You, Me and Dupree Page #4

It's more the other way

around. I work to live.

Incidentally, what's

your policy on Columbus Day?

Yeah, we work.

Really?

The guy discovered

the New World.

I'm afraid to even ask

about Victory over Japan Day.

You have a call waiting

on line:
::

Hey, we tried. Right?

Thanks a lot. Yeah.

I'm gonna keep my rsum.

Excuse me.

You've got to lean into it

and commit to it.

That's the way.

You get hurt if you're afraid.

And if you time it

just right, then you both...

There he goes. Come down.

You guys got to

get a rhythm going.

Come on.

Here, watch me. See, I'm just

running down the ramp.

It's actually harder

than on a skateboard.

There we go.

Speed's your friend. Hold on.

Yeah, come down. Go.

You see how he's timing it?

And then he pops it up? Go!

Yes! Go! One more time.

So,

what's going on over here?

Carl, check out this badass

skate ramp I had Aaron's dad

build for us.

Hey, man, I was just

telling these guys how we used

to tear it up back in the day.

Yep! Pretty good.

Hey, I got an idea.

What do you say we put on

a little show for these guys?

Throw down some one-wheelers.

Make it rain out here.

Come on. For a second.

BOY 1:
Yeah,

let's see what you got.

BOY 2:
Yeah,

show us something.

Okay, give me a board.

Yes! Carl!

Step aside, guys.

Honey, I need some help.

CARL:
Yep,

just like back in the day.

DUPREE:
Nice!

CARL:
Let's show them

how we used to do it.

DUPREE:
Step aside.

Step aside.

(BOTH EXHALING)

Well, no one ever said

we were gonna live forever.

Let's go.

Carl! Carl,

what are you doing?

What's it look like

he's doing? He's getting

ready to rip it up.

Relax, Molly.

This is only gonna

take a second.

BOY:
Come on, Dupree!

Say when.

When!

Yeah!

(CARL GROANING)

(SHOUTING)

DUPREE:
Oh, I'm racked!

Carl!

Oh, I racked

my little Duprees.

When was the last time

you were even on a skateboard?

Oh.

For a second there

we almost had it back.

CARL:
Yeah.

CARL:
What is this?

Are you kidding me?

Are you kidding me?

Is this some kind of a joke?

Carl,

Thompson wanted more units.

Thought it would work better

as a wraparound.

Wraparound.

Mesa Vista

is not a wraparound.

Hasta maana, Paco.

Good night, boss.

Look, Mr. Thompson.

Hey. You see

the preliminaries?

Yeah, I did, and

it's completely different

than my original proposal.

God damn it, Carl.

Will you stop fighting this?

People buy homes.

Let the government

pay for the parks.

That's why we have taxes.

The Oaks at Mesa Vista

is a money train.

You wanna be on it?

Yeah, I'm on it.

Money train.

I'll give you a money train.

(TV PLAYING)

DUPREE:

Right there! Right there!

You gotta throw it now!

NEIL:
Please, please, please!

No, he didn't go over!

No! No! Why?

He didn't make it, man.

Carl! Welcome home!

Come here, buddy!

We got one for you.

DUPREE:
Get a beer for him.

What are you guys doing?

We're watching the game.

Yeah, I can see that.

Hey, guys!

Please, shut the hell up

for two seconds

'cause it's

fourth and inches.

Please, just shut up.

You shut up!

NEIL:
It's fourth and inches!

Why don't you watch it

in your house?

I can't have friends

over on weeknights

and you know that.

Grow a sac.

It's not my problem, Neil.

Take it up with Annie.

Time for the lion tamer.

Yeah, well, I can't

talk to him like this.

What's going on?

You all right?

Yeah. I'm fine.

God, I've been

watching you lately, man,

and you're really putting in

the hours, but you got

to find some balance.

Find a little Carl time.

You know what I'm saying?

Carl time.

First down, Cougars:

Now Washington State:::

You're right.

Carl time.

Come here.

Molly's got the

Back to School

thing tonight.

We got the house

to ourselves for a while.

Let's watch the game.

Let your hair down.

Let your hair down.

I mean...

You think I've been

overdoing it

with the work thing?

I know you've been

overdoing it.

Yeah. Shake it loose, huh?

Just live a little, man.

Just live a little.

Yeah. You know,

maybe I ought to

make my nachos.

Nice!

Yes!

Carl time!

NEIL:
Nachos, Carl nachos

are in my belly.

CARL:
Hey, Neil,

turn up the volume.

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

You know who else loves

Carl's nachos is Eddie.

Give him a call.

I already did.

Carl, soup them up, man!

Make them spicy!

Okay, guys.

This is it. This is it.

Come on. Just come on.

Please. Please, God!

Send everybody!

Send everybody!

Yes! Yes! Yes!

Damn!

DUPREE:
No, no.

NEIL:
No, no.

No!

No, no!

No! No!

No!

Yes!

What did I tell you?

That's what I'm saying!

Congratulations, idiots.

Congratulations, guys.

Very good.

Fifty pushups, f*ggot.

Fifty pushups.

I'm not giving you

any pushups.

That was the deal.

Fine. Okay? Enjoy it.

ALL:
One, two...

He has a condition.

ALL:
...three, four.

That's right!

I have a condition.

I should not keep doing this.

Come on!

NEIL:
I have a gamey colon,

and it gets spastic

and spasms.

CARL:

You don't have a condition.

Carl. Carl! Neil,

shut up! Carl.

I didn't read that.

Mark, what? What is it, Mark?

Molly.

Hi.

Oh, hey, Molly.

(BLENDER WHIRRING)

CARL:
You're home early.

Really?

I just invited

some of the guys over

to watch a little football.

Figured it was just a

little time to loosen up.

A little Carl time.

(WHOOPING)

Me gusta margarita!

Hola, Dupree.

Hola, Molly.

ALL:
Charlie.

Brilliant.

CHARLIE:
Sorry.

We should go.

You guys want to go?

Yeah, let's get out of here.

That's a good idea.

Let's go to Larry's.

Let's get out of here.

Let it go. Let it go.

CHARLIE:
What'd I do

with my tie?

Let's go.

Bye.

Sorry, I ashed on your floor.

Great.

Take that tie off your head.

I'll bring this back tomorrow.

I'll give it to Carl

at the office.

So, don't tell Annie

I was here. And if you do,

don't...

Just don't tell her that

I asked you not to...

Get out, Neil.

Out!

Okay. I'll just go.

I know what you're thinking,

Molly.

But we were gonna have

this rug shampooed.

I promise you.

Oh, and look. Look at that.

It's my grandmother's

silver cheese platter.

You used it to serve nachos.

Well,

nachos have cheese in them.

Let me just start

cleaning up some of...

Dupree, please stop.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Somebody arriving

late for the party.

Don't worry about it.

The party... Game's over!

Go away! The party's over!

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Party... Molly,

for the love of God! Please!

We heard there were

some bad boys in here.

There were, but they left.

(GOT TO BE SOME CHANGES MADE

PLAYING)

You know, Carl, I...

I really think I've been

pretty cool about this

whole situation,

and I hate having

this conversation with you.

But this is not exactly

how I pictured us

getting started.

I know.

Look, Dupree's got to go.

No. It's not about

kicking Dupree out.

It's just that you said

it was gonna be

a couple of days.

Look, Molly.

He's my best friend.

Somehow I feel

responsible for him.

Then maybe it's time

to start prioritizing

your responsibilities.

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