Addicted to Sexting Page #4

from there.

I have no idea how to maintain a

relationship without texting, you know.

Especially sexting.

It's got pacing to it.

You have to keep up the pace.

You have to be creative. You can't use

the same words over and over again.

You know, you can't stop

in the middle.

Ladies.

I might do a boobie,

or maybe, you know, a butt shot or

something like that real quick.

And if he's asking for more,

then I'll go through some other

avenues and do some other things.

Yeah. Different angles.

I have like... I have like a...

It's not really even a sexting thing.

It's just like

a language right now.

It's like,

"You gonna be up for a while?"

"Yeah, you wanna come through?"

And that's, uh...

Now we know what's happening.

And it's just, you know,

very understood.

It's very grown, so to speak.

But I reserve my sexting

for the people that I'm boning.

I like butt.

I like men's butt.

So, they'll send me like...

Nice little picture

of the frame.

Yeah, I like that.

I mean, to me,

that's really like, "Oh, sexy."

It gives me a turn on.

I like that.

Is there something

about sexting that annoys me?

Yes. It doesn't happen enough

in my life.

Uh, other than that girl who

sends me pictures of her b*obs.

Those are really good

b*obs, though.

She likes to send me pictures

of herself naked with the cat.

Like, she's got this

really hot picture she sent me

where she's like arched up,

and her cat's just lying

in the middle of her.

She's like, "Where are you?

My kitty misses you."

Normally, you know,

she'll send a picture of her tits.

I'll send back, you know,

one of my p*ssy.

It's really hot. I keep 'em.

I masturbate to 'em.

Very few people

know how to sext.

That's just the fact of it.

People who don't know how to talk

dirty also don't know how to sext.

I wanna turn this TV off

and turn on your vagina-vision.

I used to try to get guys

I used to date to talk dirty,

and, um, you'd be surprised

at how...

If that's not something

that comes to you naturally,

it's a flop every time.

Don't get me wrong.

Some people have the talent to do it right,

and some people don't.

There are some moments when I'm

reading through a text and I'm like,

"Okay. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Oh, yeah."

And then it's like, wait, what?

Okay, that really threw me for a loop.

Like, that really turned me off.

And then you have other people that like...

It's like reading "50 Shades of Grey."

It's just like a crazy, f***, sex, romance

novel. And you're like, "Oh, my god."

There are some buzz words,

and not in a good way, that I can't handle.

Like, "suckle."

You wanna suckle my breast?

Uh-huh. You're not my child.

That's not gonna...

I can't...

"I wanna watch you pleasure yourself

while I suckle on your breasts."

That's the worst sext

ever in existence.

There's a time and a place

to understand

somebody could be doing something.

I'll give you an example.

Couple of weeks ago,

I was flying home from a gig.

I'm in first class,

sitting next to an older dude

I've never met before.

And of course,

as soon as we land I'm turning on my phone,

and he's looking at my phone.

Which I think is rude, but whatever.

I don't say anything to people.

I never look at

anybody else's phone.

And, of course, it was

one of those moments

where one of my dudes thought it'd be a great

idea to send me a picture of his big black cock.

So I opened the picture.

And I leave it open 'cause I know

this old guy is looking at my phone.

He's now horrified.

He'll be like, "Oh, my god."

That was not

the time or the place

because that guy knew

I was traveling that day,

and I really didn't need to see

a cock shot.

Just had four-hour layover.

Our other flight was delayed.

It was brutal.

So you have to know

time and place.

It has to be

in something engaging

where how you got to this point

where you feel it's necessary

right now to send that cock shot.

There's absolutely nowhere

I wouldn't sext.

I'm gonna be honest.

Um, because the more inappropriate

the location, the better. You know?

Like, if I'm on a thing with someone,

like, if we're having a sex thing,

like put me in church.

Um, oh, okay.

Giving birth.

If I'm giving birth and the head of

my child is crowning out of my p*ssy,

I probably wouldn't sext then.

I will say that the most mundane moments

in life are the best time to sext.

You can make

any monotonous job fun

just by sneaking a couple of

sex texts from your phone.

My favorite time and place

to sext

is probably while at home

by myself.

My favorite time to sext,

typically,

is late afternoon into evening.

When I'm drunk.

Um, yeah.

Here's what I say.

You never go

to the grocery store hungry,

never text horny.

I sext any time of the day.

In the morning,

in the afternoon.

While I'm in the shower.

It's cool too,

'cause my phone case is waterproof.

So I can, like, just take

my phone in the shower

and send snaps in the shower

to whoever. It's funny.

I get a lot back.

Like, immediately right back,

I'll get snaps. Like, whatever.

I don't, like, designate

a time or a dojo to sext in.

I just kinda sext

whenever I want to.

We're really...

It's kinda on his lead.

He'll hit me up, or, you know,

talk to him on the phone.

He'll be like, "Baby,

send me a little something later on

"while I'm at work, so I can look at

it when I'm on my break, or whatever."

So, he'll usually start it out

and it'll get me through the day.

And then I'll start sending

just random stuff just for fun,

to see what his reaction

is gonna be.

And do it randomly, pretty much.

Um...

Maybe like...

I have no limits.

I don't care where I'm at, really.

I don't know.

I probably would in a lot of places.

I mean, the only place, probably church

'cause I try not to look at my phone.

I mean, I suppose if you go to church,

you shouldn't sext in church.

But I'm not really a regular attender,

so that doesn't work for me.

But if I'm there at home, oh,

yeah, it's going down. Mm-hmm.

I think you shouldn't...

Maybe when someone's on stage,

and you're supposed to be supporting

someone, or something like that. Maybe.

I don't wanna talk no more

once you say that right.

And I get that little feeling

in my body and it goes up...

Yeah, she tingling.

Oh, it's time to go down.

But other than that, I feel like,

yeah, you can probably get it in.

Depends on how fast you are.

I have gotten surprise

dick pics. Yeah, I have.

It's shocking in the worst ways.

I wanna see your dick for sure,

but sometimes, the poses, one,

or the places, two,

are the most horrendous things.

Or sometimes the way that your

dick just looks in the picture.

I think it would be funny

to send my flaccid wiener.

Would I do that? Just to everyone?

I would do that to everyone.

Dick pics are like

the modern day flashing.

So, usually flashers

are like turned on

because they know

that they've got something,

you know, between their legs

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