Weekend Page #6

(Glen) Well, trust me they like it, as long

as we don't shove it down their throats.

(Russell) OK, well, why should I

just shove it down their throats?

Because they shove it down our throats

all the time, being straight...

straight story lines on

television, everywhere,

in books, on billboards,

magazines, everywhere.

But, oh, the gays, the gays...

(Gasps) We mustn't upset the straights!

Shh, watch out, the

straights are coming.

Let's not upset them, let's

hide in our little ghettos,

let's not hold hands, let's

not kiss in the street, no.

We have the chance to

make up our own sh*t,

we can grow our own garden and

put little flowers and pansies

and gay gnomes in it and water

features and water sports and slings,

but no, everybody wants to concrete the

f***er over and get a gas barbecue.

You're obsessed with concrete.

You're absolutely obsessed with the stuff.

But why would you want concrete when

you can have whatever you want?

I'm not saying people shouldn't

forge relationships,

all I'm saying is that we don't

need someone to sanction it,

- to make it legitimate, to make us respectable.

- Yeah, heaven forbid.

And don't tell me that people

get married because of love.

People get married for the same reason

that they buy a house or buy a dog,

to tie them down so that they go, "Oh, no,

we couldn't possibly go away this weekend."

"Who'd look after Buster?

Couldn't possibly leave Buster alone."

- Glen, maybe sometimes people just like dogs.

- And it's not even proper marriage anyway.

In America they went out on the

streets and fought for equal rights,

and over here people are

too busy on f***ing Grindr

or shaving their arses to be able to do anything.

Where's their fight?

It's a fight, isn't it, for something

that you don't believe in.

- That's not the point.

- Well, it is, it is, kind of.

A man standing up

with another man,

in front of everyone saying that, "I

love you and I want to get married,"

I think that's a pretty

f***ing radical statement.

I mean, standing up and saying, "I want

to spend the rest of my life with you,"

when everybody's looking

at them, saying...

that it's wrong, it's

disgusting, it's sick.

I mean, people say that we should go to

hell for this - f***ing go to f***ing hell,

I mean, why do people f***ing say

that, do you know what I mean?

So, actually, standing up and saying,

"You know what, I love you,"

"and f*** you and f*** you, I don't give a

f*** what you f***ing think, I don't care."

- That is pretty f***ing amazing.

- But why do people have to feed into the system?

Oh, my God, now you sound like

a f***ing teenager, Glen.

I mean, earlier, you asked me

if I thought that people got married

because they love each other.

- Yeah?

- Right, OK,

well, maybe they

do, maybe they do.

And, yeah, maybe...

f***ing maybe it is stupid,

and maybe they will get divorced

and all that kind of sh*t,

but f***ing who cares?

Why does it bother

you so much, Glen?

Why does it bother you that maybe

two people f***ing love each other

and they want to get married

and they want a relationship

and they just want to be happy?

Do you want another line?

Why do you think it's gonna

be so different in America?

Because it will be.

- Have you ever been properly alone?

- Of course I have.

I mean properly. Alone.

Sat in a hotel room in Portland all

by yourself, no friends, alone.

- Yes.

- I don't believe you. I don't believe you.

In a week you're gonna

go completely mental.

Of course you are, because

you're gonna have no friends,

and you're gonna compromise because that

is what people do, they compromise,

because nobody, f***ing...

f***ing nobody,

nobody can deal with

being by themselves.

I don't want to compromise.

There you go again.

You're condescending me, it's like

you're always f***ing attacking me!

- I'm not attacking you.

- You f***ing are!

I mean, it's like you want

everybody to think independently,

but you want everyone to

f***ing agree with you.

I mean...

why can't you just understand that

some people just want to be happy?

(Glen) Are you happy?

I'm fine.

You know what, yeah, things

could be f***ing better.

Easier.

But I am absolutely fine.

Sure you are.

- Don't you f***ing dare.

(Glen sighs)

- Don't you f***ing dare presume...

- Calm down.

...that you understand me.

You think just because I can't...

You think just because I can't

walk around the f***ing streets

holding hands or talking to my mates about

f***ing sucking c*cks, that you know me.

- No, I don't.

- I can see it in your eyes, Glen,

I can see it, that you think...

(Sighs)

...you think I'm a f***ing idiot

because I want a f***ing relationship.

- Did I say that?

- But the thing is, Glen...

the thing is, Glen, I think

that you want one too.

I think you would make

an amazing boyfriend.

That's not what I'm f...

That's not what I'm saying.

- I don't...

- It's not about me. F*** me.

I don't want one.

I don't believe you.

I don't believe you.

John has f***ed you

up, because...

Let's stop this now before we go

somewhere that we don't want it to go.

...because he's cheated on you...

- You don't know nothing about me and John.

You don't know nothing about how I feel,

about whether he cheated on me or not.

And, for the record, I don't give

a sh*t that he cheated on me.

I give a sh*t that he was a

f***ing liar and a f*ggot

and he couldn't stand

up for himself.

Couldn't stand up for...

Glen, he was beaten up in a f***ing park...

- Look, look, look.

...because he was gay!

Maybe if it's easier if I tell you

that I'm brokenhearted, but I'm not.

I don't want...

I can't have a

boyfriend right now.

And that's all there

is to say about it.

Now, I really don't want

us to fall out about this.

Really, I don't.

I need to go to the toilet.

I think I need to

go to the toilet.

(Door locks)

Oh, f***.

(Breathing deeply)

(Music playing, muffled)

(John Grant:
TC And Honeybear)

Before that Honeybear

had given up

He felt so sad and lonely

Then one night he

looked up and he saw

He saw his one and only...

(Glen) I thought I

heard a firework.

(Russell) It's probably

just some kids.

(Glen) Probably.

(Russell) I'm really

sorry, just...

I was a dick. Sorry.

(Glen) It's all right.

Probably too much coke.

(Russell) Yeah.

(Glen) Blame it on the drugs,

I always say. (Chuckles)

(Russell) Talking of drugs,

this is my secret

reserve of master kush.

Would you like some?

(Glen) Thank you.

(Glen) Swap?

Thank you.

(Glen grunts)

(Sighs)

I think... Stop. I'm gonna come.

(Glen) Shhh.

(Russell) You know, when I'm...

when I'm at home I'm absolutely fine.

Fine?

Yeah.

Completely.

I don't...

I don't care and I don't

even think about it.

I just...

I'm not embarrassed, I'm not...

I'm not ashamed, and I don't...

I don't want to be straight.

You know, not now anyway.

I'm happy. I'm happy being gay.

But?

It's when I go outside,

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