Boo 2! A Madea Halloween Page #3

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Yeah, you're the reason we can't have

a Halloween party this year.

- What?

- Yeah, we can't have a party this year.

You just said you were

working on the guest list.

Well, yeah, but we can't have a party here

at the frat house anymore.

Why not? Because of me?

No, 'cause of global warming.

Yeah, 'cause of you.

It's because of your dad

and his old gangster friends.

Okay, look. She's sorry.

No party. Okay, cool. Let's go, okay?

- Bye, guys, see you later.

- But see, the thing is...

Adis.

...my birthday's today,

Halloween is tomorrow.

I'm just sad that

I messed it up for you guys.

I'm sorry.

Bro.

[DINO] ID. Fork it over. Come here.

- Put it right there. All right, let's see.

- There you go.

- Wow.

- Is she?

- I'm not good at math.

- She's definitely hot.

What do you say, 18 now?

- Eighteen.

- [DINO] Fake.

Probably. It's all right.

Whatever. I don't care.

[DINO] Here you go.

[SIGHS] I just wish

I could make it up to you.

[DINO EXCLAIMS]

[DINO] She just gonna throw it

at you like that?

No, she's not talking about it like that.

Sounds like she was to me.

You're so gross.

I just hate that you guys aren't having

a party this year.

You know, I could show you guys that I...

I actually know how to have fun.

Well...

Don't do it, dude. I'll do it.

- Don't do what?

- Whatever he's saying not to do.

- I don't know.

- What is that?

We are having a party!

[CHUCKLES] I know.

I knew you were just kidding.

What time should I be here?

Oh, it's not here.

- No?

- Nope.

It's at Lake Derrick.

- [CHUCKLES]

- What?

- Yep.

- Bingo.

Are... Where the people

got killed making out?

Yep.

Are you crazy?

Oh, my God. This is gonna be so much fun.

Tell that to the people

who died there. It's not fun.

Yeah, you can't. 'Cause they're dead.

Look, it's gonna be super creepy and scary.

- But that's why it's gonna be lit!

- Yup.

[DINO] You're gonna regret this, bro.

And for that reason, I'm in.

- And that's why it's gonna be epic!

- Epic!

Epic!

Dude, what are you doing here?

[DINO] Seriously, dude, you're like 40.

Just graduate.

- Um, what time should I be there?

- Do you know how to get to Lake Derrick?

No, but I have a car

that has a GPS and Gabriella...

- Gabriella won't.

- ...will be there.

- I'm not going.

- Yes, you are.

- It'll be fun!

- No, no. Are you crazy?

Have you not learned your lesson already?

I'm not hanging around dead people.

All right, look. I'll text the

instructions on how to get there tonight.

Alongside a shirtless selfie

that I took this morning

and only sent to two other girls

that you can save as your wallpaper.

We'll see you at midnight.

- Midnight?

- [JONATHAN] Yeah.

We start at 12:
01 on Halloween.

I'm not about to go to this right now.

- Okay? Come on.

- See you there!

[SIRENS WAILING]

Stalker alert! Stalker alert!

Stalker alert! Everyone!

- Go, go, go!

- [BOYS CLAMORING]

I will not b*tch out. I will not b*tch out.

[HORN HONKING]

[SCREAMING] Bae!

- [ANNA SCREAMING] Bae!

- [GIRLS] Anna!

[ANNA] Baby! Bae!

- Anna, calm down.

- Anna! Anna!

Anna!

[ANNA] Why are you here?

We were just getting invited to the...

Library! To the library

with books and knowledge.

Are you guys lying to me, huh?

- No.

- You guys are lying to me.

No, there's knowledge in books

which are at the library.

How are you? Great parking job.

You crushed that.

Where's Horse?

Uh, probably shirtless,

taking a selfie in the bathroom

and stroking his hair?

Where's Jonathan?

Right next to him, high-fiving?

Where's Mikey, where's Byron,

where's my boyfriend? Where's everybody?

Anna, why are you here?

I've been calling Horse every single day,

day in and day out.

He won't respond, and I wanna know why.

Well...

I texted him 25 times in the last 30 minutes.

Just three bubbles.

What does that mean?

Somebody tell me what that means.

[QUINTON] You have really strong thumbs?

There he is. Baby!

- [GIRL] Anna!

- [GIRL 2] Anna! Stop!

[SCREAMING]

[ALL] Surprise!

It's just me. Everybody calm down. Calm down.

Do you kids mind?

Mind let us talk for a second?

Looks like you need to calm down.

[SIGHS] Yeah, it's this divorce.

Is it that bad?

I've been telling you about it

for years, man.

Yeah, it's that bad. She is that bad.

And be glad that your daughter loves you.

Come on. Tiffany loves you too.

She tolerates me, man.

There's a difference. She tolerates me.

It's all teenagers.

Teenagers. Yeah. Okay.

But how'd you get yours to be so responsible?

Well, me and Liz, we sit down,

give her a little space.

Sometimes, space works.

Yeah, well, she's got all the space

in the world now. You know why?

Her mother bought her a car.

Just bought her a car.

She's not responsible enough

to have a car. This woman...

[VICTOR] You just need

to sit down and talk with her.

It'll work out.

- Yeah, yeah.

- It's a car!

Yeah. Thanks, Dr. Phil.

Finish eating that dip.

Damn.

That's a nice little sports car

they done bought her. It's red.

Red, that means fire.

Bought her what looks

like a nice little car out there.

[BRIAN] Yeah, it is, isn't it?

Debrah bought her a nice car.

You bought her some headphones.

Why you let that ho do that to you?

Do not say that about my ex-wife, okay?

I don't want my son to hear that.

She's not a ho.

Ex-wife, old ho. Same thing.

Hear me good when I say this

to your ignorant ass, boy!

You don't let no ex-ho

show you up to your child.

You handle that! Do you understand?

Listen to what I'm saying. Call her up.

Do your pimp voice like

I used to do back in the day.

[CHUCKLING]

[HIGH-PITCHED] "Look here, ho."

[CHUCKLES]

That was my pimp voice. It had to be higher

so when you hit 'em low,

they didn't know what was comin'.

You understand?

She bought a car,

all you gotta do is walk up to her,

"You don't buy my daughter no damn car

unless I say it's okay.

You better take this car back

wherever the hell you got it from

or I'mma kick your ass!

You finna take this car back.

Your raggedy ass...

I shouldn't have married

you in the first damn..."

Excuse me?

[JOE MUTTERS]

Damn, she showed up

like Candyman, didn't she?

[CHUCKLES] Same thing I said.

What did you say?

I said, "Hey, baby, how you doin'?"

[CHUCKLES]

I'm fine.

You know, it's always good to see you.

Daddy?

You had the pony.

You didn't have the stallion.

Yeah, right. Come on, Calvin.

So, uh, who the hell is this?

Hattie, that's her new husband.

Oh, that's how y'all rollin' now?

That's how y'all doin' things?

You just gonna bring your piece up

and all through here?

That's how you go?

That's what the young folks do now.

That's how they all do.

Well, back in the day,

you would have got your ass whooped.

[JOE] Let me make sure I understand this.

Boy.

Boy.

You gonna stand there

and let this girl

bring this nigga up in your house?

Joe, watch your darn mouth, hush!

Have you ever in your life known anybody

that was able to watch their own mouth?

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