Blockers Page #6

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Okay, cool. Let's go.

We're going to the lake house.

I am not sure that this

was worth $85.

- Where's Chad?

- What?

Oh, he's probably out

on the dance floor.

I'm gonna go find him

and meet you guys outside.

- All right.

- Okay.

The f***?

Smirking little piece of sh*t.

- Top knot. Top knot.

- Let's get him.

Yeah, you guys go do that.

I'm gonna get some punch.

All right, a**hole,

what'd you do with my daughter?

Two of you guys have

the same shitty haircut?

Hey.

Look at me.

My hair's too long.

Hey. You can't go around

assaulting children.

You have to blend in if you

want some information, okay?

So just... just be cool.

God.

Okay.

Julie?

Julie?

Nothing lasts forever

But we won't know

till we try...

Prom night, huh?

What?

Just... just special night.

(cheering and whooping)

You make me

feel so alive...

Got to try.

You make me

feel so alive...

- Chad?

- Yeah.

Oh...

One for the money

Give me all your money

Oh...

This is my moment.

One for the money

We gonna make you

lose control

(yelling in pain)

We gonna make you

lose control...

You ruined my moment!

F*** your moment.

- What happened back there?

- What happened is that...

is that my daughter was kissing

Chad even though she hated it.

And I've been dragged

into this situation

- by you two f***ing idiots.

- Just ignore him.

- Great idea.

- We're gonna go to Austin's house.

Julie said that's where

the after-party is,

- and we'll get 'em there.

- And that sounds like a plan.

Hey, how dare you ignore me.

We are in this situation

because you two

raised a couple of bigots

who have shamed my daughter

into losing her virginity

to the wrong sex.

Shame.

My daughter is not a bigot.

(scoffs, chuckles)

We go to all of the marches.

We went to the Tax Day March,

and nobody goes to that sh*t.

- Nobody.

- Ignore him.

- It's hard.

- Yeah, it is hard.

'Cause I don't quit.

And now I have

to go rescue Sam,

okay, because she is scared

and confused,

and I know what it's like

to be ostracized by society

for your sexual preferences.

Sleeping with women

that aren't your wife

isn't a sexual preference.

No, it is. I prefer them.

- (music blaring from inside)

- MITCHELL:
How parents can let

their kids play music

this loud.

We all share this planet.

This is how loud I listen

to my music, dawg.

Probably won't even

be able to hear us.

(doorbell ringing)

It's so dark in there.

You know, they... okay,

they could be in the backyard

playing two-on-two hoops.

I don't know.

HUNTER:

Oh!

Oh, I found a big window.

Oh, no, no, no,

don't, don't, don't.

Trust me. Do not look

in that window.

- What?

- Just look at me. Do not look in this window.

Do not look

in this f***ing window.

Julie's red dress.

- Yeah.

- Oh, sh*t.

You know, I know... I know this

must be tough for you.

I mean, if... hell, if that

was Kayla in there, I'd...

- I'd-I'd kill myself.

- Nope.

That's the wrong thing

to f***ing say right now.

- Stop them. Stop it.

- I can't...

(stammers) Wait.

Hey. It's not Julie.

- It's not Julie. (laughs)

- MITCHELL:
What?

LISA:
Oh, sh*t.

It's Austin's parents.

- Good for them.

- LISA:
They're really...

really going at it.

I always wanted to do this.

I've always wanted

to watch people have sex.

Oh, my God,

he's yanking her hair.

Ow. That looks like it hurts.

Yeah, we shouldn't

be looking, man. Come on.

MITCHELL:
She runs the risk

of, like, dislocating her hip.

Hey, Mitchell. You're being

a f***ing perv, dude.

Don't look.

(grunting and moaning)

(yelling)

(screams, gasps)

What happened?

We locked eyes,

and then he finished.

It means his load

is on your soul for eternity.

- MITCHELL:
Holy sh*t.

- LISA:
Oh, sh*t, he's coming.

(Hunter stammering)

I'll pretend I'm a plant.

Mitchell? What are you doing?

- What, Lisa?

- Hey, Ron.

(chuckling):
What are you guys

doing out here?

Hi.

- LISA:
Hey.

- What a nice surprise.

We thought the kids were here.

We didn't realize you guys

were here, uh...

Oh, Cath and I were just having

a little, uh,

prom night role play.

- You know, to keep the sex life alive.

- Prom night.

- That kind of thing.

- Where are the kids?

Um, do you know

where the kids are?

The kids are at

Kyler Montero's lake house.

- How do you know that?

- Because Austin told us.

Yeah. He's texted me

like 19 times tonight.

- Ugh. Oh, my God.

- Yeah, we tell each other everything.

- It's unbelievable.

- I mean, he-he knows about prom night.

- CATHY:
Well, you know.

- I'm sorry, you...

you tell your son about

your sex games with your wife?

- Uh-huh. Yeah.

- Wow, that's...

- Can't do that.

- Yeah, it's weird.

- It's so... it's-it's weird.

- There's a line.

- We have a very open family here.

- Yes, we do.

- We don't hide anything.

- LISA:
You know what?

What is Kyler's address?

I-I... Okay, listen,

I-I feel like

I can't betray

Austin's confidence in me,

and frankly,

if Julie wanted to tell you

where the house was,

she would have told you.

- Uh-uh.

- Uh, I got...

Hold on, hold on.

Buh-buh-buh.

Give us the address,

or my giant friend's

gonna tear

- your husband's dick off.

- Yeah.

Uh... no, I'm not.

- No, I'm not. No, no, no.

- Excuse me? - What?

That's... that's good.

And, uh, sorry

to interrupt your evening.

I hope you guys enjoy

the rest of your lovemaking.

- Ow! F***!

- Come on.

- What was that about?

- What?

Hey, man, thank you for killing

- my daughter's hymen.

- I don't think so.

Kyler Montero's lake house?

Marcie did the bathroom.

She's gonna know the address,

so let's just go.

- All right, dope.

- Dope.

(whooping)

- Ow, my eyes!

- Yeah!

RUDY:

Okay, come on in now.

It's all fun and games

until there's a decapitation.

I don't need any more

dead girls on my conscience.

I'm sorry, Rudy.

We just had to check that off

the old prom bucket list.

- (laughter)

- Oh, my God, Sam!

- Come here. Yeah.

- Move, Chad!

- Chad, you want a drink?

- No.

What you got there?

This is a very, very special

reduced hash oil

of my own invention.

It has rosemary essence

for blood flow,

a curcumin extract

from turmeric

to reduce inflammation,

and it gets you super baked.

(chuckles) All right.

Let's do it.

Do I just... I suck?

Yeah, you press the button,

then you take, like,

a little puff.

Or a really, really big one.

Okay. (chuckles)

And then you just hold it

for, like, a beat.

You guys know

that Tanner Dunn's parents

rented out a whole floor

of the Park West Hotel

for an after-party?

- What?

- (Sam chuckles)

Um... yeah, he, uh...

I guess they're super loaded

and they're still proud of him

even though it took him

like six years to graduate.

I remember him.

He got to, uh, miss school

- when his kid was born.

- Yeah, yeah, that guy.

You should definitely

let it go now.

- Holy sh*t. (chuckles)

- Oh, yeah.

I can run a six-minute mile.

My lung capacity is legit.

- No!

- One more selfie, and this time,

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