Trouble in Store Page #4

(Woman) Some lady killer!

(2nd woman) Poor Norman.

Norman!

- Don't we look smart?

- Too smart.

Oh, no, don't worry.

You look very nice, really.

Now, where's our big smile?

Yes, she's here.

(# Upbeat big band)

- This is us.

- Oh, no, I wanna go and dance with...

What's the matter with you, clumsy?

- (# Early In The Morning)

- Thank you.

(# Big band)

(# Early In The Morning)

(# Jitterbug)

(# Early In The Morning)

(# Waltz)

(Drum roll)

Now, clear the floor, please,

clear the floor.

(Laughter)

Oh, Norman!

(Sally) Norman!

(Knocking)

Ladies and gentleman,

pray silence for our managing director,

- Mr Augustus Freeman.

- Thank you, Miss Drew.

- My friends, my partners...

- (Laughter)

Yes, that is what you are, partners.

We are here to consider the problems

that lie before us in these difficult times.

- And, if we can, to solve those problems.

- (Staff) Here! Here!

(Freeman) Our question is

how can we lift Burridges to the top?

How can we interest

a public hungry for bargains?

Because that is what the public is today.

And it is up to each and every one of us

to strike a responsive chord,

particularly in these

days of exorbitant taxation.

(Man) Quiet!

(Woman) Shh, quiet!

- Please, not yet, if you don't mind.

- Shh!

At Burridges we'll open a new chapter

on July 1 st with a really remarkable sale,

a sale that will set London alight -

nay, all Britain will marvel at Burridges.

- (Man) Will you be quiet?

- Shh!

In spite of the fact that

in these days of exorbitant taxation...

Our friend seems to think exorbitant

taxation is a matter for jubilation.

(Laughter)

As I was saying, when we are suffering,

and I mean when we are all suffering,

irrespective of class,

humblest to the highest,

we must set ourselves a standard.

We must have a goal.

Value for money, that is our motto.

We must all consider ourselves

crusaders of the counter.

Let no one pour cold water

on our flaming crusade.

Burridges will light a torch

that will shed its beneficent light on all.

Human beings must still buy,

we are not fairies.

We cannot dispense

with the necessities of life.

Whatever our means,

we must still stand up, sit down,

relax and enjoy ourselves.

If the exuberant gentleman...

(AII chattering)

Fresh air might do him good.

One of his colleagues please get him out.

- (AII exclaiming)

- Why don't you shut up?

(Laughter)

This is Burridges. Is that Manpower?

That's us, sweetheart.

I'd like to arrange for some extra staff

for a one-day sale we're having.

Well, we have all the staff you need.

Handsome, clean-limbed gentlemen.

We're organising a Wild West section.

I need someone to play a cowboy.

A cowboy? We have just the job.

Bill here's a graduate

of every university in the world.

The bureau sent me.

- You're who they sent as the cowboy?

- That's me, lady.

You don't look exactly the type.

However, we'll manage.

- Are you fond of kiddies?

- Kiddies? I love them.

We was riding across the prairie

with the sheriff's posse.

We was a-chasing two-gun Pete,

the fastest man on the draw in Texas.

Suddenly I...

Suddenly I sees him riding

out of the canyon,

so I whips out my guns, and two-gun

Cassidy, he and me were buddies,

he turns around to me,

he says, "The best thing you can do

"is you... you have a go at shooting him."

(Children) Gosh!

- My hands is a-quivering.

- I'm your buddy, Bill.

If you get tired,

I don't mind changing places.

- Oh, really?

- No, cos I want to get as near as...

Beat it, little fella,

before I bat your teeth in.

Norman, Mr Freeman wants you.

Norman, I sent for you

but now that you're here,

well, I hardly know what to say.

The position in which I'm placed is,

to say the least, very...

Norman! Oh, Norman.

I had hopes of you, high hopes.

I thought of you...

I looked upon you as my own son,

yes, my own son.

You understand

the difficulty of my position?

I said to myself, "Who can take

a little weight off my shoulders?

"Who can I turn to

to unravel my problems?"

I'm tempted to give you another chance.

Thank you, sir.

- Dressing windows?

- No!

Discipline before everything!

You are fired.

You will get your notice

this very instant. Understand?

Follow me!

Take a letter, Miss Higgins.

"Dear Sir, in view of your deplorable

behaviour and lack of esprit de corps,

"I am therefore compelled to give you

notice of instant dismissal.

"It is with regret that I am dispensing

with your services, however painful,

"but it is a decision

that cannot be revoked.

"However, in view of the service

you have rendered Burridges,

"I'll give you a week's additional salary,

even though you do not deserve it.

"For Burridges is not parsimonious

but a shining example in commerce.

"I will even overlook your taking

of the suit and its destruction.

"We need a staff

worthy of our confidence,

"a staff whose aim in life

is the prosperity of Burridges,

"a staff containing not one black sheep.

"Alas, it was not to be.

"You have tarnished the name of

England's finest store

"by your lack of discipline

and disregard of responsibility."

Miss Higgins, take a reference.

"To whom it may concern, Norman,

er, fill in the name yourself,

"has been in the employ of Burridges

for some considerable time."

(Woman screaming outside)

Get out! Get this man out of here!

- (Mr Dawson) Yes, sir.

- Get him out quickly.

Outside with him. Get out, you...

Can I just have five minutes

to stay goodbye?

Not one second. You can never

come into this store again.

If he shows his face call the police.

But get him out!

- Let me explain!

- Get him out!

- Come on, son.

- Goodbye, chief.

- You certainly like records.

- Records are my weakness.

Thank you, Eileen.

Now, let me see. I just need one more.

Thank you, Mabel.

There, sir, now you have everything.

- So they tell me.

- Sally!

- Is that all, sir?

- For the moment.

- Psst! Sally!

- Will you take them?

No, you can send them to my flat, COD.

Or better still, bring them yourself.

- Sally!

- What are you doing here?

- I must speak to you... alone!

- Not now, I'm busy.

- As I was saying...

- I wanna...

...bring them yourself and we can listen.

- Norman, go away!

- I'll just take the address down, sir.

Here, sir. Orpington Mansions.

Oh, no!

No, no...

- Thank you.

- Be seeing you.

I haven't come here to dilly and dally,

so I'm telling you here and now,

you keep away from my girl.

You keep away from my girl,

else I'll smash your face in.

Why, if it isn't the little fella again.

Did you give the special knock?

- What special knock?

- Let me do it.

- I haven't come here to dilly and dally...

- Where've you been?

- Late as usual.

- Sorry, gov.

Bert here'll give you the gen.

Now, where was I?

Oh, yes, getaway cars.

Mike'll be here at the corner of

Oxford Street and Garfield Street.

Tim will be here as arranged.

Now you all know the drill for dispersal.

- Have you got your Manpower cards?

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