Weirdsville Page #3

Synopsis: Royce and Dexter are two slackers who live in the strange little town of Weedsville. When Royce's girlfriend Matilda overdose's on their stash and dies, they decide to bury her in an abandoned Drive-In theater. Things get out of control when they discover Satanists performing a ritual sacrifice right where they were going to bury the body...
Genre: Comedy, Crime, Drama
Director(s): Allan Moyle
Production: Magnolia Pictures
  3 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.5
Rotten Tomatoes:
56%
R
Year:
2007
90 min
Website
60 Views


and get Todd into the freezer!

What?

I forgot the key.

What are we supposed

to do, huh?

Stick him

in the meat grinder?

Excuse me, um, sir!

Shut up!

Abel.

Abel!

Seamus forgot

the freezer key!

Here's Royce's address.

Put Todd in the hole

those two imbeciles dug.

Let's go find the girl.

Do you think you can

handle that?

Just-- Can you not

hold him like that?

Jesus Christ!

You know what?

Watch your mouth,

little missy!

I know!

I know, okay?

I've had enough.

I'll wash your mouth out

with soap!

Can't you help me carry him?

Just shut up!

Okay.

Okay.

Sorry.|

God, that was

a Goddamn miracle

how those weirdos

brought her the f***

back to life!

She wasn't dead, man.

Yo, she had no pulse.

She had no pulse.

No.

Have you ever, in your life,

taken someone's pulse?

No.

Me, neither.

And I'm telling you,

those psychos didn't raise

anyone from anything.

Man, I know what I saw.

I know what I'm seeing now.

Wha--

What's, uh...

What's going on

with your gack?

You want it?

Yeah.

Why?

I quit.

Shut up.

No, I mean, I mean it.

Shut up.

I'm serious.

Shut up.

You shut up.

Shut up!

You shut up.

Shut-up.

No, seriously, please.

I mean it.

I kicked.

Where do you think

I was all week?

You okay?

F*** it, f*** it,

f*** it.

We should call the cops,

all right?

Not from here!

No?

They could trace it.

That is some CSI sh*t!

Yup.

Always on our asses!

Those bastards!

Where the f*** is my dope?

I swear, I'll cut off

their thumbs!

I'll cut off their thumbs!

How was it?

You know, kicking?

Oh, dear...

It was like puking rusty gears

and shitting razor blades.

Ew, man.

Yeah.

So you really are--

You kicked for good, huh?

Well, I'd twist off

a puppy's head

for a taste right now,

but yeah, I'm kicked.

Sh*t.

Hey, good evening, lads.

I don't think

I introduced you

to my friend Garry.

Oof!

Oh!

Ooh!

I don't blame you, Dex.

You're the quiet,

introspective one.

Royce, sadly,

is the idea man.

Listen--

Shut up.

I just got back

from your apartment.

Now, correct me

if I'm wrong,

but it seems to me

like someone had

one hell of a party

in there.

I can explain.

Shut up, Royce!

I'm talking now!

Look at you two, hmm?

You ever heard

of a f***ing shower?

You know what

your problem is?

You are a disgrace

to this country.

In Canada, you can have

anything you want

if you're willing

to work for it.

You two couldn't

hold down a f***ing job

if you were tied to it!

So, this is what I want.

I want the 1, 700

you owe me in cash,

plus the cash value

of the drugs

I kindly entrusted you.

That's fair.

Plus $600 bullshit tax.

Or you can forgo the tax

and, uh, Garry here

can drop this stone

on your face.

Which is it?

Bullshit tax!

Bullshit tax.

Good choice!

Add it up for them, Garry.

in cash, by last call.

Oh, man.

"Oh, man. "

F***ing, "Oh, man.

Oh, f***ing man".

Okay.

You're right. Okay?

I'll be there

after my game.

We're curling tonight.

He's my skip.

Let's go.

Playoffs tonight.

You know what, Garry, f*** it.

Yeah, let's show them.

Throw the stone.

Hey, hey, hey!|

Take it easy!|

Come on.

You and Mattie blow through

that whole stash?

Huh?

Did you and Mattie

blow through

that whole stash?

No, dude, of course

I saved some.

You know she's a hog.

Give it to me.

Oh, come on, man.

Just... give it to me.

Don't do it, Dex.

Come on, man.

You were just talking about

how hard it was to kick, dude.

F***.

Hey, Dex.

Hey, Mattie.

How you feeling?

Huh.

I think I was dead.

Yeah.

I saw my mom.

She was so sad.

She showed me hell.

It was so f***ed up, Dex.

This voice

as big as the sky went...

"Matilda. "

Oh, Mattie,

what are you doing?

What are you doing?

No, seriously.

What am I doing?

What are you doing, Dex?

I'm sorry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Who isn't?

You still going

to call the cops?

Nope.

Where are we going?

We got work to do.

I have been

Terrified

By the thought

of losing you

So very terrified

By the thought

of losing you

I've been petrified

Hey, man, look.

This tree's still

got a leaf on it.

Yeah.

It's nice.

Shall we?

Opa!

O-- Okay!

Was that completely

necessary?

Don't be a dick.

Where does

the other one live?

I don't know.

Why don't you check

the Yellow Pages

under "junkies"?

Hey, take it easy!

What's the big deal?

We're robbing

these people.

Let's not add insult

to injury.

Keep it dark, please,

just in case.

Yes, master... bater.

Hey, listen to this.

"Though Taylor's I. P. O.

has scored him millions,

"his true passion

is the New Age Center

he started after settling

in Weedsville in 1977. "

What a crazy f***.

Hey, man,

I know this place.

Yeah, I took yoga there.

You took yoga?

Yeah, man.

It enhances the high.

How'd that

work out for ya?

I got kicked out.

What for?

Sporting wood.

Listen to this.

She wrote a song.

... sayin'

you shouldn't try

I really think

you should try-yi-yi

I tried to fight it

But now I'm on my knees

It's not my fault

If I can't hold on

I'm not that strong, no!

It's not my fault...

Beautiful voice.

Maybe she'll sing for Lucifer

when she meets him.

Man, we should have gone

to my place first.

I got flashlights

and me and Matilda,

we drew up a plan.

You drew up a plan?

Do you keep it

in your evidence bag?

Yeah, bingo.

That's it.

Here?

Yeah, man,

right in there.

Sh*t.

Sh*t.

Is it locked?

I can crack

that knob, man.

Have at it,

knob-cracker.

Ready?

Yeah.

Hey!

Oh.

Oh.

All right, man,

let's get this open

before that kid wakes up.

Right.

What kid?

How'd you knock him out?

Oh, man, I hit him

with the-- that elf thing

that we broke in with.

Gnome.

Yeah, okay.

Whatever.

What is it, a leprechaun?

Gnome.

You know what I mean?

Like the...

the Smurf thing that we--

I hit the br--

hit the window with?

What Smurf?

Gnome.

What are you saying, man?

You're stoned.

You keep saying "no".

It's been a while.

It was a leprechaun.

"No. "

Elf? "No. "

What's this?

The Taylor house.

Come on.

There it is.

Yeah, there it is.

You going to open it?

Me?

Yeah, you're the one

that knows the combo.

I didn't memorize it, man.

I wrote it down.

You know, I think

you might've mentioned that

before we broke In here.

Oh, I didn't think of it.

You didn't think of it?

No.

We have a safe to crack,

the contents of which

could save our lives,

and you didn't think of it?

I know, that sucks.

Yeah, that sucks.

That sucks.

Start the night

burying a body

and it's usually

right down the hill

from there, isn't it?

Oh, that's so true.

So true.

Ow!

It's a sign.

It's gotta be a sign.

Maybe it's a coincidence.

Lucifer sent them

to the drive-in

to test our faith,

Seamus,

and now we've

been rewarded.

Three of them,

three of us,

same configuration

of men and women.

That's no coincidence.

Technically,

there were four of us

that went

to the drive-in--

Are you doubting?

No.

Doubt is the enemy

of faith, Seamus.

Rate this script:4.5 / 2 votes

Willem Wennekers

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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