Wanderland Page #4

your problem, Alex.

Come over here.

Sorry.

So you said

3 Ponds Lane, right?

Well, look at this. The GPS

brought you to 3 Ponds Lane here,

but what you really wanted

is 3 Ponds Road in Townhampton.

There's a 3 Ponds Lane

and a 3 Ponds Road?

Yeah, it could be

quite confusing

if you don't know

where you are around here.

But don't worry.

You just go back on the ferry,

you turn here, you turn

here, and you're all set.

So I'll give you this map.

Oh, no,

I can't take your map.

Hey, please, there's nothing

like a good old paper map

to get you back on track.

Thanks, Dan.

Is this yours?

Oh, uh, yeah.

No, thank you.

That must have fallen

out of my pocket.

He sees

Dr. Positano, Dan.

Does he?

Shh-shh-shh-shh.

Why do you say that?

Do you guys know him?

Oh, of course.

Dr. Rock Positano

is the foot whisperer.

Hey, did you go

to his party?

No. There's a party?

[Dan] Yes, yes.

Saturday night.

All his patients

from around here go.

It's supposed to be

a real gas.

Really?

Yes. Actually,

give me the map.

It's not far

from your beaten path.

It's right here on...

Fresh Pond Road,

right there.

I'll draw it

right here for you.

There you go.

Thanks.

Hey, hey. Before you leave,

would you like to see

some pictures of our suns?

- Oh.

- Hmm?

Yeah. Yeah, I'd love that.

- This was Capri.

- Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Um, the sun rising

on our 40s.

[Sandy] Hmm.

Sun over the Sahara.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

[banjo music playing]

- Hi.

- Hey.

I just need

to get back across.

Sure. It'll be $1.

A dollar?

Remember, I was in

the car before?

Oh, I remember you.

Oh, great. So I already

bought a return trip.

For the car.

No, actually, for me,

in the car.

Where is your receipt?

In the car.

Bingo.

Come on, man.

It's $1.

Mr. Fancy Pants.

Oh. Oh!

Hey!

Hi!

Hey.

Sorry, I don't give

handouts to beggars.

Oh, no, no,

I'm not a beggar.

Is there any way

that I could get in the car

and ride across with you?

No, I don't feel

comfortable with that.

Okay. Why not?

Because how do I know that once

we're in an enclosed space,

your maleness

won't take you over?

Because it won't.

It's a three-minute trip.

Male lust is swift

and unpredictable.

Okay, look.

- Can I have a dollar then?

- I knew it.

Come on! Oh, come on.

[instrumental music playing]

Here's your

f***in' dollar, ass.

Hey! Hey!

Hey, get back here.

- Oh.

- Get back! Get back here.

- Get back! Get back here!

- Sh*t!

Get back here!

Get back here!

Get back here!

You've got to be kidding me!

Jesus! You serious?

Stop chasing me!

It was just a dollar!

Get back here!

Jesus Christ.

Son of a b*tch is fast.

[woman] Hello?

Hello?

Is anybody out there?

You've got to be kidding me.

I'm helping out a friend.

He's been depressed lately.

- Watch that rock.

- [yelps]

- Are you okay?

- Yep. Yep.

What's your name?

- Alex.

- I'm Hope.

I somehow got

turned around tonight.

I've been to Raphael's

tons before.

Shouldn't he have come

picked you up?

Oh, nah. Raphael can't see

very well at night.

And watch

the loose gravel, okay?

Thank you.

Yeah, but still, he could have

called you a cab or something.

Nah, I like

getting there myself.

And we wouldn't

have met, right?

I mean, is it safe for

someone like you to do this?

[laughs]

What?

I started going blind

when I was three, Alex.

Jesus.

Did you understand

what was going on?

Well, my dad said it was like

I was in this boat,

and I'd fallen out of it

into the water,

and the boat

was never coming back.

- Rock.

- Thanks.

So he told me I needed

to learn how to swim.

Not having a boat

didn't make me weaker.

I didn't need a boat

to get across the ocean.

Sounds like a great dad.

He was, Alex.

He died when I was six.

Yeah, my dad died

when I was young too.

Was he sick?

No.

No, he was swimming

at the beach.

It was a rip tide.

Nothing we could do.

Whoa. You were there?

Yeah.

Yeah, I was there.

Jesus.

How do you ever get over

a shock like that?

Well...

[soft instrumental

music playing]

That's real bonding.

[owl hooting]

[jazz music playing]

Hi.

Shoes off.

Oh. Oh, sure.

Sorry, this is

a private party, sir.

This way.

[indistinct chatter]

[announcer]

Ladies and gentlemen,

the doctor is in.

Take one step

Look around

The world has changed

With just one bound

What you thought was lost

Is found

Right on the ground

With you

Feeling tired

Of moving slow

Trying to reach

Some distant goal

Perhaps sing at balls

Make you go anywhere

You're supposed to go

Maybe there's a reason why

We only step so far

Each footprint is a journey

Your feet

Are shooting stars

Shooting stars

Shooting stars

Your feet

Are shooting stars

Take those steps

Left, right, left

Your feet

Are shooting stars

Wrong turns only

Lead to right

Lure him alone

He'll keep you up at night

Travel by

The speed of light

And miss the light

Around you

Get above that mountaintop

A pot of gold

At a candy shop

Look around

At what you've got

Your dreams

Already found you

Maybe there's a reason why

We only step so far

Each footprint is a journey

Your feet

Are shooting stars

Shooting stars

Shooting stars

Your feet

Are shooting stars

Take those steps

Left, right, left

Your feet

Are shooting stars

Take one step

Look around

The world has changed

With just one bound

What you thought was lost

Is found

It's always been

Within you

[applause]

Thanks.

Hey. Rock Positano.

Alex.

What did you think

of the show, Alex?

It was great, really.

"Singing reflects

a state of balance.

It is the audible resonant

reality of our existence."

John Lennon said that.

Guy was a genius.

You know about him?

About John Lennon?

Obviously I know

about the Beatles.

[laughs] Professor John Lennon.

Emporia State University.

Oh! Okay. Yeah...

I mean, did you think I'd...

Come, have a seat.

Okay.

I appreciate you

fitting me in, Dr. Positano.

Please, call me Rock.

So, what have you

got there, Alex?

Let me see.

Some plantar fasciitis

along the plantar medial heel.

Not too severe.

Not yours.

No. It belonged to a woman

I met on the beach.

She invited me

to the party, and...

I think it was your party.

You think?

She didn't tell you?

No.

I told her

I didn't wanna go.

Why?

Because I always say no.

Strange thing for you

to just pick up, you know.

I know.

But there was a...

There was a connection

between you two.

I don't know. It was...

We only talked

for like five minutes, but...

But?

I just should have said yes.

So this was

your second chance.

Well, I put names

on the bottoms

but it's rubbed off.

I mean...

I make thousands of these.

I have no way

of finding her from this.

Okay.

Put 'em up.

- Excuse me?

- Your feet.

- Ah.

- On my knees.

Do you know how hard it is to get

an appointment with the Rock?

Doll will be good

to us, Alex.

Mm-hmm.

Oh.

Huh.

Well?

Nice arches.

You ran track at school.

Uh, cross-country.

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