Woody Woodpecker Page #7

Synopsis: The hyperactive red-headed bird enters a turf war with a big city lawyer wanting to tear down his home in an effort to build a house to flip.
Director(s): Alex Zamm
Production: Universal Pictures Home Entertainment
 
IMDB:
4.2
Rotten Tomatoes:
17%
PG
Year:
2017
91 min
Website
1,733 Views


What the hell?

-Dad!

-You put my son in a cage?

Well, that was disappointing.

The sheriff's on his way.

We'll be well over the Canadian border

by the time he gets here.

Otis, get me my gun.

Dad, I'm so sorry.

I just couldn't let them kill Woody.

Tommy, this is not your fault.

If I'd listened to you in the first place,

we wouldn't be here.

Uh, real heartfelt moment,

but can we please save

the schmaltz for later?

In case you didn't notice,

I'm about to get stuffed!

-This time

no interruptions.

Guess we can kiss the sequel goodbye.

-That cage was built to hold a bear.

You can't escape.

Who said anything about me getting out?

Huh? Hmm.

Get ready for a beatdown!

Oh, crud!

I wonder who's gonna win.

The suspense is killing me!

Take this, and some of these!

Where do you think you're going?

Now that's what I call

taking out the trailer trash.

Nice job, Woody.

Hey, I got your back.

Heads up!

NATE:
Otis! Otis!

Woody, don't let them get away!

-Woody, go get 'em!

-TOMMY:
Stop him!

-I'm on it!

Stop in the name of the law!

Ooh.

-The truck!

-Keys!

-The ATV.

Come on! We'll take the logging trail

across the border. Go!

Ah!

I got this.

Ah, cue the action chase music.

Ha-ha.

I'm coming to get you!

Whoa!

OTIS:
I think we lost him!

Well, come on, let's go!

OTIS:
Kick it! Come on!

WOODY:
Going somewhere?

Oh, hello, eh! Welcome to Canada.

Do you have anything to declare?

Quick. Let's go back!

Get a grip!

He's just one little bird!

There's two of us.

Make your move, bird.

A knife?

I told you!

He's more chicken than woodpecker!

Huh?

And for this week's lesson...

Gravity!

Toodle-oo!

Going somewhere?

Heya, fellas. Remember me?

Save us!

Please! Lock us up!

-Lock us up!

-Save us!

I have been waiting for this day

for a very long time.

That bird is crazy.

Who you calling crazy?

Now it's your turn to live in a cage. Ha!

LANCE:
So, what do you think?

TOMMY:
It's pretty cool, Dad.

SAM:
It's beautiful.

LANCE:
If you think it's beautiful now,

wait till it's actually built.

Good thing my insurance

covered woodpecker damage.

Well, I think you're

gonna be very happy here.

And since it's a smaller footprint,

there'll be plenty of room

for the nine-hole golf course.

I'm surprised you didn't wanna

build a shopping mall.

What an amazing idea.

Oh, Dad, the surprise?

Oh, right. Saved the best for last.

Hey, Woody?

Oh, Woody?

Is it food o'clock?

Woody, I am very sorry

I destroyed your home.

But technically,

you destroyed mine first, so we're even.

But in the interest of harmonious living,

I got something for you.

Huh?

Ready?

Woo-hoo!

I got a home again!

It's got built-in appliances

and granite countertops!

All right!

You guys are my family now.

I never even knew I needed one.

Aw, he's giving you love taps.

Ow. Ow. Too much love, Woody.

Woody, I got it!

TOMMY:
Night, Dad.

Good night, Tommy.

Home sweet home!

Don't you just love happy endings?

Whoops.

Huh?

My bad.

Woody!

Gotta fly!

Boy, someone's in a hurry

for the credits. See you!

Guess who?

TOUR GUIDE:
Niagara Falls is one of

the most scenic spots in all the world.

The grandeur of this famous attraction

brings visitors from far and near.

It is a favorite spot for honeymooners,

who stand and gaze at its wondrous beauty.

Niagara affects

different people in different ways.

Some people are overcome by a strong urge

to go over the falls in a barrel.

Of course this foolhardy stunt

is now absolutely prohibited.

And, I might add, nobody has gone over

since I've been on the job.

Nobody?

Nobody.

And I...

A barrel?

Hey, you, going over the falls

in a barrel is absolutely prohibited.

Hey! Come back with my barrel!

Yikes!

No, no! No!

ALL:
Hooray!

Well, now I need a new barrel.

Good barrel.

Good solid barrel.

Bring back my barrel!

ALL:
Hooray!

Come out of there, you crazy woodpecker!

I'll show you! Take that. Now keep out!

And stay out!

Oh, no!

ALL:
Hooray!

Oh, shut up!

A barrel!

I know a barrel when I see one.

ALL:
Hooray!

ALL:
Hooray!

That woodpecker!

Before we go over now, men,

is there anyone here without a barrel?

ALL:
Hooray!

Which way to Niagara Falls?

Mush.

Mush.

Mush.

Mush.

Hush.

Mush.

TOUR GUIDE:
Now we'll see

who's going over the falls in a barrel.

ALL:
Hooray!

So, going over the falls in a barrel, eh?

I'm giving you a ticket.

Rate this script:4.0 / 1 vote

Alex Zamm

Alex Zamm is an American film director. Beginning with 1998's Chairman of the Board, he has directed numerous poorly received films, most of them released directly to DVD. With a focus on creating family entertainment, Zamm has directed such films as My Date with the President's Daughter, Tooth Fairy 2, The Pooch And The Pauper, Dr. Dolittle: Million Dollar Mutts, R.L. Stine’s: The Haunting Hour, and Snow. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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