Ziegfeld Follies Page #5

Synopsis: In heaven, showman Florenz Ziegfeld Jr. fondly recalls his first Broadway revue, the Ziegfeld Follies of 1907. Even from heaven, he is hoping that he can, for one last time, create that same magic by mounting one last follies. As he thinks about who he would like to appear in these follies, he is assisted in realizing his fantasy, at least in his own mind, by such luminaries as Fred Astaire, Edward Arnold, 'Lucille Ball', Marion Bell, Lucille Bremer, Fanny Brice, Cyd Charisse, Judy Garland, Kathryn Grayson, Lena Horne, Gene Kelly, James Melton, Victor Moore, Virginia O'Brien, Red Skelton, Esther Williams, Keenan Wynn, and, of course, a bevy of beautiful girls.
 
IMDB:
6.6
Rotten Tomatoes:
75%
APPROVED
Year:
1945
110 min
242 Views


In Limehouse

Where you can hear those blues all day

And they seem all around

Like a long, long sigh

Queer sob sigh

"Oh, honey lamb," they seem to cry

Such a lovely sight

And everything was simply grand

That is until last night

He pinched me

He pinched me

He wouldn't let me be

I think he did it just to make...

Last night down our alley came a toff

Nice old geezer with a nasty cough

Sees my missis, takes the lady off

In a very gentlemanly way

"Ma'am," says he,

"I have some news to tell

Your rich uncle Tom of Camberwell

Has popped off

And really now it ain't a sell

Left to you his little donkey shay"

"Wot cher,"

All the neighbors say

"Who you going to meet, Bill?

Think you own the street, Bill?"

Laugh, I thought I would've died

Knocked him in the Old Kent Road

Oh, Limehouse kid

Oh, oh, oh, Limehouse kid

Going the way

That the rest of them did

Poor broken blossom

And nobody's child

Haunting and taunting

You're just kind of wild, oh

Oh, Limehouse blues

I've the real Limehouse blues

Learned from the willow

Those sad China blues

Rings on your fingers

And tears for a crown

That is the story

Of old Chinatown

Rings on your fingers

And tears for a crown

That is the story

Of old Chinatown

We are here to interview a lady

Known to you because of her ability

As the glamorous amorous lady

They call...

She's expecting you, gentlemen.

Won't you come in?

Now we don't mean Greta

And we don't mean Bette-a

Or Loretta

or The Song of Bernadette- a

We mean the fabulous "dabulous" lady

They call...

The other gentlemen are here.

Please come in.

- She's news

- She's front-page stuff

- She's headlines

- She's tops

And in advance

The critics are all in accord

She's gonna win

The next Academy Award

All her fans will be delighted

Not to mention quite excited

At her personal appearance

Presently

She's "stupendious," "tremendious"

"Collosical," "terrifical"

She's got it

But definitely

The glamorous amorous lady

They call...

Fribbins, what is all this?

The gentlemen of the press, milady.

Darlings.

How utterly charming of you

to have dropped in like this.

How delightfully informal of you

to have dropped in like this.

I mean, how perfectly

marvelous of you to have...

Well, you have dropped in,

haven't you?

And I...

Well, gentlemen...

...you have caught me

pitifully unprepared.

And now you may rise.

And now you may rise.

Come. Get up, get up, get up.

Let's get on with this.

There. Now, that's better, isn't it?

Gentlemen of the press.

Members of the fourth estate,

what can I do for you?

Tell me, pray do.

Oh, glamorous lady

Oh, amorous lady

Oh, "hamorous" lady

Here's to you

And humbly we're here to

Quite mumbly we're here to

"Humdrumly" we're here

To interview you

We're here to pry

Into your private life

We're here to seek

Your every secret

We're here to scoop a scoop

Obviously

What is your next vehicle to be?

This is much too much.

A sort of a bit of a go and touch.

But confidentially, gentlemen,

and this is off the record, of course.

Of course.

But about my next picture...

I'm faced with a curious problem.

Shall I always be dramatic?

Biographically emphatic?

Should I devote my life

To the legitimate art?

Or should I do what I'd adore so?

Do my acting with my torso

And give all the natives a start?

Must the roles I play be tragic?

Full of Oscar-winning magic?

Should I drain the cup of drama

To its dregs?

Or do you think it is permissible

To be, for once, quite kissable

And give them a peep of my legs?

I'd like to be a pinup girl

A cheesecake girl too

And what is Ginger Rogers

That I am not?

And what has Betty Grable got

That I haven't got?

Oh, the cinema must exhibit me

In roles that so inhibit me

I feel, well, I feel just like a soldier

Out of step

Yes.

But would the episode outlive me?

Would my public quite forgive me?

If I tried to show the world

I'm really hep?

Oh, but now, you darlings.

You adorable dear, dear boys.

I'm going to tell you

all about my next picture.

What is my next picture?

No, don't tell me, don't tell me.

Excuse me, darling.

Madame Crematante.

Madame Crematante, gentlemen...

...will be a monumental

biographical tribute...

...to a monumental

biographical woman...

...who toiled, searched, starved...

...slaved, suffered...

...pioneered, so that the world...

...you and I...

...could reap the benefits

of her magnificent discovery:

The safety pin.

The story starts in a dark, dank...

...dingy tenement in Amsterdam.

Holland, you know.

In the flat of a poor

impoverished family...

...but of rather good antecedents.

Gretchen Crematante was a very

brave and noble woman who...

...against the wishes of her father...

The baron, you know.

- Married this young inventor

who didn't have a sou, penniless.

- And there they were in Amsterdam

- In Amsterdam?

Yes, there they were

In a dark and dingy tenement flat

With no food and no heat

And no money for to pay the rent

- But did they care?

- No, they don't care

Madame Crematante

She don't care

'Cause she seen the light

Just the other day

Since then she been trying

For to find a way

For to bring to the world a big invent

- And so she did

- And so she did

Madame Crematante did

She toiled and strived

And sweat and slaved

A- stretchin' her mind

And beginnin' to rave

But the price she paid

Was worth the pain

For on a cold and frosty morn

- Oh, no

- The safety pin was born

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Halle, lu, lu, lu, lu, jah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Halle, lu, lu, lu, lu, jah

Shout hallelujah and a big amen

For the lady with the safety pin

She really rocks about and gives you

What more do you want?

- Madame Crematante

- Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah

Scream and shout

Who cares what it's all about

Just as long as you're stompin'

And jivin' and gassin' and gabbin'

And jammin' and jumpin'

When you talk about the safety pin

Who's got the safety pin?

Slip me the safety pin

- No doubt about it

- No baby can do without

The safety pin

The safety pin

The safety pin

The safety pin

The safety pin

Madame Crematante

She's a lady who was heaven-sent

She's the lady with the big invent

- Safety pin

- Madame Crematante

She's the lady with the big invent

Madame Crematante

She's the lady with the big invent

Madame Crematante

She's the lady with the big invent

Madame Crematante the big invent

How are you?

- Say, you're Fred Astaire. Hello.

- That's right. Hello.

I'm sorry, I can't quite place you.

What line of business are you in?

Well, I dance.

Oh, at home for the folks,

picnics and that kind of thing?

- No, in public.

- On street corners?

Oh, no. On the screen.

Motion pictures.

You do go to pictures

that have dancing in them, don't you?

I try to see them all.

I go as often as I can.

Did you see a picture

called Cover Girl?

Yes.

Well, who did all the dancing

in that?

You're not Rita Hayworth?

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David Freedman

David Freedman (April 26, 1898 – December 8, 1936) (aged 38) was a Romanian-born American playwright and biographer who became known as the "King of the Gag-writers" in the early days of radio. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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