The Whole Ten Yards Page #6

Isn't your heart in between all that?

My heart is broken.

Can you feel that?

Yes. Yes, I do. Yes, I...

It's so broken, Oz!

- Jill!

- Oz!

- I'm so sad. Oz!

- Don't be sad.

What's all this?

First my ex- wife and now my wife- wife.

No, no, no. She just hated her outfit.

- He wants to talk to you for a second.

- No, you.

I've been waiting a long time for this, Oz.

Oz? I think Oz is gonna be out

for a good half- hour, 45 minutes, Jill.

I didn't-- l just...

Jimmy, I...

You do love me, don't you?

Up on your toes. Stand up.

Come on, tippy- time, tippy- time.

- Why can't I stay in here?

- There you go. Sit down.

Read a nice book.

Oh, God!

- Yeah, baby!

- That feels so good!

She just hated her outfit.

Yippee ki- yay!

Yeah!

You believe I fell down the stairs, right?

What stairs?

- Hello?

- Bring me the phone.

- Put Liberace on.

- Is this who I think is this?

- Back from the dead?

- Yeah, Lazlo, skip the formalities.

Call you at 2:
00 and tell you

where we'll make the exchange.

Well, it better be 2 on the dot

or I start cutting off the batch's fingers...

...one at a time! Wouldn't that be nice...

...to get little pieces of the girl?

One, two, three...

...little tiny pieces.

- Drop dead.

- What'd he say?

- He said hi.

- We'll need more firepower.

- I got guns. All you need.

Oz, you stud.

- Here they are. What do you think?

- Oh, my God!

- Oh, my God, you have an H and K MP5K.

- Can we hurry? It's almost 2.

We're gonna be fine.

Oh, wait, can I see this?

- Allow me. I got it.

- Okay.

Gotta be careful with these things.

I got it.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, topnotch.

It's almost 2. We've gotta

load them up and move them out.

- Don't screw around.

- Careful.

- All right.

- There.

I got it. I got it.

Hold on, Oz.

Would you be careful of the fixtures?

I hurt the side part of my head.

Nice guns. Put them in the back seat.

You made her carry all the guns, Oz?

Okay, can we call Lazlo? It's after 2.

Jimmy, you're late.

Bring Cynthia to the Beverly Center.

- Meet at the food court in an hour.

- I wanna talk to my son.

You're gonna have to

hold on a minute.

- Go get Strabo.

- I'll get Strabo.

- I just said that.

- Right.

Go.

Strabo.

Damn it!

I can't find Strabo.

I think he's gone.

- What?

- He's not where we left him.

Hold on.

What do you mean?

I'm holding, I'm holding.

There's just pieces of wood--

- Where the hell is Strabo, people?

- In the trunk.

Okay. How did Strabo

get in the trunk, Oz?

- I don't know.

- Well, get him out.

- Where are the keys?

- In here, with me.

- It keeps getting better.

- Why's he in the trunk?

I don't know! You were

supposed to be watching him!

Tulip!

- Hold on, Lazlo.

- All right, you know what?

No more holding.

Put my son on the phone now!

- Your son's--

- Strabonitz?

- Your son's in the trunk right now.

- The trunk? I wanna talk to my son!

Strabo, your father

wants to talk to you.

What?

- Did you get the gist of that?

- Yes.

You locked my son in the trunk?

No, no, sir. No, sir.

He locked himself in there.

This I believe. Fine.

You have a spare key?

- A spare key?

- No. Car Ranch Rentals only gave us one.

- Negative on the spare key.

- What about a locksmith?

- Do you know of one in the area?

- It's your town, dentist.

You should know where a--

Fine, you know what, Mr. Brain?

The trunk release button,

how about that?

Every car since 1 985 has

a trunk release button.

Find it, open the trunk

and let my boy out.

There's a button on the driver's side.

Every car since 1 985...

We kill them the moment we

see them. In the head.

- I can't find it.

- What kind of piece of sh*t car is this?

- Well, Car Ranch Rentals.

- It's a hitter!

- A hitter. Lazlo's got a hitter on us.

- Did you hire a hitter?

Did I? I don't remember, really.

- Is someone shooting at you?

- Your hitter is hitting at us!

That's bad. My son is there!

- Tell the hitter to stop.

- Your boss says to stop.

- His son's with us. Stop!

- This is Lazlo.

- Stop shooting!

- That's a direct Hungarian order!

Let me find speakerphone.

- Cease fire!

- What's going on? Talk to me.

He's not listening to you.

Well, you should fire him.

- Are you kidding?

- That was me.

- Try not to shoot Oz, honey.

- Yeah.

Let's go, kids!

Get up!

You are in no danger.

If she moves,

put your cane through her eye.

Unbelievable.

- How did you do that?

- Every car since 1 985...

...had a little button right here.

All right, come on out of there--

- What is this?

- That's a dead hostage, Oz.

- That is what that is.

- That can't be good.

No, you're right. That's not good.

It looks like he got shot in the foot.

Who dies from a shot in the foot?

He probably got shot when

the hitter was shooting.

That's really great. Well done, Jill.

Hey, look, sh*t happens.

That's right.

Sh*t happens, to you.

All the time!

You know why? Because you don't

follow the ABC's of killing.

- There's an ABC's of killing?

- Shut up!

How was I supposed to know

he'd climb in the trunk?

- That's a good question.

- I mean--

I know! How about you

just watch him...

...and you don't let him

climb in!

I am a professional marksman.

It's not my job to babysit...

You know what? I think

you have to hit something...

...to count as a marksman.

- Ozzie. Harriet.

Can we stop fighting and go get my wife?

Well, you can just forget about

that, Oz. Cynthia is as good as dead.

- What? Don't say that.

- I am saying it.

She's as good as dead.

We have nothing...

...thanks to Jill. Look at this guy.

- Don't pin this on me!

If I'm a screwup,

what are you doing with me?

You know what?

That's a really good question.

I'm out of here.

Well, you're not going, are you?

Hold on a minute.

You're gonna need the keys.

- Bye- bye.

- I'm serious.

If I get in that car, you're

never gonna see me again.

Careful backing out, hon.

Let's go.

Bag.

Why don't you take your pal Strabo

with you. Remember him?

The Hungarian mobster

that you let die?

He's sorry. He's very sorry!

She's coming back. I mean,

she's gonna come back, right?

- I don't think so.

- Oh, well, this is just great.

What are we gonna do now?

You know what? I'm gonna leave.

You're on your own, Oz.

I thought we were friends.

Well, that's what you get

for trusting a contract killer, Oz.

You son of a b*tch.

You can't do this to Cynthia. Okay?

Not okay. Your darling Cynthia's

not completely innocent in all this, Oz.

- What? What does that mean?

- Sh*t, sh*t, sh*t! Jill took my bag!

So?

- So there was something really important...

...in the other bag, okay, Oz?

Great.

- Hello.

- Dentist, you hung up on me.

- Are you insane?

- Lazlo.

- Hey, there was a button in the trunk.

- That's great news.

- Put my son on the phone, damn it!

- He's...

We're gonna have to

push back that meeting, Lazlo.

No, no. No pushing.

Put him on the phone.

I'm sorry, what? I can't hear you.

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