Alice in Wonderland Page #3

or even for a whole week,

then I can come back by popular demand.

But how am I supposed to get inside?

I need to ask them a question.

Will you ever get in, is the

question you should be asking?

I'm going to sit here for days

thinking about it and singing

"Coming Through the Rye".

Dee da dada dar dee dar

da dar dee dar dee dar dum

It's no use talking to you!

I'll just have to do it myself.

That's the spirit!

Pepper!

I want pepper!

Pepper! More pepper...

More pepper!

More pepper!

Please could you tell me why your

cat is grinning at me like that?

He's a Cheshire-Cat.

Cheshire-Cat's always grin.

Isn't that so, Piggy?

I didn't know Cheshire-Cats always grinned.

In fact I didn't know cats could grin.

Uh ho, well you don't know

very much then do you.

Isn't that so Piggy!

Are you really a Duchess?

Every inch!

Pepper! Pepper! Pepper!

Be careful! You almost

hit his poor little nose!

Nonsense!

He can already play "Three

Blind Mice" on his nose-flute!

What do you want little Miss?!

I want to know how to get into the garden?

Oh - now you're talking,

but I prefer singing to talking, don't you?

Let's have a song.

"Speak roughly to the little boy,

And beat him when he sneezes.

He only does it to annoy.

Because he knows it teases."

"I speak severely to my boy,

I beat him when he sneezes.

For he can thoroughly enjoy

the pepper when he pleases"

Here you nurse for a bit...

I've got an appointment... can't wait.

Pepper! More pepper!

I best get you out of here.

They're sure to kill you!

More pepper! Pepper!

I thought you wanted to go in?

I've been in... now I'm coming out.

Life is so complicated!

You mustn't grunt like that. You

sounds as if you've turned into a pig.

You have turned into a pig!

I'd best let you go.

Go on.

When he gets older he'll

make a very ugly child...

or a very handsome pig...

Now which way?

Ah!

Cheshire-Puss, can you

tell me which way to go?

Well that depends on

where you want to get to.

The garden!

Why do you want to go there?

It looks safe.

Sometimes things that

look safe turn out nasty...

and things that look nasty turn out safe.

That's immoral.

What sort of people live around here?

Well a Hatter lives over there.

Follow my pointed paw.

And a gentleman called Hare

nicknamed March lives there.

They're probably having a tea party.

They're both mad.

They're both mad.

But I don't want to meet mad people.

But I don't want to meet mad people.

Oh, but you can't help it,

everyone here is mad.

I'm mad, you're mad.

It's only by chance and

careful planning if you're not.

How do you know I'm mad?

Because you're here!

And everyone here is mad.

I went to a Hunt Ball once, I didn't like it...

Terrible people. They all started hunting me!

Hm... Life must be hard for you?

But I grin a bear it...

By-the-by, what became of the baby?

It turned into a pig.

I knew it would, it's the same

with crows and moor-hens.

Did you say "pig" or "fig"?

I said "pig".

And I wish you wouldn't keep appearing

and disappearing so suddenly.

You're making me very dizzy!

So sorry... is this better?

Which way shall you go?

Which path shall you take?

If you don't take any you will make a mistake.

Which way shall you go?

Which path shall you take?

You have to move on though

you tremble and quake...

Hmm the Cheshire Cat was

right. They are having tea.

I wonder if they'd mind if I joined them?

Have you any more food down there, Dormy?

Any spoilt sandwiches or strawberries?

I love strawberries, don't you? Aha ha ha ha.

I'm sure he's hoarding them!

Oh haw haw haw...

I'm lost... could I... get

No room.

There's no room.

There's plenty of room.

Why didn't you report this sooner, Hatty?

I overslept.

Why're you here?

Well, I've been looking for

the pretty garden all day...

and now I'm tired, and hungry.

Oh, that's different.

We've been eating for hours.

And we've not finished yet.

Waiter, waiter, there's a hair in my soup!

Is it blonde? We're missing a waitress.

Have some wine!

I don't see any wine.

There isn't any and you're too young.

Then it wasn't very nice of you to offer it.

It wasn't very nice of you to

sit down without an invitation.

This is a private soiree.

Well I suppose I should've just barged in.

I know I wasn't invited but the table

was laid out for a lot of people.

My response to that is both

profound a meaningful.

Get your hair cut!

You shouldn't make personal

remarks, it's very rude.

I didn't know that. Personal

remarks are rude?

Hm hmm.

E'gad, you learn something new everyday.

Make a note of that, Marchy,

it might come in useful.

Now I have one for you...

Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Why is a raven...?

I'm not talking to you...

Why not, aren't I good enough?

You've heard it before.

But you were looking at me when

you said "Why is a raven...?"

I'm asking Alice!

Um, why is raven like a writing desk.

You know - I'm pretty sure I can guess.

You mean you think you know the answer?

Yes.

Then you should say what you mean.

Well I do... at... at least...

At least I mean what I say...

That... that is the same thing.

It's not the same thing at all.

You might as well say "I see what I eat"

is the same thing as "I eat what I see"

You might as well say "I like

what I get" as "I get what I like."

Ahhh! Oh!

You or you might as well say

"I breathe when I asleep" is the same

thing as "I sleep when I breathe."

Well it is the same with you!

No no, oh I need some sleep.

Clean cups!

Time marches on it's stomach! Ah ha ha ha.

It's an army that marches on its stomach.

Odd sort of army, marching on it's stomach.

I don't like the idea. Yuck!

What day of month is it?

The fourth.

Ah-ah! Two days wrong!

I told you not to use butter.

- It was the best butter.

- Danish.

Some crumbs must've got into it as well...

I said, "don't put butter in the

works with a bread knife".

I couldn't put it in with a fork could I?

Here, let me see.

I don't want to give it to you - but I will.

Ohh!

Ahhgh!

I don't understand it... it was the best butter.

Danish.

That's a funny watch.

It tells the day of the month but not the time.

Why should it... does your

watch tell you what year it is?

No. Because it stays a year for so long.

Oh well then I rest my case.

Where?

There!

I know when I'm beaten.

Oh look. Mr Dormouse is asleep again.

It tells you a lot about your conversation...

Sparkle, Miss, sparkle!

Of course, of course,

I was just going to say that myself... I'm...

I'm asleep... again...

Have you guessed the

riddle about the raven yet?

Um hmm no, I give up... what's the answer?

I haven't the slightest idea.

Nor me.

I think you should all do

something better with the time

than wasting it on asking stupid riddles.

If you knew Time the way I do, you

wouldn't talk about wasting "it".

Time is a "him".

"It" isn't polite.

I don't know what you mean.

Of course you don't!

Because you've never

spoken to Time have you?

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