Boo! A Madea Halloween Page #11

Pray for me.

Well, not to Sister Alice,

not to anybody in here, but to Him.

You just confess with your mouth

and believe in your heart,

and you shall be saved,

it's that simple.

Oh, just like that

and all my problems go away,

ain't gonna be no more demons

following me and there's monkeys

and everything walking behind me?

Well, getting saved doesn't mean

all your troubles won't come,

but it'll help you when it do.

I'm a living witness now.

I confess that Jesus is son of God.

I believe. Sha-na-na!

Yes, I believe, help me.

Am I saved? I'm saved now!

- Yes...

- Yes, I'm saved!

Yes, praise the Lord, I'm saved.

Yes, Hallelujah. Thank you.

Them demons that I keep seeing

and monkeys and clowns...

They've been following you. I know.

Reverend, you anointed just like TDJ.

How you know that, Reverend?

How you know that?

Uh... Aday told me.

How she know that?

Baby, you got the gift like Joel Osteen,

you got the gift, baby?

I have a confession. I...

We snuck out of the house

and went to the frat party.

I'm so sorry, Madea.

I already asked the Lord

for forgiveness.

But when you came

to the party and shut it down,

the frat guys got so mad.

And they wanted to prank you.

They hacked into the TV.

The lights. The plumbing.

That was all them.

I heard them talking about it

when the police came to shut it down.

And when you were in the car

and the zombies came out of the woods,

that was them.

Yes, ma'am.

Come on, get some holy water. Come on.

Jesus working on her,

Hallelujah, Hallelujah.

- Now hold that.

- Hallelujah, Jesus.

No, no, them words is about to come

out of my mouth, but I'm in a church!

- Come on, now, hold it. Hold.

- You better...

Oh, Lord.

Sorry, these words trying to

come up out of my...

Don't cuss, Madea, you in a church,

hold yourself. Don't cuss.

- I bind you, cussing demon!

- Bind him.

Cussing demon, I bind you!

You trying to tell me right now,

that that was them children

that did that?

To me? And the clown?

That was them.

And the movement in the attic.

I'm sorry, Miss Madea.

You ain't nowhere near

as sorry as them

frat boys about to be

for what they done did to me.

No, no, Miss Madea, Tiffany has

some responsibility in this, I'm sorry.

I'm gonna tell you right now.

I'm going over there and I'm gonna burn

that place down. I'm going right now!

You just got saved, Miss Madea.

Sometimes getting saved

is like a bad perm, Reverend...

It just don't take.

Now where them boys at?

I'm going over there

to get them right now.

Uh... Uh... Miss Madea...

Reverend, I know

you ain't grabbing on me.

I know you ain't...

Do you want them holy hands?

Do you want your holy hands, Reverend?

I think you just need to calm down.

The Bible says to turn the other cheek.

Yes, but the Bible

talks about these cheeks.

What about the cheeks

down at the bottom?

Those are the ones I'm going after

'cause I'm gonna tell you right now.

What they done did is just absolute,

flat-out wrong.

I'm going over there and set it off.

No, no, no. Miss Madea,

there's gotta be some other way

to teach them a lesson.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Ma, you ain't had

to leave us like that.

I know y'all knew where to come.

They came straight to the church,

didn't they?

Listen. Hold on. I just

found out what happened.

It was them frat boys, but listen to me.

I got this. Rev, you might be right.

There might be something

we can go over there and do

- and get all this straight.

- Yes.

I got... I got an idea.

I'm going to try something

very different.

This is what we gonna do...

I oughta bust you...

Joe, you ain't gonna

believe this.

You ain't gonna believe

what them frat boys did.

Yeah, I know everything.

I know everything, look here.

I... Hold the hell on.

Look at him.

So y'all wanna play games

with old people, huh?

What is your name, son?

Urn, I'm Renaldo,

but everybody calls me Horse.

Horse? Ooh, can I ride?

- Hattie, please, damn.

- Hattie, hush.

I'm gonna tell you

one more time, Hattie,

you keep talking to him like that,

you ain't getting no more

of this damn donkey.

So y'all like to play games, huh?

What is wrong with y'all?

I'm sorry, we don't wanna get

kicked out of school, please.

You worried about

getting kicked out of school,

you about to get your ass kicked.

I'm gonna get all this

straight right now.

Y'all wanna play these games?

I'm calling Brian.

- I'm calling right now.

- Yeah.

Madea, how you doing?

Brian, you ain't gonna never believe

what your daughter did.

I need you to come home right now.

Madea, I don't...

I don't care what you're doing,

if you don't get here right now,

you ain't gonna have no house.

- Yes, we gonna get it.

- No, I'm good.

- Right now.

- Okay, great.

And then she just snuck up

out of this house.

That's exactly what she...

Snuck up out of this house, Brian.

I cannot believe that...

I think that you need to just

shut the hell up and listen, boy.

Right. You need to get that girl to

come down here and put your foot down.

Okay. All right.

But what do I say to her?

You grab her by the throat,

you say, "Look here, you little..."

Daddy, if you say something

bad about my daughter...

Joe, don't you call that child

no bad name, hush.

Call her.

You need to call her down here

and set this thing straight.

Get this child in order,

she is running all over you.

You need to get her in order.

- Okay. Tiffany!

- What?

Honey, can you come downstairs, please?

What the hell you doing?

Boy, what the hell wrong with you?

Call her from your nuts.

Well, now that may be how it sounds,

Joe, 'cause, he only got one.

Boy, I'm trying to help you.

I'm trying to help you.

You're sitting here

like a little me-otch.

Stop using that language

in my house, okay?

Listen up, everybody here.

I'll try this my way,

and if it doesn't work,

then I will resort to 1938,

where you beat the hell out of your kids

and everything was okay.

All right? I'll get arrested.

I'll have warrants.

I'll be like you guys.

I'm running from the police.

I'm running from the po-po.

I don't live that way.

Nigga. Nigga. Your way ain't never work.

We trying to tell you the way

we did it in the old school.

All this new sh*t ain't working.

That's why all these children

killing each other.

That's why all these children

ain't got no respect for nobody.

This new sh*t don't work.

Tiffany!

Tell her you better get your ass down

them steps right damn now.

Get down these stairs right now,

your dad would like to talk to you,

have a conversation about some of

your behavior, young lady.

Find your way down these stairs,

right now.

Look, she's coming. See? Duh.

What?

Girl, did that child say, "What"?

Oh, somebody help me,

y'all better hold me.

Somebody better hold me.

Tiffany, hear me clearly

and answer this question, okay?

Be very careful with your answer.

All right?

'Cause your life may depend on it. Um...

Did you sneak out of this house

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