Bite Marks Page #3

ten minutes of the remake were...

Hey, how much did you pay to see the remake?

Twelve bucks? Kind of expensive

for ten good minutes, huh?

Mmmmm... yeah...

Two fingers!

What's happening?

Oh, not much. We're

just trapped inside your truck

with Monster Central outside.

How are things with you, Mr. Seizure?!

What?!

Do you have a weapon?

No.

Did you guys see that?

Their vampires!

Or atheists.

Good thing my brother's a bible thumper.

Will those keep them out?

Vampires fear the cross.

Not in FRIGHT NIGHT.

You had to believe in it.

Well, trust me, there's nothing

I believe in more, right now.

They might not be able to get in anyway,

without being invited.

That didn't work in

THE RETURN OF COUNT YORGA.

Of course not! That was

American International.

So?

So each movie makes its own rules!

None of it is grounded in reality!

I saw one get killed by a bolt of lightning

in THE SCARS of DRACULA.

Now THAT is just stupid!

If either of ya mentions TWILIGHT,

I'll throw you out the cab!

Gideon.

What am I supposed to do with this?

Will this really keep them out?

Bet they won't be able to touch

the glass with these pages up.

How do we see out?

Well, that's simple. We

just tear a little piece off.

I'm not sure if we're keeping them out,

or if they've got us trapped in.

I bet I can get a message out.

No way I'm staying in here

til dawn with a couple of...

A couple of "what?"

Breaker, Breaker. This is-...

this is Red Rocket. Anybody copy?

Red Rocket?

Shut up.

Breaker, Breaker, this is Red Rocket.

I got a ten-thirty-three here. Anybody copy?

Breaker one-twenty, you got Sick Nick here.

What's y'alls ten-thirty-three?

Yes! Sick Nick, we are being attacked

by some real boogeymen.

Can you send bear patrol?

Say again Red Rocket, you're breakin on me.

This is Red Rocket.

Me and a couple of... good

buddies, are under attack.

We need assistance.

Damn it! They cut the power.

Vogel! Do you still have the cell phone?

Probably used up the battery.

Battery's good. Signal's good.

Nine-one-one!

You have to give them our address.

Cell phones don't have pinpoint capability.

Where are we?

Seven-oh-three Opal Road.

Oh wait! I got em!

Hello? Yes, this is an emergency!

We're being attacked by a pro-life group.

Can you send help?

Great! The address is

seven-oh-three Opal... hello? Hello?

You're cutting in and out.

Seven-oh-three Opal... hello?

It's all this scrap metal.

It's messing with the signal.

Oh, no. Oh, damn it.

What is it?

I have to pee.

Can't you hold it?

I been holding it for the last six hours!

My back teeth are swimming!

What if one of those things gets in?

Here... here...

Position yourself by the dash.

Okay. When I say "go", open

the door a few inches.

A few inches?

Shut up!

Okay, go.

Are you going or not?

Can you not look at me? I'm pee shy.

What the hell caused that?

What was in this?

You said to give him

water. It was all I could find.

"Blessed by Father Fisher."

Good thing my brother is a Jesus freak.

So... what do we do now?

We wait.

For what?

Dawn.

I know you saw us.

I know you stayed and watched.

I even know what you won't admit.

I've known from the moment you picked us up.

Nice.

You like that? Good buddy?

It's okay. You don't have to answer.

I've got your answer right here.

You want me to go further?

Say "please." Do it!

Say... " please."

Please...

What are you doing?

My turn.

I can't do that, man.

Yes, you can.

I just can't.

Fair's play, buddy.

Besides... it doesn't mean anything.

I'm not...

I know. You just need a little... push.

What's happening?

Mo's Garage! Anybody here?

It's the mechanic!

Hey! Hey! Hey, buddy!

Anybody here?

Sh*t! Look!

He doesn't see him!

Hey! Hey, behind you!

What are you doing?

YouTube.

C'mon, damn it. You dragged my ass out here.

Where are you?

Look, it's cold and it's wet

and it's after midnight,

and I'm in no mood to deal with this sh...

Are you... the one with... The problem?

Heeeey! Hey! Why doesn't he hear us?

Here! Maybe I can signal him with this!

Hey! It's a chick!

Looks like a guy to me.

No, it's a chick! And she's smokin!

Hey!

I saw a guy.

It's a woman! I swear!

No, I saw him, too.

Only... through there it was a guy, and here

and in the mirror, it was a girl.

How is that possible?

Hey, didn't you say we were

seven-oh-three Opal Road?

Yeah, why?

Look at the GPS.

What the hell's going on around here?

Wait a minute. We saw

a vampire girl in a mirror.

And?

No, you don't get it.

We saw a VAMPIRE girl in a mirror!

Right! Right! You can't

see a vampire in a mirror!

But we did!

Exactly! We're acting as

though this is a movie!

But it's not! It's real

life! Movie rules don't apply!

So... you can see vampires in a mirror?

Yeah... but as they really are!

Face to face, you see them

the way they want you to!

Or... the way you want them to!

It's just after three.

Another... two... two and

a half hours til dawn.

What I don't get is...

With all these sucker-f***ers

around, why did only one

vampire attack the mechanic?

Why didn't they gang fang him like they

did McDougall?

I think I know. I think I know!

What are you doing!

Watch!

Bite me.

Cary, no!

Go on! Bite me, you plasma-sucking p*ssy!

Look in the mirror.

I thought you said we

can see them in the mirror.

We can. As they really are.

So, if they're not in the mirror...

They're... not really there?

Bingo! Go away.

How many coffins did you see

back in the trailer?

Five.

Because that's how many

you expected there to be.

How many did we see?

One.

Because that's how many there really was!

We didn't know there was supposed to be five,

so we only saw what was really there!

I get it! This thing's been

diddlin' with our mind-knobs!

Right! The wrong address on the GPS,

all the vampires on McDougall,

why we saw a man attack the

mechanic and not the girl...

It's been making us see

what it wants us to see!

And that's why they stopped every time we did

when we were dragging

Brewster back to the truck.

They couldn't catch up to us, otherwise,

we'd know they weren't real!

Exactly!

See? All in our minds!

Pull me in!

Pull me in! Pull me in!

Okay, this is sick! We gotta get out of here!

Have you checked your cell phone lately?

We need clearer reception!

Okay, here's what we do,

one of us takes the phone,

moves around the junkyard

until he gets a good signal.

The other two will lead Chickula

away to keep him off phone boy.

Who's gonna take the phone?

The one who's most responsible.

Okay, Cary, now after you call the cops,

get your ass back here,

honk the horn three times,

and we'll come running.

Let's go!

I don't like this plan.

What!

We're gonna deliberately

attract Fang Girl's attention?

What if she shows up?

I can't be rescued if I'm six quarts empty.

Okay, we'll arm ourselves.

Oh, yeah.

Listen... if you do this, l will...

Deal! Now, you said something about weapons?

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