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Big Fat Liar Page #3
Mr. Wolf|doesn't have children.
- Not that he knows of.|- Shh.
Look, this is gonna be|an emotional reunion for all of us,
so once you let us in, you're probably gonna|wanna hold Papa's calls as well.
Mr. Wolf doesn't see anyone|without an appointment.
Marty Wolf Pictures.
No, she stepped away.
I'd love to take a message.|You've got it.
If you'd slow down--
Help me out.|Help me out.|No. No.
Help me out. Help me out.|Help me out. No. No. No. Okay.
Oh.
Marty Wolf Pictures.|One moment, please.
Operator.|Hi. Marty Wolf Pictures, please.
[ Panting, Barks ]|[Phone Rings ]
Marty Wolf Pictures.|Astrid Barker, please?.
Speaking.|This is Doris Del Rio down in parking.
- Do you drive a Saturn?|- Yes.
- Well, it's um--|- It's parked on a dog.
- I'm not gonna say that.|- Come on!
- Hello?.|- Your car's parked on a dog.
Your car is parked on a dog.
My car is parked on a dog?.
Yes, ma'am. In the tail area|to be more specific.
[ Gagging ]|It's gruesome, actually.
- Listen for yourself.|- [Jason Barking ]
[ Barking, Whining ]
Hang on, okay?.|I'm coming! Don't die!
Just stay! Keep breathing!|Think ofa happy place.
All right,|keep a lookout.
I'm sure this thing will be over|in just a few minutes.
[Phone Ringing]
[Ringing Continues ]
Marty Wolf Pictures.|Can I take a message?.
Mr. Wolf is about|to go into a meeting.
Uh-huh. San-- Sandler.|Mm-hmm.
[Wolf] We're not just looking|for my personal organizer, Monty.
That thing is my life!|Ifyou've lost it, then you've killed me.
Simple as that.|Draw a I i ne of chal k around me,|because I am dead!
[ Monty]|I understand that.|No, you don't.
You always say that.|No, you don't!
[Monty]|Did you check your jacket pocket?
What do I look like, a moron?.|No, if you remember|that one time--
Fine, Monty, fine.|If it'll make you happy, I'll check my jacket pocket.
It's in there.
[ Sighs ]
Uh, hello?. Excuse me.|Hey, how's it goin'?.
Ah, who are you?.|Jason Shepherd.
Remember me?.|I wrote Big Fat Liar.
Ah-- [ Laughs ]
Monty, hold my calls.
Give me a few minutes alone|here with Mr. Shepherd.
Well, well, well.
Jason Shepherd!|The young man from Greenbury, Michigan.
I must tell you,|this is quite a surprise.|What can I do for you, amigo?.
I want you to call my dad|and tell him you stole the story from me.
Call your dad?. Why?.
Because it's the truth, and you're|the only one he'll believe.
You traveled halfway|across the country...
to get me to call your dad|and tell him you did your homework?.
You make that phone call,|and you will never hear from me again.
- Okay.|- Really?.
Yup.
It's a great piece ofwork, kid.|And I'm not just blowing smoke.
I refer back to it whenever|I get in a bind on the script.
So you'll give it back to me|and make the phone call?.
Hey, you gave me my movie.|It's the very least I can do for you.
Hey...|you smoke cigars, hotshot?.
I'm... 1 4, Wolf.
All right, suit yourself.
Jason Shepherd|ofGreenbury, Michigan--
Ahh. It was a pleasure|doing business with ya.
- Oh! What have I done?.|- No! No!
Stand back, son! Let me try and|tamp it out with this lit cigar.
Oh, I seem to be|making matters worse.
Good move!
Hold on, help is on the way.
Stand back!
Oh! Ohhh.
You're sick!|You know that?.
All I wanted you to do was call my dad|and tell him I wrote that paper!
Or else what?. You gonna|shoot me with a spitball, hmm?.|Gonna give me a wedgie?.
Grow up, Shepherd!|This is Hollywood, baby.|It's a dog-eat-dog town.
Worse. We got cats eatin' cats.|We got fish munchin' fish.
We play by our own rules.|[ Chuckling ]
I am not leaving|until you make that call!
Oh, I'll make a call, all right.|Malone speaking.
Rocco, this is the Wolf.|Senda couple of your boys|down here. I got a Code "W"
Another angry writer|refusing to leave. Wolf out.
- I tried to play fai r, Wolf,|but you asked for it!|- [ Fake Whimpering ]
You asked for it. You don't|know who you're messing with!|Come on!
Thanks for holding.|Can you spell Soderbergh for me?.
Thanks, Steven.|I'll have Mr. Wolf return.|[Phone Ringing]
Marty Wolf Pictures.|[Jason ]|No,you don't understand!
Let go! I'm telling you.|It was my idea.
Oh, yeah, and I wrote|The Nutty Professor.|I heard it all before.
Uh... hi.
Hey, Astrid. Adam Sandler|called to set up a lunch.
I sent some flowers|to Meg Ryan 'cause she|sounded like she had a cold.
Oh, and I scheduled|a deep body massage for you at 3:.00.
You look like you can use|a little "you" time.
Thank you, kind stranger.
What can I say?.|This is Hollywood, Kaylee.|It's a fish-eat-fish town.
They play by their own rules out here.
Does that mean we're going home?.|We're going home... as soon as|Wolf admits he stole my story.
I'm not trying to be negative,|but didn't we just find out Wolf|isn't going to admit the truth?.
He'll do it.|How?.
'Cause I have his life|in the palm of my hand.|Great, so we're stealing now.
We're not stealing.|We're borrowing.
I've got Wolf's alarm codes,|credit card numbers, his schedule.
So?.|So this is awesome.
Give me one day and I'll figure out|a way to use this info against him.
I don't know,Jas.
I can't go home|until my dad knows the truth.
If you saw the way|he looked at me. It was like--
I don't know.|Like I wasn't his kid anymore.
Do you think your plan|might include food|and a place to sleep?.
The guard!|Let's get outta here!
Let's check out|that warehouse.
Looks like we found|our temporary home.
[Kaylee ]|Look at all this stuff.
Oh!
All right, Kay, we're gonna need|clothes and supplies.|Let's hunker down...
until the law dogs punch out,|and start racking up the merch.
What are you talking about?.
We'll stay here until closing time|and then we go shopping.
# The party's just begun#
# Everybody's having fun#
# Why don't we run away #
# And play some one-on-one #
# Let's find a place|just you and me #
# With no one around#
# Where we can be|who we wanna be #
# And no one brings us down #
# I, I wish|this night would never end#
# I, I wish|this night would never end#
# We're on our own|Just me and you #
# No one around#
# Where we can do|what we wanna do #
# I hope we're never found#
# I, I wish|this night would never end#
# I wish this night|would never end##
[ Knocking Sound]
J as?.
I 'm at the beach.
Hey, Frank. Mr. Stroog.|Meet us at the studio gate in 20.
- Hey.|- [ Panting ]
- What's with the Cokes?.|- The machine, it's rigged.|They're free.
[ Hysterical Laughing ]|They're free!
[Jason ] Good morning, Frank.|Let's get moving.
We've got furs to sell.|Yeah.
Fur coat king of|the Midwest, my butt!
I've got some R-rated|dialogue for you,|but I'm gonna keep it P.G.
I'm gonna keep it P.G.|You owe me $1 00|for yesterday's ride.
- Maybe--|- You almost cost me my job.
- I'm sorry, I can explain.|- D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D! Hear that?.
-Just--|- D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D!
- Maybe if we--|- I don't wanna hear it. Okay?.
- I know, I just--|- D-D-D-D-D-D-D!
- If you--|- D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D!
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"Big Fat Liar" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 31 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/big_fat_liar_4044>.
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