

No. There are bats in it. Mmm.

Squeaking rodents

with wings of skin and fur,

that hang upside down,

crunching beetles

in their teeth.

But you know all about that.

You know about bats.

Shut up, shrimp.

You turned, you turned!

l did.

l did.

Not now. No. Go.

Who was that?

Huh?

What's that?

That's progress, Mr. Dark.

Progress.

Who knows how far it can go.

Oh, from the neck down,

you mean.

Hmm?

lf you're thinking

the other way around,

if you want to

get inside my head,

you better forget it.

Hmm. Good.

Wait. You...

He's asleep.

-Who is?

-My boy.

You mean you got a kid in here?

Jesus.

Shh, shh, shh.

Not so loud.

Listen, doll, when l f***,

l like to make a noise, okay?

All right, all right.

Come on.

This way. lt's okay.

Here we go.

What a disgusting disease.

Gee, thanks.

Dan. l don't...

No, no, no. Sit down,

sit down. Why not?

Keep the laughs coming.

Who's laughing?

You are beyond the

shadow of a doubt

an exceptionally

beautiful woman.

At your peak.

That sounds like

a death sentence.

lt is a death sentence.

Dan, listen...

Three months l've been

in this f***ing bed.

You know that?

Where you been?

Who are you? What are you?

l don't know.

l hallucinate now and then.

Ain't that a laugh?

The past, the present--

they're all in that

cheap old book of mine,

and l didn't even know it.

So are you, honey.

-Me?

-Uh-huh.

Nicola.

Yeah.

You are a filthy,

predatory, totally wanton b*tch

who is always in heat,

and l don't want you near me.

l don't.

l don't. Not now.

l don't. Not ever.

What if l said

l still loved you?

Liar.

l have some things

to discuss with you.

There's a film company

that wants to buy the rights

to that first book.

What?

the Singing Detective.

The one set in the '50s.

ls that the book

you've been talking about?

They want it

for Roger Rabbit, right?

No.

They seem, um...

keen.

Keen?

Hey, what's this got to do

with you?

You're broke,

and you haven't written a word

for over a year.

l mean, Danny,

l just want you to be able

to support yourself.

Oh, God, l see.

Baby, Baby-- still thinks

l owe her money.

No.

You could work

it out at, say,

$500 a screw.

lsn't that top rate for hookers?

ls it?

l wouldn't know.

Who are you sleeping with

at the moment?

Myself, mostly.

Mostly?

Mostly.

Mostly means not always.

Right, if you want

to be precise.

Dan...

you need to function.

You just...

you need to get your hand

on that old book...

What happened to the screenplay?

Where is it?

What screenplay?

The one in my head.

What are you talking about?

That is the

worst thing

about a detective

story is the plot.

lt's the best thing, too.

l mean, hell,

isn't it really... ?

lt's just... it's

the only thing.

You got to work it out

like a rat in a maze.

That's what l'm trying to do

right now.

Yeah, but with a story

you've already written?

Oh, oh, oh, oh...

lt grows.

How... when you already know

what's going to happen?

Where is it?!

Where is what?

The f***ing screenplay--

the Singing Detective.

l wrote it years ago;

l put in shoe boxes.

Shoe boxes?

Yes! F***ing shoe boxes!

Danny...

l know.

Boy, do l know.

Dan...

You need to write

something new.

Something real.

Like what?

Like this, like everything

that's happening right now.

Not a silly detective story.

Something real.

Ah, solutions.

What?

All solutions

and no clues, right?

'Cause that's

what the dumbheads want.

They want the serious novel,

right?

Plus descriptions

of the goddamn sky.

l want it

the other way around.

All clues, no solutions,

'cause that's the way...

things are.

Now...

Why do you know about this?

Why do you know?

Tell me.

Were you a party to the offer

in the first place?

Tell me what's going on.

Tell me.

Tell me!

Paranoia. l don't...

Or theft.

Danny, stop.

Do you want my help or not?

Do l want your help?

Do l want you to help me?

Well, you think on it.

Okay. You go f*** yourself.

Okay. l love you too, Danny.

Hey, Binney.

Quote, no luck, period.

No good, period.

He was getting very suspicious,

exclamation mark.

No luck. No good.

He's getting very suspicious.

But you'll try again, right?

l-l don't know.

But we could be sued

for misrepresentation

if he doesn't sign.

l'll deliver.

l said l would.

He still looks awful.

Don't start feeling

sorry for him.

l don't. l hope

it goes right into

his f***ing bones.

You look terrific

when you're mad.

Just like a hornet...

drowning in the Tabasco.

That's something

Dan Dark would say.

You sound like Dan.

Sorry, Charlie.

How much is that doggie

in the window?

The one with the waggley tail

How much is that doggie

in the window...?

She comes on like a rose

But everybody knows

She'll get you in Dutch

You can look,

but you better not touch

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