A Boyfriend for My Wife Page #5

OK. Fine...

That is... well... OK...

Let's see...

At times l'd initiate and feel things

thatweren't...

weren't...

That what?

At times l'd initiate

and feel sort of...

-You'd initiate...?

-Yes, l'd initiate...

You should have made a noise...

because l never actually realised.

l never realised...

And the times l got on top of you?

Ah, but...

What?

When l got on top of you,

what was that?

-You can't hear yourself?

-l don't know, l mean...

-You can't hear yourself?

-l don't know, l mean...

lt's true, l'd often get on top...

l mean it... No...

l want to be careful here...

l don'twant to hurt anyone...

Quite honestly, l don't remember

the last time l came.

This is a joke, Blanca.

-Morning.

-Hello!

-OK?

-Yes.

No!

No!

Well, l'm off.

-l'm a bit nervous.

-OK.

Bye... see you.

-Wish me luck.

-Good luck.

Thanks.

-Tana, how are things?

-Bad.

Why should l lie?

Why should l lie?

-So what's the matter?

-Well, basically...

l realise that living in society

is a big problem for me.

Why? What's wrong?

l feel l'm surrounded by mediocrity,

and frauds...

Optimists,

and this week l realised...

l detest optimism with all my heart.

lt's so damned stupid...

to face life with optimism...

And l realised l'm surrounded by

optimists,

and that fake smile really

gets up my nose, l can't help it.

For some people optimism

is a form of coping...

The other day l ran into a friend,

The other day l ran into a friend,

who's no longer a friend,

and he said he'd smashed the car up.

He was in plaster from hip to ankle,

so l said:
''l can't believe

what you've just done'',

what ''an accident

with a stroke of luck'' is.

what ''an accident

with a stroke of luck'' is.

l fail to see what element of ''luck''...

-Maybeyourfriend needed to see...

-She's got style, eh?

-Maybeyourfriend needed to see...

-She's got style, eh?

Sure, but what l sayis,

why see things so positively?

lfthis poorsod smashed the car up,

he should at least be able to say:

Bloodyhell...

what f***in'bad luck l'm having...

l don't mind whingers at all,

quite the opposite,

l love people who moan, l do.

''Down with optimism, long live

whinging'' l say.

-l reckon you're convincing me.

-Really?

lf l say your coming on this

programme was a stroke of luck,

would you take it

as an optimistic comment?

No... not at all. l'd say...

it's the most sensible thing

you've said so far.

-Thanks, Tana.

-No, thank you.

-Thanks, Mery.

-See you.

Bye friends. Life is the pits.

See you.

l adore your pessimism.

What are you doing here?

What is this?

lt's no coincidence.

l wantto take you to lunch.

-What for?

-To talk something over.

-What?

-No subject...

Careful, l'm married.

l want to have a meal with a woman...

who hates this sort of society.

ls that so wrong?

No.

-Ah, well...

-What's up?

That's it!

You've stolen my heart.

Have pity on me, please.

l'm a mere mortal.

A mixed salad, please.

-Yes...

-The best beef you have...

-Tenderloin.

-Yes, that would be great.

So, let's drink.

-Thanks.

-Would the lady like...

a little ''nervous water''?

-Thank you very much.

-Not at all.

To this meeting.

-Cheers.

-Cheers.

And to my new life.

Naturally.

Some good things have been happening

to me lately, see?

That's not usually how it is.

lf everything's going bad you have

to celebrate the good things.

Don't worry, l'm not going to start

talking. When l start l don't stop.

-Talk, l don't mind.

-No, just for a while.

-l love listening to you.

-No, fine...

l've got all day and all night to

listen to you.

Lots of things...

have changed for me too recently.

l'm telling you this because l like you.

And when l tell you who l am...

You do look familiar.

Absolutely...

You lookfamilar.

Where do l know you from?

-Well...

-Who are you?

l've been ''in hiding'' for a while.

-l'm ''El Cuervo'' Flores.

-Ah...

Don't be scared, please.

l know l've done harm...

And l'm suffering for it.

l'm telling you this because...

l'd like us to be friends.

Nobody knows that.

Nobody knows that.

l've suffered as much

as those l've harmed.

l'll apologise to them all one day.

l swear.

-Can we be friends?

-Of course.

Where have you been all this time?

-Will you excuse me?

-Of course.

Engaged.

Hi, Cuervo! How are things? Fine?

-What are you doing here?

-l wanted to know how it was going.

ls everything going according to plan?

l'm backing out.

lf you just want to watch, l'm off.

No, l don't enjoy watching.

lt'sjust that l came...

l began to feel a sort of anguish

in the chest...

Suddenly...

-Sorry, l feel embarrassed.

-Take it easy.

-No, don't look at me.

-Calm down.

Breathe... inhale...

inhale, easy...

Well...

ln and out.

-Does it hurt?

-A little.

When l say ''go'' you go. OK?

Go.

-Better?

-l'm fine.

Seeing me at work mixed you up, right?

-Yep...

-For a few days...

you'll think you like her again,

but don't worry.

l want total abstinence from you

for a few days, right?

Friendly but distant. lf she speaks,

answer in monosyllables, OK?

Workto rule, got it?

-Got it?

-Yeah...

And don't ask her where she's going

or when she'll be back.

OK?

OK?

Well, that's hard to understand too.

-Hello.

-Hello.

l'll ring you back.

Hello. Won't you say hello?

-Yes, hello.

-How are you?

-Ugh, that stinks.

-Yes, it's wax.

-lt turns my stomach.

-Did you listen to the programme?

-Yes, l did.

-And?

-So so.

-What do you mean so so?

l liked it but... a fewthings...

You can't hear itvery well.

That's because the aerial is not very

powerful... or something.

But they're a great lot who work there.

You used to have a lisp, didn't you?

-A lisp?

-Yeah, the letter 's'.

Well... because l know you...

it sounded weird.

But my friends rang

me because they all loved it.

-Really?

-Yes.

The agent too?

Don't call him ''agent''.

His name's Carlos.

lt's really pejorative calling him

''the agent''.

OK, fine.

l use it affectionately.

l've told you a thousand times.

But you never listen to me.

Sorry.

-lt was a joke, sorry.

-No, it's OK.

l'm so happy your friends liked it.

Are you serious?

-Yes.

-l'm really happy.

-What are you doing?

-Nothing.

Look, l wanted to read to you.

Tomorrow l've got to take along...

another column like today's.

-Can l read it to you?

-No.

-No?

-No.

-Are you busy?

-No, l've got to arrange something.

Can l borrow your cell phone?

l have to make a call...

-The guy from the radio's calling...

-l don't have much credit, mind.

l'll recharge it. l should say

l don'twant to go.

He wants to meet but quite honestly

l'd prefer...

No, no. Let's start again.

You have to go.

No, no. Let's start again.

You have to go.

-Why?

-Because it's yourjob.

-And you have responsibilities.

-Yes.

The radio doesn't stop

when the programme ends.

-lt continues. lsn't there a debate?

-No, luckily...

-Don't you all discuss things?

-l wantto stay and chat with you.

-Go.

-No.

No, really, you have to go.

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