Think Like a Man Too Page #7

and then I'll just go nose

around the gift shops by myself,

take selfies with

the statues by myself.

I don't know, just like

drink alone in my room.

It might be a crazy night, but

you're more than welcome to join us.

- That's so sweet.

- Yeah, come.

Fine, I'll do it!

I do not wanna be alone

in my room in Vegas.

Okay, Tish.

If you're gonna join the bachelorette

party, I have one cardinal rule.

- You must dress up.

- Yeah.

Yeah, because we have to be

able to get into the club.

So you're gonna have to pull

it together a little bit.

- Like, belt it?

- No.

You know what? I have

a different twin set.

That's rule number two, is that

you can't wear a twin set ever.

Okay.

Get a cute little dress

and some shoes, some heels.

These are the highest heels I'm allowed

to wear, because I have rolling arches.

Well, this is all I brought, so I don't

know what else you want me to wear.

Bebe!

Come, come, come.

Shots up!

To Mike! I'm sending

you off the right way.

I'm the best best

man anybody can have!

You want Ceddy, baby?

Coco, did I ever tell you

that I love a woman in uniform?

Did I tell you I love a woman

without a uniform? Go, Coco!

Dom. You all right?

- Yeah, I'm good.

- You been really down since dinner.

- Seriously, what's up, man?

- Stop babysitting your drink, Dom.

I'm fine, I'm fine.

Oh, yes, you are fine.

I think she likes you.

No, Dom, we can see when the wheels

are turning, man. Come on, outwith it.

Chef Cotillard offered me a job.

- What did he say?

- The Chef offered him a gig.

That's huge, Dom!

- That's a celebration right there.

- Especially if I take it.

- Why wouldn't you take it?

- It's in Vegas.

- Lauren and I live in LA.

- This is a pattern with him.

It's called the Dom Syndrome.

- It's called, he's officially her b*tch.

- That, too.

What are you all talking about?

We talking about the fact that she

dumped you, and you took her back!

- I know what I want.

- Stop!

So, now you telling me you gonna

give up the job of your dreams,

the job that could make

you, for that woman?

- For the woman.

- Spoken like a true...

Do not say it again.

It's actually kinda romantic.

You swimming in the Kool-Aid.

What good is a dream job

if he's gonna be miserable?

Let me ask you a question. Do

you all synchronize your cycles?

There's an app for

that, and I'm serious.

But wait, I got one

question, then I'ma back off.

Do you honestly believe that

she would do the same for you?

Wait a minute!

Good question, Zeke. How

do you do it? Tell me.

Can we have Coco

to the main stage?

Let me help you down. Jesus.

Excuse me, Coco. Thank

you for the dancing.

It's show time. My frat brothers,

Isaac and Terrell? They just showed up.

There they go!

What's up, man? I'm Cedric.

I'm the best man with

the plan. What's up, baby?

Ced, it's not them.

There they go!

Birds of a feather

all flock together.

What fraternity did Mike pledge?

Abercrombie and Fitch Epsilon.

This is Isaac and this is Terrell.

What kinda white woman

names her son Terrell?

I'm just messing with you!

- Chain him up!

- Get it on.

Guys, guys, guys!

Why didn't you think of that, Zeke?

Probably because black men

don't put chains on black men.

White men put chains

on black men. Django.

D is silent. I saw that movie.

Guys, what's a pickaninny?

Guys, you gotta meet my

frat brothers. This is Isaac.

- How are you doing, little guy?

- And this is Terrell, guys.

I've heard so much about you

guys, and none of it is true.

Where are your drinks,

ladies? Come on! What is this?

Is this a Shirley

Temple and a club soda?

- Whose bar mitzvah is this?

- You gotta take this night...

Absolutely. You and me are

gonna die tonight. Let's go.

I told you, you're

gonna love these guys.

Yes!

Come on, Tish!

Girl, those are three-inch heels.

These shoes are killing me.

- Miss Harris? I'm JP, your driver.

- Yes?

Ladies, your ride awaits.

Wait! This is our ride?

It is now!

Wait, you stole the boys' ride?

Genius!

- After you, ladies!

- I love that!

- How are they gonna get around?

- Who cares? That's not our problem.

What the hell is this?

This isn't my ride. I ordered the pimped-out

party bus with a stripper pole in it.

- It's got a pole.

- Cedric, what the hell is that?

Zeke, don't start, man.

I'm liking your gay vibe, man.

Stop. Everybody stop for a second.

Do we look like a group of guys that's

gonna roll to a spot in something like this?

As a matter of fact, you do.

Man, this is Vegas.

I've seen it all.

Are you gonna get in the car? 'Cause

you're getting charged regardless.

Dude, I'm not gonna argue

with you. We walking.

Ced, you know how long

these Vegas blocks are?

- Let's do it!

- I'm getting in the car, bro.

20% gratuity is non-refundable.

The women had not only taken our

ride, they had taken our mojo.

All right, what's on the agenda?

Actually, I have about 10

agendas for us this evening.

I fear them already.

As you should.

Okay, the first one is...

Is someone vibrating?

- You're not gonna answer that, are you?

- Put it on silent.

I have to get this.

Hello, Lauren Harris.

Please hold for Lee Fox.

- Who wants a cocktail?

- Me!

All right.

That food was garlicky.

You guys got any gum?

I think I have something

in my purse, side pocket.

- I'll have one of those.

- I definitely need one.

Me, me, me.

- And a Benadryl, if you have one.

- Pass me one.

Earthy.

- Lauren, it's Lee.

- Hi, Lee.

All I can say is

congratulations. It's unanimous.

You're officially COO of

our global media group.

Did you hear me?

Yes. I'm...

I'm just, I'm stunned.

I'm speechless.

Welcome to the Big Apple, Lauren

Harris. And to the big leagues.

Now go, have fun

with your bridesmaids.

We'll lunch on Monday.

Okay, here we go. There you go.

Are you okay?

Lauren?

- Someone's gonna throw up later.

- You're ready to party.

Let's go!

Vegas!

- Hello, Sofia. How are you?

- I'm wonderful, Zeke.

Guys, guys.

This is the lovely Sofia.

Sofia, this is the boys.

- Hello.

- Hey.

- How's it going?

- Easy. Easy.

- Let's go. Take your time, man.

- Let's give him some space.

So, how are you?

Zeke had to call a time-out after

running into yet another old flame,

who made it clear her life

was much better without him.

Turns out that he was still holding on

to the fantasized memories of his past!

But the real question was, if ladies

no longer saw him as Zeke the Freak,

then who was he?

Let me ask you something, how

did you let that slip away?

I think I was just an a**hole.

Sometimes, you gotta wait

to find the right woman.

The perfect woman. And

that's who you marry.

Zeke ain't getting married!

What the hell is going on?

We here to have a

bachelor party, men!

Can we do that?

Saying the same thing over

and over again to you all, man.

Nobody answer any phones.

- Solidarity, brothers!

- I like that.

Gailzilla ain't gonna

mess up my trip this time.

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