Urban Legend Page #4

then we started going really fast.

I wanted to tell her to stop...

but I just sat there.

And then the other car

lost control and ran off the road.

He was our age.

By the time the ambulance came,

he was already dead.

The courts were lenient with us.

We just got probation.

I was never able to forgive her

for what she did.

I guess I couldn't forgive myself

for not doing something more to stop it.

Oh, my God.

How awful...

for everyone.

I don't know.

I think I should just go home.

Come on. You need to be relaxed,

have some fun and come to the party.

Please?

- Promise you won't leave me alone.

- I promise.

Unless, of course, I hook up with

some cute, little blue-eyed journalist.

Then you might have

to fend for yourself.

- Don't do that.

- Sorry.

Little jumpy?

No, not at all.

I was just thinking.

Me too.

It wouldn't be a bad idea to add a few

extra guards this weekend just in case.

In case what?

Well, after that suicide and

what happened to the Mancini girl...

now I'm having trouble locating another

student, a boy named Damon Brooks.

He's been missing

for some days now.

Missing? He's not missing.

It's the weekend.

He's probably shacked up

in some motel...

with a girl or a guy

or a farm animal.

Whatever.

Weren't you ever 18?

- Not that kind of 18.

- My point is...

I don't want you overreacting.

Don't contact anyone

without my permission.

No parents. No police.

- Is that understood?

- Understood.

Good night, sir.

Go! Come on, boy!

There you go!

There you go!

That's my boy!

I love you!

Hey, listen.

That scream,

that's an actual cry for help...

by a girl being murdered.

- You're kidding me?

- No!

That's why it sounds so real...

because it was lifted

off a 911 tape.

- That's great.

- Yeah.

Hey, you made it!

And already,

I'm starting to regret it.

I'm gonna get something to drink.

You want anything?

- A beer.

- Okay. Be right back.

Stanley Hall's not a legend.

There was one survivor that night.

It makes perfect sense.

Pendleton covered up

Stanley Hall...

and Wexler, so long as

he keeps his mouth shut...

he gets a job for life.

- Why would he do it?

- It eats at him.

And probably every year around

this time, he goes a little wacko.

This year, off the charts.

Well, then, we have to call the police

right away before it happens again.

I already tried.

Dean Adams beat me to it.

They said he warned them

to expect some prank calls tonight.

He even gave them our names.

Look.

I'm sorry I doubted you before.

What?

- Hey.

- What is he trying to do to me?

I'm so scared.

Hey...

listen to me.

Nothing's gonna happen

to you, okay?

I promise.

You don't waste any time, do you?

- Here. It's light.

- Oh, sh*t.

What was all that about?

I screwed up.

Jesus! You trying to give me

a heart attack here?

The building's off-limits

after 10:
00.

Good night to you too.

Hello?

Oh. What?

Hey, Parker.

Let me talk to you for a second.

Look, you might wanna

end this party a little early.

What?

Natalie was right all along.

Say no more.

Everybody, listen up!

No, listen.

Turn the music down.

Listen, everybody.

Paul here, he thinks

we should end the party.

No.

Tell everybody

why they should go home.

There's a killer on campus.

And let me guess.

This killer is offing people...

based on urban legends.

Yeah, that's right.

Well, I've got a legend

that you may or may not have heard of.

This mediocre Woodward and Bernstein

wanna-be realized...

I'm gonna graduate in a couple of weeks

and end up writing gardening tips...

for Martha Stewart's "Living. "

Hang on.

Unless I get a really hot story.

Something that really flies.

I got it.

I'll take advantage

of my homicidal instincts...

and I'll start killing people...

in a trendy,

attention-getting, cover-story...

kind of way...

basing them on urban legends.

Why don't you have another drink?

Maybe you're the one that should leave

and let everybody else have a good time.

Right?

You stay here. I'm gonna go

get some help, all right?

Why do you always

have to be such a jerk?

I was just messing around.

I'm gonna go

to the radio station, okay?

Hey, who's my girl?

That's my girl!

Let's go.

Hello?

You're gonna die tonight.

Oh, really?

I see. The call's coming

from inside the house.

Could it be an urban legend?

Am I right? Hello?

Hey, don't get shy on me

all of a sudden, f*** face.

This is the one about

the baby-sitter, right?

She's getting those scary,

harassing phone calls.

When she traces them back...

they're coming

from inside the house, right?

But aren't you forgetting something?

I'm not baby-sitting any kids.

Wrong legend. This is the one

about the old lady...

who dries her wet dog

in the microwave.

Goddamn, f***ing sick,

motherf***er!

Hootie. F***!

Wanna f*** with me?

Are you sure it's blood?

I'm sure it's blood.

I'm covered in it.

Due to the storm, all units

are presently responding to calls.

- A unit has been called.

- You know what really chaps my hide?

It's the way you pledge

to serve and protect...

and then you don't give a rat's ass

when something really happens.

Hold, please.

I'll do it myself.

This is Paul.

Leave a message.

So let me get this straight.

You guys just tried out this new

sexual position and you're stuck.

- I'm not stuck. He is.

- Just relax and stop clenching.

I saw this happen to dogs once.

It is so humiliating.

All right, you guys,

this is what you're gonna do, okay?

Hello?

Are you guys there?

Help me!

Somebody help me!

Something's happening.

No. She's doing a performance art piece

to commemorate the massacre.

Help me!

Oh, my God!

Please!

She's good. I got chills.

Somebody!

Someone, please!

Help! My God!

Please, help me!

No!

Please, I don't wanna die.

Sasha's dead!

I just saw her and the killer.

All right.

Where did this happen?

The radio station.

Jesus. Come on.

Why did you leave?

I thought I told you

to stay at the house.

Oh, sh*t.

- Where were you?

- Running all over campus.

Trying to find help.

The dean is gone.

I can't find Reese anywhere.

It's dead.

Goddamn storm.

We're gonna get the hell

out of here.

Gotta get off campus

and find some help.

- What are you doing?

- I was just making sure the-

I told you the phones were dead.

I'm on your side.

Let's get out of here.

We'll go into town.

We'll find a phone.

What's happening?

I heard Sasha on the radio.

She's dead.

Oh, my God.

- Are you sure?

- We're out of here.

What?

Hello?

Dean Adams...

this is Reese.

Hello? Are you there?

You have my number. Use it.

Do you smell something?

No.

We should stop at that gas station,

see if the phones work.

Fine.

Be right back.

- Oh, it does reek in here.

- Yeah.

I'm sorry that I acted

like such a jerk about you and Paul.

You two like each other.

Then you should be together.

Like I said, he's all yours.

- Where are we going?

- Back to campus.

Stop!

- What's wrong?

- Someone's after me.

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