2001 Maniacs Page #5

What do you got in mind?

430

00:
25:38,637 -- 00:25:40,434

lt's called

Kill the Kitty.

431

00:
25:40,472 -- 00:25:43,407

-Sh*t.

-See, kitty's been bad.

432

00:
25:43,441 -- 00:25:44,931

Real bad.

433

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25:44,976 -- 00:25:47,376

l'm gonna lynch her.

434

00:
25:47,412 -- 00:25:49,380

And y'all

can be the witnesses!

435

00:
25:49,414 -- 00:25:50,540

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

All right.

436

00:
25:50,582 -- 00:25:51,913

What would

your mother think...

437

00:
25:51,950 -- 00:25:53,008

if you hurt

that poor little kitty?

438

00:
25:53,051 -- 00:25:55,451

My mama?

439

00:
25:55,487 -- 00:25:57,455

Mister, my mama give me

a silver dollar...

440

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25:57,489 -- 00:26:00,424

for every broke-neck p*ssy

l bring home.

441

00:
26:19,678 -- 00:26:21,669

Harper, honey...

442

00:
26:21,713 -- 00:26:24,204

this isn't exactly

what l had in mind.

443

00:
26:24,249 -- 00:26:29,050

Well, Miss P*ssy,

it's exactly what l had in mind.

444

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26:29,087 -- 00:26:33,217

Now, l know you city folk

think us country boys naive...

445

00:
26:33,258 -- 00:26:34,748

in the ways of love...

446

00:
26:34,793 -- 00:26:38,160

but we ain't as innocent

as you might think.

447

00:
26:38,196 -- 00:26:39,857

l mean...

448

00:
26:41,199 -- 00:26:45,636

l think this might be taking it

just a little too far.

449

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26:45,670 -- 00:26:48,730

Frankly, Miss P*ssy,

l don't give a damn.

450

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27:06,424 -- 00:27:08,688

Yee-haw!

451

00:
27:10,562 -- 00:27:12,029

Ow.

452

00:
27:12,063 -- 00:27:14,054

l know it's not etiquette...

453

00:
27:14,099 -- 00:27:15,828

to eat without

everyone present...

454

00:
27:15,867 -- 00:27:18,028

but a little birdie

advised me...

455

00:
27:18,069 -- 00:27:21,561

that perky friend of yours

is gonna be a little bit tardy.

456

00:
27:21,606 -- 00:27:24,871

So let us pray.

457

00:
27:24,909 -- 00:27:26,035

Dear Lord...

458

00:
27:26,077 -- 00:27:29,911

we thank you for the food

we are about to eat...

459

00:
27:29,948 -- 00:27:34,749

that makes us whole

in mind, body, and soul.

460

00:
27:34,786 -- 00:27:36,048

Amen.

461

00:
27:36,087 -- 00:27:37,452

Dig in.

462

00:
27:37,489 -- 00:27:39,616

l'm so hungry

l could eat an entire goat...

463

00:
27:39,658 -- 00:27:41,888

and not share

a single hoof.

464

00:
27:41,926 -- 00:27:43,052

Disgusting.

465

00:
27:43,094 -- 00:27:44,459

Huckleberry's

got the munchies.

466

00:
27:44,496 -- 00:27:47,021

lt's Hucklebilly,

pig breath.

467

00:
27:47,065 -- 00:27:48,828

Can't you Northern folks

get nothing right?

468

00:
27:51,202 -- 00:27:52,897

Miss Boone--

469

00:
27:52,937 -- 00:27:55,565

Excuse me, Granny.

470

00:
27:55,607 -- 00:27:57,268

You've simply

outdone yourself.

471

00:
27:57,308 -- 00:27:58,297

Thank you.

472

00:
27:58,343 -- 00:27:59,469

Hear, hear.

473

00:
27:59,511 -- 00:28:00,637

Sure looks tasty. Mmm.

474

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28:00,679 -- 00:28:02,237

Speaking of tasty...

475

00:
28:02,280 -- 00:28:05,443

it appears that, uh,

our Harper Alexander...

476

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28:05,483 -- 00:28:09,419

has done gone and swept

your Miss Kitty Cat here...

477

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28:09,454 -- 00:28:10,682

off her feet.

478

00:
28:10,722 -- 00:28:12,280

Lucky b*tch.

479

00:
28:14,392 -- 00:28:15,450

Guest or no guest...

480

00:
28:15,493 -- 00:28:17,961

l will not tolerate

swearing at my table.

481

00:
28:17,996 -- 00:28:19,190

Just ignore him.

482

00:
28:19,230 -- 00:28:22,063

Jealousy always gets

in the way of his manners.

483

00:
28:22,100 -- 00:28:23,226

Jealousy?

484

00:
28:23,268 -- 00:28:26,294

Kat always bags

the fine guys first.

485

00:
28:26,337 -- 00:28:29,465

Just once l wish

she was the one eating...

486

00:
28:29,507 -- 00:28:30,735

sloppy seconds.

487

00:
28:54,466 -- 00:28:58,425

May l offer you some

fresh milk with your pie?

488

00:
28:58,470 -- 00:29:00,529

l--l--l think--

l think you just did.

489

00:
29:01,740 -- 00:29:04,072

l'll keep my jug handy.

490

00:
29:09,047 -- 00:29:11,709

Holy mother of God.

491

00:
29:15,353 -- 00:29:17,048

ls this seat taken, miss?

492

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29:18,256 -- 00:29:20,417

What if l said it was?

493

00:
29:20,458 -- 00:29:22,187

Well, l guess

l'd have to tell you...

494

00:
29:22,227 -- 00:29:23,216

what a mistake

you've made...

495

00:
29:23,261 -- 00:29:26,128

and what an opportunity

you've missed.

496

00:
29:28,566 -- 00:29:29,999

l guess l couldn't

give you these.

497

00:
29:30,034 -- 00:29:32,366

How...romantic.

498

00:
29:33,471 -- 00:29:35,598

You ever hear of

a sixty-second romance?

499

00:
29:37,041 -- 00:29:38,338

Got a minute?

500

00:
29:38,376 -- 00:29:40,173

l got all night.

501

00:
29:53,558 -- 00:29:55,150

You listen up careful now.

502

00:
29:56,795 -- 00:29:59,958

Harper done did his duty

for the festival

503

00:
29:59,998 -- 00:30:01,465

with that Yankee filly.

504

00:
30:01,499 -- 00:30:05,560

Time's now come

for you two to do yours.

505

00:
30:08,106 -- 00:30:10,540

That's a mighty big noose

you got there for a cat.

506

00:
30:10,575 -- 00:30:13,601

Who says

it's for a cat, jug head?

507

00:
30:13,645 -- 00:30:14,907

Why, if you even think

of hurting Jezebel--

508

00:
30:14,946 -- 00:30:16,880

Shut your mouth now,

Lester.

509

00:
30:16,915 -- 00:30:18,314

Leave that boy alone.

510

00:
30:21,419 -- 00:30:25,287

Been meaning to talk

to you about Jezebel.

511

00:
30:25,323 -- 00:30:29,350

ls, uh, this mutton chop

at least a girlie?

512

00:
30:29,394 -- 00:30:31,555

She's a woman

to you, Daddy.

513

00:
30:31,596 -- 00:30:34,394

Now, if y'all excuse us...

514

00:
30:34,432 -- 00:30:35,694

come on, baby.

515

00:
30:35,733 -- 00:30:38,668

Now, Daddy. Daddy,

don't mind Lester none.

516

00:
30:38,703 -- 00:30:40,568

l got full confidence

in him.

517

00:
30:40,605 -- 00:30:45,907

Son, one time l had

full confidence in a fart.

518

00:
30:45,944 -- 00:30:49,038

Sh*t all over myself.

519

00:
30:51,516 -- 00:30:53,245

Hey, perv.

520

00:
30:53,284 -- 00:30:55,149

Hey, chick with milk jugs

walk by?

521

00:
30:55,186 -- 00:30:59,179

She was headed

toward the cow pasture...

522

00:
30:59,224 -- 00:31:01,624

crying your name.

523

00:
31:01,659 -- 00:31:03,490

When you're finished

with your boyfriend...

524

00:
31:03,528 -- 00:31:04,995

you know where to find me.

525

00:
31:08,099 -- 00:31:09,828

What?

526

00:
31:11,135 -- 00:31:13,035

Gentlemen...

527

00:
31:13,071 -- 00:31:15,699

l believe it is time

for another toast.

528

00:
31:15,740 -- 00:31:17,537

Hit me, bartender.

529

00:
31:17,575 -- 00:31:20,840

To the ties

that bind...

530

00:
31:20,879 -- 00:31:22,847

friendship...

531

00:
31:22,881 -- 00:31:24,906

and in this case...

532

00:
31:24,949 -- 00:31:27,884

the fine folks

of Pleasant Valley!

533

00:
31:29,988 -- 00:31:32,183

Three queens.

534

00:
31:32,223 -- 00:31:33,212

What?

535

00:
31:33,258 -- 00:31:34,350

Nothing.

536

00:
31:34,392 -- 00:31:35,552

B*tch.

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