Trailer Park Boys: Countdown To Liquor Day Page #7
something in there
'cause now that I've overruled
the mechanism, it locks from both sides.
Julian, go in position B. You guys,
sorry but you f*** up too much.
I can't believe that worked!
I'm in position.
Stay out here...
Come on!
Grab these boxes.
Get as many kitties as you can.
Shut the f*** up!
Ricky, you're agitating them.
Making them louder.
Keep it down!
Listen to them now. They're
f***ing barking their heads off.
Shut the f*** up!
Shut the f*** up!
You're just agitating them.
Go over to cell block 8.
Get the f*** going.
More of my kitties are over there.
Listen to the f***ing dogs!
You motherf***er!
Someone's coming.
F*** off!
Do you know how much
these f***ing pants cost?
F***, boys...
Get down. Everybody get down!
We gotta keep grabbing...
Security!
Roof! Roof! You f***ing like
the sound of that?
I'm grabbing these cats first.
Julian, the dogs are ruining everything.
They're f***ing this up.
They won't leave me alone.
They're biting my cock.
They ripped my beautiful pants.
Bullshit!
Bubbles, come in.
Get the f*** out of there.
You know how f***ing long
I've had these track pants?
Can't even get them anymore.
Jesus!
You dirty cocksucker.
Ricky, what are you doing?
My God!
Bubbles, I forgot my f***ing pants!
Reverse polarity.
Jesus, boys, which card is it?
I can't remember.
Yo, what the f***!
Let me out!
Listen, sirens!
Guys, get me out of here!
The cops are coming.
We gotta leave you behind.
What?
Sorry, T.
F***...
Sorry, man, they have my f***ing
track pants.
F***!
Don't move! Stay where you are!
Who breaks into the f***ing SPCA?!
Hey, des tu me, Julian?
I don't want to talk to him
right now.
Can I ''aks'' you something real quick?
It's me, the motherf***er
whose DJ's in jail
'cause you f***ed up, b*tch!
Tell me it ain't true, dog.
Tell me what the truth is.
Where the f*** is T at?
Listen, Tyrone's my friend, too.
Where's he at?
He's in jail.
My f***. I feel bad for you right now
'cause I'm about to bip you in the eye.
Bip! Bip!
Okay, everything's my fault.
If you want to hit me
to make you feel better, go for it.
All right. Shut your eyes
and set your alarm clock, b*tch.
'Cause I'll tumble right now.
You try to line up with the jaw--
Wait!
I was in charge.
All right, it's my fault T's in jail.
And you have no idea
how f***ing terrible I feel.
Motherf***er, Bubbles,
tell me that ain't the truth.
It is.
And I'm... sorry.
So you f***ed up.
My DJ's in jail.
That's all because
of your f***ing kitties.
Yeah.
B, you should feel terrible.
What the f*** do you think
is gonna happen with my career, dog?
Another man in jail
'cause of your kitties.
Go on with your stripe-shaped head.
It's whack and I'm not feeling it.
I know it is.
Enjoy your success, man.
Hope it smells nice on the outside
where my DJ ain't.
Wanna see success, Julian?
Keep your eyes on this! Yo!
Keep your eyes on this! Yo! Yo!
Brap! Yo!
What about our food?
Randy, I decided to lay off the food
for a bit, and go on booze.
You were right.
The beer was clouding my judgement.
I made a decision.
I need this to help me get through,
Randy.
You had to have one drink of beer,
didn't you?
You don't understand!
The liquor's calling the shots now,
Randy.
Hey, Randy?
Where are you going, bud?
Mr. Lahey, where did you get
all the money for the liquor?
Randy, to be perfectly honest:
I had to dip into the Cuba fund.
I need the hard liquor
to help me make it through this.
I'm leaving you, Mr. Lahey.
Maybe it's for the best, Randy.
Maybe I need
to drink this out alone, bud.
Randy...
Randy...
Randy!
You can't make it without me, bud!
You'll be back.
I fall
To pieces
Each time I see you again
I fall to pieces
Just me and the liquor now.
Julian, I know
what you're trying to do here.
I know you're trying to get me drunk.
So, what's the big announcement?
Let's just get it out.
I wanna rob a bank.
Rob a bank?
It's not exactly robbing a bank.
It's more like intercepting
money transfers.
They're at the bank.
we go in, take them?
Yeah.
That's robbing a bank.
Julian, that's armed robbery.
I'm not f***ing doing that.
F*** that.
Listen.
We don't need
to use guns on this one.
Ricky, you know how dumb
those armed guards are.
They show up at the bank every Friday
at precisely 5 o'clock...
to collect the money deposits, okay?
All we gotta do is show up
dressed exactly like they are,
in the same uniforms,
with an armoured van,
and it'll be a piece of cake.
Piece of cake.
If it was a piece of cake like that,
why wouldn't people do it every day.
and people would be walking in,
talking piles of money?
'Cause they don't have the balls.
Yeah, well, neither do I.
Listen.
Let's just enjoy our meals, okay?
You guys don't have to give me
an answer right now.
Just think about it. Thanks, boys.
And some more shooters and stuff, too.
Give me the keys. You're hammered.
Give me them.
I'm not f***ing going home yet, guys.
No. A couple more drinks.
Everything's closed.
The f***ing Dirty Burger's set up
on the waterfront.
I heard they're serving liquor. Come on.
Come on, guys!
Come on! We're partying here!
I don't wanna go drinking
at the goddamn Dirty Burger.
Shutting it down yet, boys.
Come on! Let's party here!
Just hang on.
Why?
I don't wanna go out there.
Why not?
No, no:
liquor, drinks. Come on!Let's get some more drinks.
Man-whores, Ricky.
I'm scared of them.
Man-whores can't do anything to you.
What do you mean, scared?
Come on! Liquor, drinks. Come on!
How did you get so drunk?
You know how the liquor works!
Drink it and you're drunk!
Yeah, look at the mob.
Relax, Buds. Come on.
Philly! Hey!
Good, buddy!
We need some burgers
and some drinks!
Come over here, buddy!
Get a burger and a free drink
at the Dirty Burger!
Jacob! Drinks! Drinks! Drinks!
Let's go!
Come on, son! How are you doing?
Good. How are you doing?
Good, man, good.
We're f***ing on her tonight.
Come on, Bubs. Let's get some.
Come on. Jacob.
Let's get that grub up.
Let's have a burger here.
And some drinks, buddy.
Burgers and some f***ing drinks,
Jacob.
Keep your head on a swivel
around here.
Let's go with the drinks.
Come on...
He's sucking the dart.
I'm not f***ing going anywhere.
Are you serious?
I'm staying right here.
and I'm gonna have another
f***ing few drinks.
I'm gonna eat about 4 burgers.
and f***ing shut her down then.
Ricky. I'm not hanging around here--
Boys, boys, boys...
That's Randy.
That's not f***ing Randy...
F***ing Randy where?
F***, he's changing.
What's he doing here, man?
What do you think he's doing
on Man Whore Alley?
He's hooking.
He's hooking for cheeseburgers.
That sucks.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Moving up to the top not by stepping
on but merely by stepping over.
Must be fighting with Lahey.
I'd say so.
He's not a bad dancer, though.
Odd thing to say, Julian.
Who the f***'s the guy
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"Trailer Park Boys: Countdown To Liquor Day" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2025. Web. 24 Jan. 2025. <https://www.scripts.com/script/trailer_park_boys:_countdown_to_liquor_day_22182>.
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