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To Uncle Nutzy's Clubhouse.

That's right! I'm your Uncle Nutzy and boy oh boy,

are we gonna have some big fun today, huh, kids?

Well, let's walk on over and see who's in our Kiddie Korner...

Hi, what's your name?

Billy.

Billy what?

Okay...

Uh oh, you know who that is?

That's right, it's your pal, Bobo the Clown! Yayyy!

Hey, Bobo, wanna play a game?

Okay... look up!

Look down!

Now look at Mr. Frying Pan!

Uh Oh, Bobo fall down go boom!

Upsie-daisey. Say Bobo, what's wrong?

I bet I know. You're hungry, aren't you.

Well, I know just what you want.

Clowns and kids alike can't resist the mouth-watering,

lip-smacking taste of Mrs. Hockenburger's Butter Cookies.

Right, Bobo?

That's right! And hey, mom! They're nutritious, too!

Just look at how much Bobo here likes 'em.

Mmmm, that's good. And don't forget, kids,

there's a nifty surprise inside every box of Mrs. Hockenburger's...

Uh oh! Ha ha ha... Bobo's been eating Yappy's Dog Treats!

That's right! Yappy's Dog Treats,

your dog will love that real

liver and tuna taste...... with just a hint of cheese.

Hi Pamela Finklestein here.

We're talking with Mr. Earl Ramsey.

Now Mr. Ramsey is the President of the

local chapter of the American Gun Association.

Um Mr. Ramsey, would it be correct to assume

that your organization is against gun control?

Gun control is for wimps and Commies.

Listen, let's get one thing straight.

Guns don't kill people... I do!

I do

Yes. Well

Special Bulletin

This is a special bulletin from the U62 newsroom.

Hi, Teri, it's George

Happy Birthday! Hey, how bout if I take you

and you're parents out to dinner?

I'll meet you at Caf Francais at seven-thirty, ok? I love you...

Are you tired of sloppy, cut-rate funerals?

You've tried the rest, now try the best...

The 'Plots R Us' Mortuary Service.

Remember, there's always plenty of free parking,

and don't forget to visit our new salad bar.

'Plots R Us.' Eternal peace... at affordable prices.

Beverly

Beverly Hillbillies

Huh, now lookie here people

Listen to my story

A little story 'bout a man named Jed

You know something?

That poor mountaineer

They say he barely kept his family fed

Now, let me tell you

One day he was shootin'

Old Jed was shootin' at some food

When all of a sudden right up from the ground, there

Well, there came a bubblin' crude

Oil that is Well, maybe you call it black gold or Texas tea

He gonna move next to Mr. Drysdale And be a Beverly hillbilly...

Before you know it, all the kinfolk are-a-sayin'

Yeah, buddie, move away from there

That little Clampet got his own cement pond

That little Clampet, he's a millionaire

Now, everyone said Californie

Is the place that you oughta be

We got to load up this here truck now

We got to move to Beverly

Hills, that is

Swimming pools

Move-a-move-a-movie stars

Lookit that, lookit that

Beverly Beverly Beverly hillbillies

Y'all come back now, y'hear?

Beverly Beverly Beverly hillbillies

George... hey, George...

I finished polishing all the doorknobs.

Is there anything else you want me to do?

Uh, no, Stanley... that's ok.

It's getting pretty late.

Why don't you call it a night?

Aw... do I have to?

Yeah. Go on. I'll see you in the morning.

Okay, I'll see ya.

Hey, George. You know, I was just wondering...

like, like, if you were travelling through outer space.

I mean like going real fast like the speed of light you know,

and all of a sudden you started screaming...

you think that you're brain would blow up?

Hey, guys, I'm trying to work here, do you mind?

No... no, I don't mind, go right ahead.

Do you mind, George?

Would you care to order now?

Oh yah, I'll have the

No, thank you. We'll wait.

Are you sure he knows what restaurant we're at?

Well... I've got some good news and some bad news.

Okay... gimme the bad news first.

Well, given our present financial situation,

compounded by on-going fixed expenses and outstanding invoices,

I figure this station will be flat broke by the end of the week.

What's the good news?

I lied. There is no good news.

I never should have taken this job.

I should have known it would turn out like all the others.

You know, for a short time there,

I just don't know anymore.

Well, at least I've still got Teri.

Bob, what time is it?

Nine thirty.

Oh no...

Hello?

George Newman... you're a selfish, thoughtless, insensitive creep.

And from now on you can forget all my birthdays... because we're through

Hey, kids... where do you want to go?

That's right. To Uncle Nutzy's Clubhouse.

And boy oh boy are we gonna have big fun today.

We're gonna have so much fun...

we'll forget about how miserable we are

and how much life sucks and how

we're all going to grow old and die someday.

I wanna go home.

Shut up, you little weasel.

Okay, right now I'd like to show you one of my favorite cartoons.

It's a sad, depressing story about a pathetic coyote

who spends every waking moment of his life in the futile pursuit

of a sadistic roadrunner, who mocks him and laughs at him

as he is repeatedly crushed and maimed.

Hope you enjoy it.

Hey, where are you going?

I think I need a drink.

You don't drink.

Yeah, I know, but I've been meaning to start.

Well, wait a minute, what about the rest of the show?

Whatch out Mr.Coyote! Oh no... this is terrible...

Hey, Stanley.

Yeah, George?

How would you like your own TV show?

ok.

You're on.

What are you doing? Are you crazy

George, what about?

Bob... it doesn't matter anymore. It's over.

Yeah, we're watchin' it tube... yeah,

I've never seen anything like it... Okay, talk to you later.

Gentlemen! What can I get ya?

Beer.

Blueberry daquiri.

Tell you what George, Let's start fresh.

Start a whole new business.

Maybe we could borrow some money from your Uncle Harvey.

Oh. Right. We just flushed his TV station down the toilet.

I'm sure he'd be happy to lend us money.

So... I guess Teri's never gonna speak to you again, huh?

Hey, I didn't get an umbrella.

Look, everybody he's comin' back on!

Hey!! Welcome back to "Stanley Spadowski's Clubhouse"!

Are you kids having a good time?

Yaaaaaay!

Hey, how bout that cartoon!

That was a weird cartoon, wasn't?

You know, that cartoon, it reminds me of a dream I had last week.When I turned into

a bird with a candy bar head. And then there were these other birds you know,and there all

trying to eat my head and everything.But I got a way from them.Then there was this tree you know,

and there was this weird lizard

I...I wanna show you somethin'! I wanna show you somethin'

This is my new mop. George, my friend, he gave me this mop.

It's a pretty good mop. It's not as good as my first mop.I miss

my first mop, but this is still a good mop.Sometimes you just have to take

what life gives you.Cause life is like a mop andand sometimes life gets full of

dirt and crud and bugs and hairballs and stuff, you just gotta clean it out, you, you gotta

put it in here and rinse it off and start all over again. And Sometimes, sometimes, life

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