The Survivors Page #4

Semi-automatic. 308 caliber with...

...a folding stock.

I was gonna show you at breakfast.

You spoiled my surprise.

I've seen that look. You're mad at me.

I'm not mad at you.

Really? You're gonna love

these other goodies I got.

A little detachable bayonet. Look.

Hey. Self-cleaning too.

That's nice. It won't rust.

I got one for you.

It's called a " Fem-Prod"...

...or the " Little Squealer. "

Kind of nice...

...designer thing,

goes with any outfit.

I got another one here.

This is a concussion grenade.

That would break up any party.

These are little designer weapons.

Chinese throwing stars.

Put them as buttons and

if someone messes with you...

I got two extra clips.

These are fun. Look at that.

This is for a medium load,

and this is for a large.

Fifty shots.

This is it. He threw this

in for free. Look.

Looks like a belt buckle, doesn't it?

But, okay. Surprise!

- Now you're mad at me.

- I'm not mad at you.

You've been under pressure.

I know that pressure can make

people do crazy...

...and impulsive things.

No, I bought these things for us.

For you too.

What if someone broke in?

What will you do?

Stun him with good taste?

I bought them because there's a need.

The world's coming undone like a cheap

suit. We have to be ready.

This may be impulsive,

but it's not crazy.

Maybe we should get some rest

and talk about this tomorrow.

You should read this first.

"Give me two weeks,

I'll give you a future. "

I've enrolled us in this.

I want us to go to Vermont

for a few weeks.

- We may stay if we like it.

- You serious?

Yes, very much so.

Times are changing

and not for the better.

I never thought I'd consider

marrying a man with an automatic gun.

Semi-automatic.

Automatics are illegal.

- Why are you saying "consider"?

- I just mean, Donald...

...you seem so different.

- Whizzer...

...I'm no different, I'm just armed.

Survival training will be fun.

Like skiing,

except for booby traps.

I don't believe in surviving.

I believe in living.

Come on, take a chance.

I'm not gonna go.

If you want to go, you can.

But, I won't be here

when you get back.

Yes, you will.

You'll love me more when I'm back.

You'll remember I was a wimp

and love me more...

...because I'll be a real man.

- I love who you are now.

Or at least who I thought you were.

Don't...

I'm on my way. Got my gear. I'm

giving you one last chance to come.

You can give me

pointers when you get back.

Depending how things go,

I might not come back.

I may buy a survival condo

and stay indefinitely.

Indefinitely?

In case you want to visit,

here's the address and directions.

- There are no phones. You can't call.

- We'll write.

We'll tie messages on birds.

You look at me like

the lights are on, but nobody's home.

A man's gotta do

what a man's gotta do.

- I've never had a friend like you.

- Same here.

- Take care of yourself.

- You too, kid.

I get 47%

of the meter drop plus tips, right?

Car 89, your fare will

be in front of the address.

Looks like we gonna have us

a little rain.

Keeps up, this damp weather.

What do you think?

Let's go.

Take a right.

You escape?

- I made bail.

- They let you out.

They had me for attempted robbery,

and the computer didn't work.

So here we are.

You, temporarily.

- Take it right... Turn right here.

- Where?

At the next street.

Are you gonna start that sh*t again?

- Wait a second.

- You wait a second.

Hands in your pockets.

The police didn't link you

to the murders so nobody knows.

You know who I am.

Your friend knows.

I didn't say anything before, did I?

I could have told them.

I appreciate that. I don't know if

your friend's biscuits are done.

You give up on killing us...

...and we won't say anything

about your killing...

You see? I already forgot his name.

- Why don't we talk to him?

- He's out of town. Maybe indefinitely.

- Let's call him.

- There's no phone there.

- Can't talk to him, can't phone...

- Tell you what.

I have his address.

I'll give it to you.

Get away from the car. Come here.

I'll make you a deal. If I haven't

heard from him in a week...

...you'll be the deadest sons of

b*tches God strung a gut through.

Now, my phone number is 555-1727.

And don't call before 9 a. m.

- I'll take your car. You don't mind?

- My pleasure.

You remember that number.

Look.

Hello. We're looking for somebody.

But we could look someplace else.

I knew you'd change your mind.

I feel like a bear's gynaecologist.

- Hope you like scrambled eggs.

- I didn't know you cooked.

- I whip up something now and then.

- What else?

Powdered coffee, powdered pancakes,

powdered bacon.

You could snort breakfast.

I have. Here we go. There.

You get the hang of it real soon.

- Are those done?

- You bet.

What brings you here, huh?

You're probably fleeing

the Big Cesspool.

That's what Wes calls New York.

Kind of a play on words.

The Big Apple. The Big Cesspool.

- He's a witty guy.

- I can't wait for you to meet him.

- Why are you really here?

- Excuse us, sweetheart.

- Do I have to?

- Yes, go watch TV.

- No TV.

- How do you exist?

Go read a magazine. Look outside.

Listen to your headphones.

Watch for migrating geese.

You didn't take your breakfast.

Feed it to the migrating geese.

If the heat stays on,

the eggs turn back to powder.

Saw Jack the other night.

He's out on bail.

The only people worse

than lawbreakers are lawmakers.

I made a deal with him.

Stop cooking and listen to me.

I made a deal with Jack.

We reveal nothing...

...and he, in turn, leaves us alone.

But he wants to hear it from your lips.

That you go along. What do you say?

Let's go.

Go get change in case this runs

over three minutes.

I don't think Jack

really wanted to kill us.

I think he's a decent human being.

Jack, it's Sonny Paluso.

It's ten of nine.

I'm sorry you did and I forgot.

I'll call you back after 9.

Please excuse... You sure?

It's okay? I don't mind calling you...

He's right here. He's anxious

to talk to you. Thank you.

Hello. Yes, this is Donald Quinelle.

Yes, Sonny told me.

What do I think?

I'll tell anyone

whatever I want, whenever I want.

I don't wanna hear

what you want.

You'd be the one

knowing your mother like that.

You don't scare me.

Matter of fact, you amuse me.

When I see you, I'll try

not to laugh in your inbred face.

My ass is here

if you wanna whup it.

Just come try and

I'll blow you away like lint.

I'll give you directions, dipshit.

Yes indeed, can you write?

Is anyone there with

an education past first grade?

You just take highway 16.

Yes, that's one and

then five numbers after it.

You drive fast, oyster-brain.

Yes, indeed.

Once you're here, there will be

one less wart on society's ass.

Yeah, f*** you too. Bye-bye.

- Feel better?

- He'll be here tomorrow.

What a relief. Thanks.

No, thank you. God, think of it.

It'll be like my final exam.

Going mano a mano with

only the victor left.

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