Who Made The Potatoe Salad? Page #4

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No, no, no. I'm Michael.

Hey, Shaft, who is it?

It's for June Bug.

Well, let him in, dipshit.

You ordered the mail-order bride?

Me? No, no, no...

Yes, yes, yes, we must, how do you say?

Make love.

- Make babies.

- No, no, no. We don't make no babies.

- Yes, yes.

- Hey, Shaft.

I can't handle... Hey, hey.

Hey.

That is for June Bug.

Don't just stand there.

What, you waiting for her to kiss you?

Go knock on the goddamn door, boy.

No, I was just about to do that,

I was just about to do that.

- F*** you.

- It's Michael.

- Hell you want, nigga?

- You got company.

Is she pregnant?

- It's a mail-order bride.

- Hell, no!

Damn! You fine in person and

just like you are in your picture. Sh*t!

I'm Lupe. I'm the mail-order bride

from Santo Domingo.

Lupe el...

- El hello ho.

- You ordered the mail-order bride?

I sure did. Let me look at you,

I wanna see you. Dig it. Oh, snap.

June Bug, June Bug.

Knock it out of the park.

Told you I was gonna make something

of myself, Daddy. Babies. Yeah, yeah.

Come here.

Watch them, they the Feds. Yeah.

Okay.

Come here, I need you.

I wrote the book

Dominoes for Bloodback in '76.

Dominoes for Blood?

Dominoes for Blood,

I wrote that back in '76, hell of a book.

- Hell of a title that is.

- Hell of a book.

- That done put it on them.

- Up this f***ing bullshit.

Lay it down.

Twenty-five, motherf***er.

Now if you gonna keep sticking

your ass out there like that,

somebody gonna confuse

your masculinity.

Okey-dokey, pokey.

What the f*** are you laughing at?

It's your play, young blood.

And you better come with some sh*t.

- Man, relax, take it easy, dawg.

- Nigga, are you ovulating?

- Go on, play, dawg.

- Play it, man.

I got this, I got this, I got this.

Fifteen.

- Sure is.

- Fifteen.

That's a 15, if ever I saw a 15.

The big one and a fiver.

Come on, Ashley baby,

I need you to come help me

with the food, come on.

Mama, I was kind of enjoying myself

with the boys.

Girl, come on here,

that boy ain't going nowhere.

All right meet me over there.

Mmm-mmm-mmm!

Look at the swing on that back porch.

That girl got a ass like a horse.

She sure got a hell of a future behind her.

Yeah, but she walk like her p*ssy

ain't no good.

Not to me.

What she need to do,

try one of them ninja trois with me.

Get a second opinion.

- Now, you thinking about mnage trois.

- Whatever, nigga.

No, no, no, you got some freaking

going on right there.

That my wife and my daughter

you're talking about there, nigga.

I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.

- Sorry, dawg, my bad, we didn't know.

- Okay, all right.

- Let's get back to the game.

What's the count?

The count?

Okay, all right, okay, my man, you got five.

Of course, young blood,

he's got two houses.

And, of course, that means you got... zero.

Oh, man.

Know what?

I let you off the hook with my wife.

I'm about to bust your f***ing ass.

- Sit down, dawg, don't get excited.

- Hold up, don't get excited.

Hold him, hold him.

- Come on!

- Mr. Jenkins. Mr. Jenkins!

Boy, you're lucky. You're lucky

they grabbed you, I know that.

Relax. Look, relax, all right,

it's not worth it, all right. Just let it go.

You're goddamn right, it's worth it.

You let them two niggas talk about

my daughter, you ain't say a damn thing.

- Hey, hey, look, let it go.

- You're just like a damn P.

Y'all only brave when you got your badge

and your little gun on you.

- Look...

- We gonna see, we gonna see.

- Hey.

- What's up?

We're looking for somebody to play

all-time quarterback over here.

- No, I'm cool.

- What? You scared?

Am I...

You think I'm scared? Bring it on.

All right, look. We gonna run deep outs

on these fools, all right?

All right, here we go,

you're gonna run like this.

Okay, but you gotta sell that fake,

you gotta sell that.

And you, you gonna run like this, all right.

Remember, like that.

You gotta juke them right there.

And the rest of you two, you block, okay?

Hey, hey, hey, hey. No long faces, all right.

We a team, all right.

Break on three. All right, bring it in,

bring it in, bring it in.

One, two, three, break.

- Come on, come on, come on.

- Come on, punk.

Y'all better bring your A-game today.

'Cause I'm gonna sack your b*tch ass

for sure.

Down, set, hut, hut, hut!

Come on and get it!

Hey!

Got you, nigga,

told you to bring your A-game.

Punk.

Fat bastard.

That's how we're gonna play?

All right, look.

Just block.

Hey, anybody know who to contact in case

there's a emergency for this coward?

'Cause this nigga

is going down for good this time.

Down, set, hut.

One alligator, two alligator,

three alligator, four alligator...

Kicked your b*tch ass now, yeah.

Look at all y'all faces, all y'all faces. Yeah.

Get your butt up.

Come on, guys. It's cool, no.

We just playing. We just playing.

I'm sorry. I said...

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't hurt the boy.

Oh, damn.

- I'm sorry, baby.

- Don't do that.

I ain't seen a motherf***er run like that

since Jesse Owens.

Mike, how did you learn to run like that?

Chasing niggas?

Come on, Jake.

Leave that boy alone, that's not nice.

- I'm just saying, baby.

- Come on, now.

Look, y'all still hungry? I'll tell you what,

I'll fix you some leftovers.

And you stop laughing at him, be nice.

Run, nigga, run.

Run from the man.

It's okay, baby, I still love you.

- Even though you ran.

- I was not running.

I was looking for a more secure place

to settle our differences.

- There were kids out there.

- I know.

- They were little.

- Very small.

This is not

how I intended for this to go, okay?

Your father is never gonna

approve of me marrying you.

- He'll come around.

- Oh, like hell he will.

Baby, I love you no matter what, all right?

My family is my family, but you're my boo,

my husband to be.

Nobody's gonna come in between that.

Love conquers all.

Isn't that what you told me

the night of our engagement?

I love you.

Hold that thought.

Hey, Monster,

what are you doing here?

How you doing, baby? I heard you was

back in town, just come by to see you.

- Okay.

- Who's this nigga?

This is my boyfriend, Mike.

- Nice to meet you, homie.

- Yeah, no, we cool.

Nice to meet you... Monster, it was?

Yeah, Mr. Monster.

Mr... That's cool.

You know what? I've always had a crush

on you, you know that, right, sweetheart?

- Let me just get my arm out.

- Yeah, you told me.

Did you and Ashley go to school together

or something?

You know what? You look better

than you did last time I saw you.

Thank you.

Ashley, can you come

give me a hand real quick?

- Gotta go, thanks.

- Yeah.

- You know, I was...

- Hey, man, shut your punk ass up.

I'll spit all over you, you hear me?

- Where you from?

- San Diego.

- No, I said what set you from?

- Set? I don't follow you.

You know what I mean, nigga.

What set, what hood,

what gang you from?

Gang... Oh, no, no, no, I'm not...

Hold it. Just give me a little room.

I'm not into all that.

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