All About the Money Page #3

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I'll have to call security and have

them thrown out on their asses.

Uh-oh, Chris, you might want to

check the bottom of your shoes.

I think one of us stepped

in a pile of b*tch.

Funny, Vincent. I'm not loaning you any

money, so you might as well take a hike.

As if I would ever borrow

any money from you, Beth.

What the hell does that mean? We've

supported your ass for years.

Not to mention, you borrow money

from everyone you know, you scumbag.

Don't even look at me, man,

I don't even like this b*tch.

But she got a point.

You owe me $700.

What the hell is with

the baby balloons?

They was on sale, he's a boy.

- And it's the thought that counts, all right?

- You're an idiot.

Chocolate?

That's the last thing he needs,

more screw-ups in his life.

He screwed up

for the last time with me.

He's lucky that I'm

even here right now.

He's in the room!

He can't hear sh*t, he looks

like a freakin' vegetable,

drool and sh*t coming out of his

mouth... this is f***ing disgusting!

And after what he pulled

with daddy today,

I would say divorce is

in his slobbering-ass future.

You know what, Brenda,

that is some coldblooded sh*t

to say about your husband.

My name is Bethany! Bethany!

Tell your loser-ass friend

to get a good divorce attorney.

The less I see

of any of you, the better.

You know you want it.

- Did she just leave him?

- Yeah.

My man is cracked out.

He ain't cracked out, it's all the

Valium they're pumping in his arm.

Look, I don't know what

we're supposed to do,

'cause obviously the crazy b*tch

is not coming back.

- All right, just let me think.

- Put your mind in gear, man.

Look at you, Kurt.

This is the moment where Vincent

saw his opportunity

to be rich and famous.

- That's it.

- Pissin' out his mouth, man.

Whatever, man, f*** him. We gotta go

on vacation, man. We need a vacation.

- What?

- A vacation from our lives.

So this I where I drink

the Kool-Aid, right,

go to this little island

and then die?

No, I'm not talking

about suicide, man,

I'm talking about getting

the hell out of the country.

You broke and I got a j-o-b.

And your job sucks.

You're in a f***in' onesie.

That's where my dick go.

Look, man, I'm broke

but he's not,

and they're still married.

Credit cards,

you know what I'm saying?

Bump the b*tch credit card. Come on, let's

get this crazy motherf***er out of here.

Ooh!

Mr. Chodewell!

Grow up!

Can some...

Hmm-mm-mm.

Yeah, I think we need to stop

feeding him Valiums, man.

I know, look at him, man.

He looks like a disaster.

Can you imagine him at our Hollywood

parties? He's got no tolerance.

How can I help

you gentlemen today?

The three of us adults would

like three tickets to Colombia,

and you can put it

on that man's card.

South Carolina, that's what I'm talkin'

about, man. I got cousins down there.

That's good, man, but we're not

going to South Carolina.

Sir, I think he means

the country of Colombia.

Colombia!

Vincent, are you crazy, man?

That is the drug capital

of the world.

I'm black, they're gonna think

I'm trafficking... click-click.

Chill, dude,

you'll be fine, man.

Everybody knows the Valley's

the drug capital of the world.

Can I carry this on?

Yes.

Betcha they ain't even got

black people in Colombia.

I'm pretty sure the entire country

was founded by black people.

Right, you geniuses are all set.

Have a wonderful time in the

African nation of Colombia!

How is he?

Passed out.

They found an empty row,

just laid him on down there.

Where did you get

them clothes, man?

Don't be laughing at my clothes, man.

Stewardess gave me this.

That boy slobbered

all over my new shirt.

Kurt can never catch

a break, man. Ever.

What?

Do you want to look

in the motherfucking mirror?

All right, I admit I'm going

through a transition right now.

- Oh, that's funny, isn't it?

- You goin' through a Tran...

Vincent, we on a plane.

Where we goin', and why?

Man... you need to learn

to relax.

We are in first class, man. This

is first class. Look at this!

What the f*** up, Vincent?

Promise you're not

gonna get mad.

First class!

What the f***'s up?

All right.

You know, on the news,

every day, that guy,

Juan Garcia, in Colombia.

You know who I'm talking about?

The drug lord Garcia,

chop your head off, yeah, him.

Well, he doesn't necessarily

chop your head off.

I mean, we don't know that. That's

what the news is telling us.

All right? Listen to what

I'm going to say.

- I'm listening.

- There is a 20...

There is a $25 million reward

for the capture of this dude.

And what the f***

does that have to do with us?

$25 million.

Are you out of your

motherfucking mind, Vincent?

He kill people, man.

Your dog will be dead!

The motherf***er

kidnap families,

take 'em over to Colombia

and they never come back, man.

I'm not talking about that. I'm

just saying, let's do recognizance.

That ain't even a word,

"recognizance."

We just go look and see what's

happening from a distance.

- From a distance?

- From a distance.

- Like a vacation.

- Yeah. It is a vac...

- In first class!

- All right.

I like living, know what I'm saying?

Ain't nothing like breathing.

I never heard a dead

motherf***er come back...

- Well, then breathe... -and say

how good it is to be dead.

Some of this.

Is that them shrooms,

motherf***er?

- It is.

- Chocolate marsh.

Yeah, you don't have to yell

to everybody.

Yes, it is, my nigga, it is.

This motherfuckin' trip just got a whole

lot better, know what I'm sayin'?

- Have the pudding.

- Hmm?

It tastes a little different.

He didn't get much time

to put it together, he said.

So...

he had to substitute

a couple of the ingredients.

What did he substitute?

Small sh*t, like butter.

Butter? What did he replace

the butter with?

What did he say, hold on?

Pee-otee? Pee-ot...

Pay-ot... Pee-Ari.

Peyote?!

That motherf***er f***ed

a fire hydrant

butt a**hole naked on that sh*t.

On a Sunday,

in front of the church.

He said it was cool, man.

If you can't trust

your drug dealer,

who are you gonna trust, man?

He does this for a living.

Did you hear what the f***

you just said?

Chemistry lesson 101.

Taking a hodgepodge of drugs

at 35,000 feet

may cause you

to simply feel faded.

I'm trippin'

I'm trippin', I'm trippin'

I'm trippin', I'm trippin'

day to day now

I'm trippin'

I'm trippin', I'm trippin'

I'm trippin', I'm trippin'

my life away

And I'm trippin'

Trippin' inside and slippin'

along with my mind...

Come on, Nancy boy!

I'm turning white.

Heh heh.

- Crazy.

- Hello, Mr. Johnson.

Please enjoy this bottle

of champagne on us.

You mean you're gonna give me

a whole bottle of champagne

for free?

Of course,

Mr. Johnson.

You're white,

you know the rules.

Hi, Mr. Johnson. The pilots would

like a word with you in the cockpit.

- Am I in trouble?

- No, silly.

You're white, come on!

Here, take my pen.

Welcome to first class.

You know what, take my baby.

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