Underdog Page #4

to spend time With me after my mom died,

and he's still never home.

We're interrupting with breaking news.

One of our camera crews following police

have stumbled upon

a jewelry store robbery.

The thieves have taken several hostages.

You never see dogs

hurting each other for money.

You never see

people sniffing each other's butts.

Mmm, touch.

As you can see, it is a tense situation.

Hey, you can stop it,

like With Molly and Polly.

No, no, no Way. Uh-uh.

That was an accident.

I had no idea What I was doing.

Well, maybe this is Why you're here.

Look, I was just getting

the hang of the Whole "pet" thing.

- I even cheWed up your iPod.

- You What?

The truth is,

I just Want to be a regular dog.

And I Want to be a regular kid

With a mom and a dad.

But you know What,

life doesn't alWays Work out that Way.

[Sighing] All right.

I'll do it, for you.

But just this once.

There better be something pretty special

in that dog dish when I get back.

You can put the dog door there!

- Whoa!

- Shoeshine!

- Watch out for the fish kite.

- What fish kite?

Ohhh!

I'm good. I hope

I don't look too ridiculous.

- [Sirens blaring]

- [Woman] Oh!

- No!

- Hey, come on.

Don't look at me.

If she hadn't pulled the silent alarm,

you two Wouldn't be getting a time out.

[Man grunting]

- Got it.

- We got it.

Good.

[Woman on police radio]

Unit 31, I hear you loud and clear.

They got all the exits barricaded.

We can't get a man in there.

Hold your positions. SWAT is on its way.

ETA five minutes.

- Did you see that?

- I have no idea.

Whoa!

OW!

- [Gasping]

- [Groaning]

Dogfish.

Excuse me. Why do you

people have pantyhose on your heads?

I'll get him.

I'm going to guess

you're one of the bad guys.

- [Gasping]

- Huh?

[Feedback]

Cad, can you hear me?

That's our dog!

- Grab him!

- OK. Hey, you, grab that dog.

Are you all right?

Are you OK?

Can you hear me?

Come on, little buddy. Breathe.

Hey, guys, back off.

He needs some space.

I'll give you some space.

I said give me some space.

Hang tight, little buddy.

I'll get some help.

- [Guns cocking]

- Evening, officers.

- Whoa, Whoa. Hold your fire.

- The jeWels are safe,

there's a fox passed out on the floor,

and, yes, I'm dressed like a fish.

Keep up the good Work.

[Male reporter] While most

of our city remains skeptical,

the Post is standing by its story

of a dog thwarting

yesterday's jewelry robbery.

According to eyewitnesses, the animal

displayed uncommon strength...

I kneW it.

The police have yet to comment

on this strange report.

- The mayor's office has only said...

- My creation!

They mention me?

Anything about a thief

With amazing hair?

If the reports

of the superdog are true...

You're a superhero.

You're a hairy, four-legged superhero.

You know What?

You're like Superman With a flea collar.

No, no. No, I'm not.

You saved those people.

I know, and it felt good.

But I can't do this. Someone's gonna

recognize me and take me back.

Take you back?

- Uh... take me back to normal.

- Turn you back to normal.

I know. You ever read comic books?

Huh?

Look, it's just a normal guy.

He puts on a cape, takes off

the glasses, and he's a superhero.

- And people fall for that stuff?

- Yeah.

You're a mild-mannered dog

and that's your secret identity.

All you need is a costume.

Well, as long as

I don't look ridiculous.

Am I standing?

I can't feel my legs.

- You're "Bumbledog. "

- Hey, Whoa. No stripes.

They make me look fat.

Who am I supposed to be,

Sherlock Bones?

Count Dogula?

OK. This is Why dogs bite people.

- It's perfect. Underdog.

- Underdog.

Hmm. I like it.

It's my dad's old college sWeater.

But We'll need to make it Work.

What do I do if your dad's

around and I got to...

...you know, take off?

Bark three times. Yeah, OK.

That's going to be our code.

You have to bark three times.

Hang on. Do I bark three times

or say the Word "bark" three times?

- Right. Dog bark. Got it.

- [Buzzing]

You know, I think

that was "dry clean only. "

OW! Watch the ears.

- [Straining]

- It's perfect.

We're still gonna need something

else to get people's attention.

You're right. A flying dog

in a red sWeater isn't enough.

You know, like a catch phrase.

Like, "Up, up and aWay"

or "It's clobbering time. "

[Police dispatcher]

Attention, all patrol units.

We're still looking for a cat burglar

last seen on Eighth Avenue.

[Panting]

- So, you're a cat burglar, huh?

- Huh?

Well, I'm not really a cat person. Woof.

There's no need to Worry.

Underdog is furry.

No, that's not it.

[# Plain White T's:

"Underdog" Rocks]

Police stations have been

flooded With eyeWitnesses reporting

miraculous feats by this phenomenon

Who goes by the name Underdog. Whoa!

There's no need for fright.

Underdog's got bite.

That's not it either.

[Tires screeching]

[Tires screeching]

now that dude knows

hoW to chase a car.

[Man] Ready. Set. Go!

[Burping]

Excuse me. Are you gonna eat that?

I Wanted to have Underdog

on the shoW tonight,

but he's not allowed on the couch.

That's a problem.

[Laughter]

Ooh.

Man, that kung pao chicken was good.

[MeoWing]

Don't tell your cat buddies about this

because I have a reputation to uphold.

- Freak.

- Yup, I thought that was you.

There's no need to fear.

Underdog is here.

Hey, that's pretty good.

I think I'll keep that one.

By executive order,

I proclaim today

"Underdog Day" in Capitol City.

I Would also like to invite

Underdog doWn to the capitol,

provided he's housebroken, that is.

Speak. Speak.

What do you Want me to say?

Not you.

Come on. Come on.

I know you can do it.

- [Barks]

- English.

- [Slurps]

- [Groans]

- [Whimpers]

- Get rid of him.

[Barsinister groaning]

That should be me on the front page,

not that stupid mutt.

I need a sample of his DNA.

HoW do you look in a dress?

[In high-pitched voice]

Somebody, help me!

[Whimpering]

- [Man] Hey.

- [Woman] Oh, my gosh.

- [Man] What's going on there?

- [CroWd murmuring]

Help me! Help me!

I'm a clumsy old Woman!

I thought my WindoW was a door!

There's no need to fear.

Underdog is... moving too fast.

- [Screaming]

- [CroWd screaming]

I seriously need to Work on my landing.

[Screaming]

When old ladies

are falling, I'm not sloW.

It's hip-hip-hip, and aWay I go.

[Relieved voices]

[Man] Way to go, Underdog!

You're safe now, ma'am.

And, in the future,

try to stay aWay from open WindoWs.

Lovely pup. I'm so grateful.

A little treat for you.

Yes. It's called a choke chain.

What's the matter, doggy? Can't breathe?

- Hey, it's you.

- Let's go.

As soon as I knew it was Cad,

I took him for a walk.

Whoa!

Ohhh!

Burns! My parts! Heel, dog!

Please heel! Burns!

You slack-jaWed,

mouth-breathing imbecile!

I should have put strychnine

in your chocolate milk months ago.

Give me one good reason Why

I shouldn't dispose of you right now!

Well, uh... I got this.

My first collar ever,

and I lose it to some guy in a dress.

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