Vote for Huggett Page #8

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The Wheatsheaf. Eight fifteen.

Oh, no, no, no, the private bar.

Well, it's... it's quieter in there.

OK. That's a date, then.

All right. Bye-bye.

What do you want?

The key to the spare-parts cupboard.

Oh.

Next time, knock before you come in.

All right.

You mean you offered this fellow Gowan 650

for that miserable little rubbish dump?

- But, Mr Hall, you said you wanted it.

- Not at that price. It's outrageous.

You told me to go 50 higher

than the last bidder, so I did.

He said he'd had an offer of 600.

He was lying. Fantastic.

You must have been out of your senses.

Where did this happen?

- In The Wheatsheaf.

- I see.

- I only had one drink.

- One too many.

Well, go back and get out of it somehow.

I'm not paying that.

Well, how? He's bringing the deeds round at ten.

Well, you can tell him to take them away again!

(Telephone rings)

Hello? Hall and Company.

- It's Gowan.

- Oh, yes, Mr Gowan. Bentley speaking.

Now, about that land. I'm afraid it's a no-go,

old chap. I've got a better offer.

What?

Don't say I didn't warn you.

I told you it was worth 750.

- He's sold it elsewhere for 750.

- Ask him who bought it.

Well, now we've lost the toss, I suppose

there's no objection to telling us who bought it.

OK, if it's gonna give you any pleasure.

A bloke by the name of Christie.

Christie, eh?

Oh, no, no. Nothing. Nothing at all.

Yes, thanks. Goodbye.

- Christie?

- The Huggetts have done well for themselves.

Not to mention Wilson and Lever - blast them.

Has Huggett been in with them all along?

Well, the way things have turned out,

it looks like it.

And it'll look like it to the honest electors

of Strutham when I tell them about it.

- You're going to expose him?

- Exactly.

Get Christie on the telephone.

Tell him I want to see him.

I'll show this Mr Huggett where he gets off.

Ah, Huggett. I thought we'd find you here.

Alderman Hall would like a word with you.

- With me, sir?

- If you don't mind.

- Of course not, if Mr Campbell doesn't.

- I'll er... leave you together.

HALL:
Thank you.

I promise I won't keep him more than a minute.

That's quite all right. Take your time.

- Won't you sit down, Mr Hall?

- No, thank you.

What I've got to say can be said in a minute.

Your secret's out.

- What secret?

- You know perfectly well what I mean.

I don't want a scandal,

so I'm going to give you an easy way out.

Withdraw from the election now,

and I'll say no more about it.

Are you crazy? I've got a meeting tonight.

Exactly. I shall be there.

In the front row.

And if you have the impudence to turn up,

it will be my painful duty

to ask you one or two very awkward questions.

- Such as?

- Why you suggested a lido,

when you knew the only land available

was owned by Lever and Wilson and your wife.

Why your wife sold her plot to Lever

for ten times its worth.

My wife hasn't sold anything to anybody.

Why do you take the trouble to lie? I've seen

Christie. He's shown me the documents.

I've seen your wife's signature on it, and my

guess is, it's tucked away in Lever's safe now.

Well, I can only say that I haven't the faintest

idea what you're talking about. But I'll find out.

You'd better. And you'd better have

your withdrawal in before the meeting tonight.

- That won't be necessary.

- All right. Don't say I didn't warn you.

- Are you quite sure you never signed anything?

- Yes, I think so.

Now, what do you mean, you think so?

Either you signed it or you didn't. Is it yes or no?

- Yes.

- You mean yes, you did?

No, I mean yes, I didn't. I mean, no, I didn't.

- Are you sure?

- Yes.

That's all I want to know.

- Joe, where are you going?

- Out.

- But you haven't had your supper.

- Got no time. I've got things to do.

Oh, dear.

I do hope he won't do nothing he'll be sorry for.

Mum, who was it wanted you to sell the land?

Everybody. First it was Mr Christie.

Then it was Mr Bentley.

Then it was Diana Gowan and Grandma.

They was all on at me.

Gowan? I bet he knows something about this.

I'm going to see him.

Susan, not now! You haven't had your supper.

No time for supper. I've got things to do.

- Oh... it's you.

- Oh, hello, Peter. I've got to see Mr Gowan.

- Well, you can't.

- Why not?

- He isn't here.

- Well, is Di in there?

They're both away.

Gone on a week's holiday. I'm in charge.

Oh, blast! Well, when did they go?

This afternoon. What's all the fuss about?

Your dad was here asking for him, too, earlier.

Well, Alderman Hall says that Daddy

and Maurice and Mr Wilson are in a plot

to make money out of the land for the lido.

And he says that Mum has sold the land

to Maurice, and Mum says she hasn't, and I...

Peter, you're not listening.

- I say, look at this.

- What is it?

- See that writing, on the blotter?

- Yes.

- What does it look like to you?

- I can't see. It looks like a signature.

- Got a mirror?

- Yes.

Ethel Huggett. Ethel Huggett. Ethel Huggett.

- Well, what does it mean?

- Someone's been forging your mother's name.

That's what it means. And I know who did it.

- Who?

- Dear little Diana, of course.

She was writing something the other day.

You know how she is.

She can hardly write her own name,

much less anybody else's.

Peter, I'm going down to the office to see

if that deed's in a safe. Will you come with me?

If you want me to. I've got my bike outside.

Good.

Oh, wait a bit. Look, I must go back.

I must use the phone.

- Wait outside.

- Well, hurry.

(Squeaks) Ahem...

(Deep voice) Mr Lever, this is a friend.

If you want to prevent a burglary,

I should get down to your office right away.

(Ends call, dials again)

(Horn)

This is Peter Hawtrey.

I've got some very interesting news for you.

(Tearfully) I don't know what's going to become

of us. We shall all end up in prison. You'll see.

Course you won't.

You haven't done anything wrong, have you?

- No.

- Well, there you are.

Now, you go and get dressed,

and we'll go to the meeting.

- Oh, no, I couldn't!

- Daddy's expecting you to be there,

and we've got to back him up, haven't we?

- I suppose so.

- Well, go on, then.

MAN:
I wonder how long we're gonna wait...

How much longer?

Er... (Bangs table)

Ladies and gentlemen,

I'm sorry that Mr Huggett has been delayed,

but he'll be with us very soon now.

He's on the way.

And since a good thing

is always worth waiting for,

I know that you'll all want to stay and hear him.

In the meantime, I hope that you'll allow me

to act as... a very unworthy deputy for him.

Mr Chairman, may I ask a question?

Certainly. Certainly, if you wish to, yes.

Is... is Mr Huggett still standing for the council,

or has he withdrawn his nomination?

I beg your pardon, sir?

I thought the question was perfectly clear.

Is Huggett still standing for the council,

or isn't he?

Well, of course he's still standing.

- Are you sure of that?

- Perfectly.

- Well, why isn't he here?

- I've already told you: he's on his way now.

- In that case, may I ask another question?

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