The Trouble with Bliss Page #3

You were getting married, and

you didn't even tell me?

It all happened so quick, man.

You could have called.

You could have said, "Morris,

I'm getting married. "

I've known the Cindi

since Sunday.

I met her at church.

Six days ago?

I like to think of it

as a week, man.

A week can be a long time.

Rome was ravaged in less.

The seven days' war changed the

landscape of the middle east.

Yeah. Lot of destruction.

It was the six days' war that

happened in the middle east.

God created the world

in a week.

What's important...

it didn't happen.

I was saved.

I didn't get married.

We had a 4:
00 appointment with

the judge today to get married.

The hottest thing man.

Cindi and I,

really into each other,

like plaid on polyester,

morning, noon, night.

Her place is in Harlem,

so we go to Mama's for lunch,

a pre-wedding meal.

Mama's, best buffet

in the city,

$4. 25 a pound buffet,

except chitlins, which cost more.

Great stuff.

So... at the buffet,

she loads up on rice and beans.

Rice and beans, nothing else.

Not the ribs, not the greens,

not the pulled pork, nothing.

Just the cheap,

heavy stuff, man.

Her meal ended up

costing seven bucks,

all for a plate

of rice and beans,

and I'm the one paying for it.

'Bout to get married

in less than three hours,

and suddenly I saw it all.

Saw the true colors

of the Cindi.

I broke it off then and there.

I mean, how could I marry a

woman who has no problem

paying seven and change,

all for beans and rice?

Get two more?

So, uh...

Who's the 15-year-old girl I saw you with?

Is she stalking you?

Eighteen. Stalking? No.

Why?

'Cause this turning

into a gift or a threat.

- Remember Jetski?

- Jetski?

Guy from high school.

- Kid with the harelip. Spit when he talked.

- No, no, no.

Oh, I know who you mean.

Yeah, Jetski.

The guy's an a**hole.

He used to work at

the movie theater

on 12th street.

He tried to sell me popcorn

he swept off the floor.

The guy's a real a**hole, man.

Well, that girl you saw

is Jetski's daughter.

Your girlfriend

is Jetski's daughter?

- She's not my girlfriend.

- Thank God for that.

Why?

Because if she was, I'd have

to tell you to dump her, man.

My advice would be

to dump her, quick.

So, you're not dating her?

- No, I'm not dating her.

- But you slept with her?

Look, I just met her today.

Yes or no, man,

did you sleep with her?

Yes, I slept with her, but

it's not like you're thinking.

- Really?

- Really. Listen.

I was looking for

a present for daddy.

Dad.

You have something

on your face.

Other side.

Hey, have you listened

to these guys?

They rock, but I want to show

you something even better.

She came on to you.

Yeah, but just let me finish.

Uh...

I want to see your place.

I don't know you.

My name's Stephanie. Stephanie!

But... I don't know

who you are.

You don't like me?

Why don't you like me?

Oh, I like you, I like you,

I just don't know you.

I know you.

I know you, I know

you, I know you.

Dump her, man.

Tell her it was a mistake,

tell her it was an oversight.

You make it sound

like it requires

a congressional investigation.

Basically, man, you had sex.

Two fancy animals

doing what animals do.

An act of nature. I'd get out

before emotions get tangled.

End it before it gets messy.

Morris?

Yeah, it's me, daddy.

No sh*t, it's you.

Come here, Morris.

What the hell are you

doing out so late?

I was out with N. J.

Did you buy the groceries,

or did you take

the money I gave you

and spend it on

something useless again?

I'll get 'em.

No, whoa, whoa, whoa.

How old are you, Morris?

Know what I was doing

when I was 35?

I had a son,

a wife,

an apartment of my own.

A job.

See what I'm saying?

Not really.

I was living.

I understand, daddy.

Oh, no, I don't think you do.

I made choices.

Each and every step of the way,

I made a choice.

It wasn't made for me.

I make choices.

Hmm.

I wonder what your mother would

think about your choices.

Stephanie, listen.

It's...

Hi, Stephanie.

It's...

Hey, Stephanie, it's me.

This is ridiculous.

Hey, Stephanie!

- Twisted Bliss!

- Ah! You missed me, huh?

Jetski, Jetski.

I ought to wax

your tugboat, Bliss!

- I've missed you too.

- Jetski!

- What are you doing?

- Jetski?

Sweet baby Judas, Bliss!

No one calls me Jetski anymore.

I ought to take you

down for that, man.

You know I hate that nickname!

Sh*t!

Twisted Bliss!

How you doin', buddy?

Good.

Yeah? This is a reunion, Bliss.

This is great.

How... how you been?

How's things? Things good?

Yeah.

Well, it's good seeing you.

Oh, man, it's good

seeing you too, man.

You know... You know what?

We should go out

for some beers sometime.

Or, better yet, maybe you could

come over and meet the family.

You'd love my daughter!

What... what are you doing here?

Oh, man, this renovation...

my show.

I'm the foreman, in charge

of this whole project,

which is already screwed,

and we haven't

even begun, but...

that's life, I guess. You

make plans, and life happens.

But... you've got

to get it done, right?

You've got to push through.

Right. You've got

to push through.

Do you remember

the Bloody Eagle brigade?

I tell my wife and daughter

that story all the time, man!

No, I don't.

Aw, come on, Bliss,

the Bloody Eagles!

Remember? You and me,

all the hijinks?

You, Morris the Professor,

coming up with the plan.

Me, the Axe,

getting the job done.

Remember all the sh*t

we used to pull?

Twisted Bliss and the

Bloody Eagle brigade.

Man, we were

famous in high school!

Sh*t!

You remember the time

that we put the, uh,

the black shoe polish

on the toilet seats

in the girls' locker room,

or when you, the Professor,

superglued Mr. Arnold's

chair to his desk?

- You remember that?

- No.

Aw, come on, Bliss.

Actually, no,

I really... I don't.

The Bliss!

And Stevie J. !

The Bloody Eagles!

Remember?

- Sure.

- Oh, I miss that, you know?

All those times, you know?

But...

Now's now, you know?

So, I have a wife,

teenage daughter.

Right.

I make good money, but...

What do you do? Where... where...

where are you working?

I'm between jobs.

Let's. Do. Brews.

How 'bout tonight?

Let's get some cocktails

and catch up...

- Tonight, bro!

- Tonight? Eh...

Thing is, I gotta

watch my cash right now.

Bliss! Why didn't you tell me?

I could have got you on here.

You should have

talked to me last week.

You know what?

Tide over.

Till you get goin' again.

- Oh, no, I can't take this.

- No, no, no, no.

Take that.

One Bloody Eagle to another.

So, you want to see

what this place looks like

before we tear

the sh*t out of it?

Sure.

Bloody Eagle, baby! Yeah!

Oh, yeah.

I haven't been in here

in six months.

Restrictions, permits,

wife suing the husband

for cheating,

husband's suing the wife

for being ugly.

Man.

Divorce.

I don't get it, you know?

I mean, when you say you're gonna

do something, you do it, right?

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