Yours, Mine and Ours Page #2

One at a time.

- She and Louise had a fight.

- A bad fight.

Louise wouldn't come out

of the bathroom for an hour.

She went in, and they were yelling.

- Is that strawberry jam on your hands?

- Raspberry.

I guess she started shaking her...

Or she slipped on the soap.

- Anyway, she fell.

- She didn't fall, she fainted...

...right on the floor.

When Mrs. Ferguson came out, I was

kind of mad, and I had to push her.

Wait a minute. Hold it!

Louise fainted? Where is she?

She's in her room crying,

and she won't come out.

We tried.

I think she's dying.

- And what have you been playing with?

- Ink.

Indelible.

Louise.

Louise, what in the world happened

between you and Mrs. Ferguson?

I don't wanna talk about it.

Leave me alone.

Mary said you fainted.

Is something wrong?

No. I just wish I could get out of this

house and drown myself, that's all.

At least I'd be alone.

Let me take you to the dispensary,

have them check you out.

No. I don't wanna see any doctors,

and I don't want them to see me!

- But, Louise...

- No, please. I don't want to.

No, stop it! I don't want to.

No, put me down!

I don't wanna go, please.

Stop it, I don't want to.

Mr. Beardsley?

- How is she?

- Oh, she's fine.

Nothing to worry about.

May I talk to you?

Privately.

I forgot my Post Toasties.

We've scarcely met, but I feel

that I must talk to you about this.

Of course.

Your daughter tells me

that you're a widower?

Yes, that's right.

I'm awfully sorry.

Louise seems to feel the loss

of her mother very deeply.

On top of that, she's going through

a very trying time emotionally.

I don't quite understand.

Am I being stupid?

No, you're being a man,

which is sometimes the same thing.

You can learn to do

the shopping for the family...

...and maybe even do the dishes...

...but that doesn't exactly

make you a mother.

Well, I'm not really cut out for the job.

Well, it seems that it's not been easy...

...for Louise to explain to you that...

You know...

...a tree can blossom in the middle

of a busy city...

...but a young girl needs privacy...

...and she hasn't been able

to find it at home.

So if she's been emotional or upset

or even a little bit hysterical...

...it's because she's growing up

and suddenly changing.

Is that all? Why didn't she tell me?

Because you would've said,

" Is that all?"

She said that she's been very upset...

...about having to share

her room at home, and...

Today, when the maid walked in

while she was taking a bath...

...she was so embarrassed that she...

- Poor Louise.

Stopped being a little girl,

and I never noticed.

Well, if it's any help, I understand.

I'm a widow, and I have

the same problem in reverse.

Now I'm sorry.

Have you been alone very long?

Forever.

Almost a year now.

I know what you mean.

Dick was a navigator.

He crashed, routine training flight.

- Navy?

- What else is there?

Children?

They say it's toughest on the kids...

...but they haven't convinced me.

- I know.

And right now I think you have...

...a rather difficult assignment

with your daughter.

I think you should go in

and talk to her and take her home.

Thank you, Mrs?

North. Helen.

Thank you, North Helen.

- When are you on duty here?

- Afternoons. Five days a week.

Any of my kids get sick on

the weekend, I'll hold them over.

Hi.

- How do you feel?

- I'm fine.

- Can I go home now?

- Sure.

Turn around.

- Hello.

- Oh, is this North Helen?

- Yes. Who is this?

- This is Frank Beardsley.

Oh, are you having more problems?

No, no. I just called to thank you for

helping me with my daughter today.

Well, now, that's the worst reason

I ever heard...

...for calling a woman

at 11:
00 at night.

Well, I'm a little out of practise.

Well, as a matter of fact, so am I.

Oh, for heaven's sake,

ask her out to dinner.

Who's that?

- What are you doing on this phone?

- I have to make an important call...

...and he gets off duty

at the taco stand at 11: 15.

Colleen, hang up.

- I'm sorry.

- Don't be.

I could never have done it

without her.

How about dinner? Tomorrow night.

Well...

Mother, it's 11:
14.

What time would you like

to pick me up?

- About 1900?

- Aye, aye, sir.

- Good night, Helen.

- Good night, Frank.

Good night, Colleen.

Mother, don't blink.

You've got to let the glue dry.

But I look ridiculous

with all this goop on my eyes.

- Mommy, you're beautiful.

- You sure are.

Thank you, but is it necessary

that I wear these eyelashes?

I got your father without them.

- But you were younger then.

- Yeah.

- Here. Here goes the other side.

- Hold steady.

Okay, let me take it now.

- Mother.

- What?

Is he handsome?

I mean, in an old sort of way.

- Gee, I can hardly wait to meet him.

- Me too.

Let's not overwhelm him with family.

Not the first date, huh?

- You mean he doesn't know about us?

- Of course he does, darling.

All of us?

Mother, that's so romantic.

- You lied to him.

- I did not lie to him.

I just didn't have the nerve

to tell him the whole truth.

I understand. No man wants a liaison

with a woman with eight children.

- What's a liaison?

- An affair.

- That's what I thought.

- Me too.

I am not having an affair,

and I'm not having a liaison.

I'm merely going to dinner.

As soon as I tell him about you...

...he'll bring me home

in plenty of time for dessert.

Mike, see that it's lights out

by 10:
00.

- Ten o'clock?

- We're back in kindergarten?

- They stay up later in prison.

- Would you like to move?

When you finish with the slot cars...

...spend 10 minutes

with your geometry book.

Flowers, Pop?

Is that corny. How do you expect

to make any time with that approach?

We are just going to dinner.

It isn't going to be a love- in.

- You can say that again.

- No such luck.

Did you tell the lady

you have 10 little children...

...two of them given away?

- You bet he didn't.

He'll hand her those flowers,

then give her a snow job...

...on how lonely it is here at home.

- You listen to me.

Every time in the last year that I've

dared take a woman to dinner...

...or been reckless enough

to bring her home to meet you...

...you've done all you could to make

her unwelcome. Well, I've had it.

I'm doing all I can for you,

little as that is...

...I think I deserve

some consideration.

I suppose I'm being unfair.

Who did this?

My generation is the givers,

your generation, the takers.

Well, it's time to strike a blow

for freedom.

From now on,

I intend to think of myself first.

If this be treason,

make the most of it.

- But are you gonna tell her?

- Yes, I'm going to tell her.

You're gonna be a knockout

tonight, Mom.

- Yeah, Mom, you're beautiful.

- Thank you, darling.

Good heavens,

what did you do to this dress?

Mother,

it was practically an antique.

We just shortened it a little.

- A little? I look like a teenybopper.

- Well, what's wrong with that?

- I can't go out in this.

- Why not?

Your legs are better than mine.

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