Boo! A Madea Halloween Page #10

some kind of common criminal?

Well, that's all you had to say,

I got you on that, Ma.

- Me too, girl, you know I know how...

- Wait! Wait!

Are we just gonna leave the girl

in the house with the clown?

Listen, let me tell you

right now, that's Joe's grandchild.

I ain't got nothing to do with her.

She already got a nasty attitude,

it's every clown for himself.

Hotwire this.

Oh, Joe, don't do that!

The hell?

Joe, what the hell is wrong with you?

Hey.

The hell is wrong with you? I was about

to bust your face with this damn gun.

I don't know where the hell

you think you're going.

You left these in the house. You left

your purse and everything up in there.

- Here.

- Give me my keys.

Where are you going without them?

- I don't know.

- Hello?

And this phone of yours

been ringing off the hook.

- Hello?

- I was up in there...

Burning up your minutes

and somebody's on the phone.

- Is anybody there?

- Who is it on the phone?

It's some preacher on the phone

working on my nerve!

Hell! Preacher. Pray for that.

- Here.

- What?

Leave me the hell alone.

I'm going to lay down.

- Who is this?

- Don't answer that, Ma!

Mabel, don't answer that.

I saw it in a movie.

When you answer that thing,

the little girl...

When she answered the phone,

she got dead.

I remember that.

She said "Hello" and that thing said,

"Are you in the house alone?"

- I remember that.

- Yes.

Don't answer.

It's all right.

- Don't answer it!

- Don't.

- Don't answer it.

- Hello?

But I hear somebody.

- Is anybody there?

- You say there's somebody...

Who is it?

Who the hell is it?

- This is Reverend Walker.

- Hey, Reverend.

- Hello, Madea.

- Reverend, look here.

If you calling to pray for me,

I ain't got no time for that right now.

- Well, a little prayer would be good.

- Bam, hush.

Okay, go and pray, Rev, go and pray.

- Oh, Lord.

- Praise Jesus!

Help us all to find peace!

I'm gonna make him pray harder,

watch this.

Hallelujah!

Hallelujah! Wool!

He prayed harder.

Come bring your...

Look he started...

He started prayin' hard.

What is it, Reverend?

All right, enough.

Amen, Jesus wept. What is it?

Have you seen Aday?

No, she's up in the house with...

- No, she's not. No.

- She's not?

- I know you lying to me.

- No, I'm not.

Reverend, please don't

make me cuss on this phone.

- You need to come to the church.

- Okay, fine.

- Come on down to the church.

- Thank you. Thank you.

- Madea. Now, Madea, come on...

- Well, what the Rev want?

That girl snuck out of this house

and went down to that frat party.

That damn Tiffany done lied again!

The Reverend want me to come over to

the church so he can talk to me.

That won't be a bad idea at all.

A little prayer won't hurt

nobody right now.

Barn, I'm not going up

in there for no prayer.

I'm going up in there

to set this straight.

This child, she gonna need

more than a little prayer.

She gonna need the damn clown

and everything in there to help her

when I get back here,

I'm telling you right now.

'Cause I'm not gonna deal with this.

And Mr. Wilson and a clown, that's

gonna be the least of her worries.

Well, wait a minute, Ma, we just gonna

leave the girl up in there, right there?

What the hell else we gonna do?

I'm not going

back up in there to get her.

What the hell?

Go on somewhere with that, clown.

Coming up here with that bullshit.

Go on, clown, go on.

Ain't nothing over there,

that's it, I'm telling you.

There ain't nobody in here with me.

That's what I know.

Like that?

Yeah.

I don't play that Halloween bullshit!

Blowing my damn high,

coming up in here with a clown costume.

I did that already tonight.

- Mabel!

- Yeah.

Got me going

out here to church, you know?

And that damn Aday

wasn't even up there.

You wait till I get back home,

deal with that girl.

That's crazy as hell.

She is something else, Mabel.

I'm gonna fix her though, she's...

That clown gonna be the least of

her worries when I get back there.

Well, Mabel,

we good for going to the church

and that's all right because

we gonna need a little prayer.

What the hell?

What the hell's wrong

with this thing?

- Mabel!

- Mabel! Jesus!

What the hell is wrong with it?

I don't know, I'm pressing the gas.

Oh, now it's goin'...

Now it's goin' backwards.

What in hell wrong with it?

" Ma!

' Stop it!

What the hell is wrong with it?

Put it in drive.

Baby, don't cut it off!

I didn't cut the damn car off,

it just killed, damn!

The hell is wrong with this thing?

Let me look up under the hood.

I told you, I know Joe

did something to my damn car,

that's why I never let him

go borrow my car.

Ma, we gonna wait right here for you.

Hattie, get your ass out of the car,

come help me. Bam, get out.

Mabel, I'm not getting

out of this car right now.

It takes two people

to open this hood.

Come on, help me open it.

Ma, we caught here

in these damn woods!

- Come, help me open the hood, girl.

- Oh, Lord.

Help me open, you've got to pry it up.

Come on, on the count of three.

Count of three. Look. One, two, three.

Whoo! Yeah!

When's the last time

you had this thing serviced?

1972, when I bought it.

What's wrong with it?

We don't know, Barn, hell,

we just got out the car!

- The hell's wrong with her?

- Ma, I'm scared out here.

You scared in the house,

you scared in the dark, hush.

Ain't nothing out here.

No, you know I don't like to be out here

in the dark in these here woods.

Nothing wrong with these woods,

hell, ain't nothing out there.

Hattie, just hush.

Shh!

Is everybody all right?

Barn, we fine. Hell, we fine,

would you please be quiet?

Damn, what the hell wrong with her?

Mabel.

I hear something out there.

You don't hear nothing, Hattie. Hell.

Look, is this the carburetor?

I don't know nothing about

working on no car.

Ma.

Madea!

Oh, jeez! Oh! Madea!

What the hell's wrong with you?

- Madea!

- What? What you running for?

Oh, hell, Oh, hell. Hell!

Madea! Madea!

Madea!

- Madea!

- Hattie!

Mabel! Mabel! Wait for me!

Help me, Jesus! Help me, Jesus!

Help me, Jesus!

Help me, Jesus! Help me, Jesus!

Help me, Jesus!

I need Jesus!

Oh, Lord, somebody help me,

I just need Jesus,

come, somebody pray for me.

What'd I do, what'd I do?

Somebody just needs to pray for me.

Oh, I need Jesus! I need...

You can't smoke in here, Madea.

Okay, but didn't Moses

have a burning bush?

I need the lamb of God.

Would you like to be saved, darling?

Oh, yes, I wanna be saved,

will that help me?

Oh, praise the Lord,

Hallelujah, that's wonderful!

Now do you believe that

Jesus is the son of God?

If I have to, that's what

I'm gonna believe.

Just, I just need y'all to help me.

And you confess your sins?

Up in here with all these

children up in here?

Honey, you don't want me confessing

my sin up in here around these men.

I'll have all of them blushing.

You don't know what I used to

do back in the day, baby!

Wasn't no fun. Bam!

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