Bushwhacked Page #3

Hey, Boo Boo.

What's the matter? You lost?

No collar, must be a stray.

Spider, I don't think

that's a good idea.

Oh relax. He's a pussycat.

Uh, Spider, maybe you shouldn't.

Come on. Give me your paw.

He's sucking my thumb!

That's not the one I saw.

What?

That' not the one I saw!

Nice kitty!

My God, he's dead!

No, no he's not dead! It says in the manual. When you

are attacked by a bear, you are suppose to play dead.

Whoa, he's a monster!

Ohh... that's not good!

Spider!

I must say, that was an awesome

demonstration of how to handle a bear attack!

Spider?

What's he doing?

- Spider?

- Wake him up!

Auntie EM?

What happened?

You were attacked by

a giant grizzly bear!

Oh, but you played dead like a genius!

Yea, it was incredible!

Of course I did!

And I do not want to have to

show you guys that one again, ok?

Alright, now let's move out! Come on.

Move. Get out of here.

March on. March away!

March...

I'm alive!

Little tougher than the

StairMaster, eh, G-man? Heh.

Hey. Listen, iron balls.

You take your time!

I know guys like this Grabelski,

when the pressure's on, they crack.

Scouts chanting to the tune of " Sound Off.

" We sing and sing 'cause that's our thing.

You know this song will never end.

Cause when it's done we start again.

1, 2, 3, 4.

We're Troop 12, the scouts' top crew.

We're honest, kind, and real fun, too.

We yell hurrah, we yell hooray.

We run and dance and sing and play.

We do good deeds, we help our friends...

Alright! Knock it off!

What is that? "We run and

dance and sing and play"?

My mom kind of wrote the words.

Well, they suck! OK.

What?!

I got to pee, I got to pee!

So who's stopping you?

30 years of scouting tells me,

we've made up a good chunk of ground.

Hey! Ah, ha ha!

Oh, that's the ticket! A little

spritz of cool clean mountain rain!

Shake your lizard. Let it drain!

Move your hips and spell your name!

Send it straight and send it hard.,

Now a sword fight. Go! En garde!

I got some bad news for you, Palmer.

That ain't rain.

Eat your veggies. Eat your starches,

Lean back, boys! Golden arches!

Whew. Alright.

Now, flip 'em and zip

'em and let's get moving.

- Hey. You. Don't move!

Spider, we just pissed

on some guy's head!

- You!

Oh, fu... dge!

Run!

Running badge time!

Come on!

Let's get vertical!

Wait. You expect me to climb

up there with just my hands?

That's right doughboy!

That's how it's done.

Hey, how about when you get up

there, you throw me down a ladder?

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!

[Palmer] I think I pulled something.

Come on G-man! They're getting away.

Come on! Come on!

Put your left hand on the

rock, higher above your head.

Well, what are you

waiting for? Get going!

Spider, are you sure

that bridge is safe?

Why, what's the matter, you scared?

Let me tell you something, honey:

There's nothing wrong with being afraid.

Spider, I'm afraid, too!

Shut up, you gutless

worm, I'm talking to her!

Put your right foot up there!

Put the right.. No, the left! Your

feet are crossed! His feet are crossed.

Come on, we can't just

stand here, we gotta move!

I'll go first.

You will?

Let's go!

All of you, move it. Come on!

Hey guys...

It's easy!

Jeez, Gordy! Quit goofing around!

Gordy, you ok?

- We gotta move faster, man, come on!

- No!

Safety first. We got to go slow.

Safety?

Safety first.

I'll be right back!

Keep going!

Come on man! They're getting away!

- Help me up.

- How much do you weigh?

This guy weighs a damn ton!

Oh, no!

Run!

Run!

Go!

Run!

Run! Run! Go, go, go!

Go, go, go!

Move it, come on!

Faster, you little...!

Move it, come on, keep going!

Go!

Run!

Spider? Sir?

Fishman?

We got them!

Fishman, get over here!

I can't! I'm having a little vertigo!

I'm stuck!

I don't believe it!

Spider! Are you nuts?

Maybe, I am.

Now, get over here!

Stay with me, G-man! Stay with me!

Alright, here we go!

Goodbye, Grabelski!

Hello, one million!

Don't you dare! There's

a scout on that bridge!

Come on!

Get over here!

You may find this hard to believe,

but I am a little bit of a coward!

You are not a coward! You are

Milton Fishman, the superstud!

What?

Say that. Say.. "I'm Milton

Fishman, the superstud!"

It will give you courage.

"I'm Milton Fishman, superstud"

I'm Milton Fishman, superstud!

It's not working.

eww oof...!

Alright! That's it, Fishman.

Last thread.

It's been nice knowing you.

I'm Milton Fishman, superstud!

That's it!

Come on!

Come on!

Yeah!

Spider, I did it! I really did it!

I'm proud of you!

Now, Get the hell out of here!

Well, tracker man! What do we do now?

We got no choice.

Got to go around.

All right! Everybody stay calm.

We have no good news as of yet.

- Will you please be

quiet and let him speak?

And no news... No.

"No news... is no news!

unless it's good news.

but we have no news, so...

Good!

Spider...

I'm getting hungry!

Could we stop for a rest!

Wouldn't it be best if we

camped here for the night?

Alright, I guess we

bought ourselves some time.

Bought ourselves time for what?

Well, guys, we got to start a fire.

Better start looking for pinecones.

Pinecones?

It says in the manual, whenever your camp is surrounded

by green wood, always use pinecones to start your fire.

If the manual told you to stick your

weiner in a light socket, would you do it?

Check this thing out! It's huge!

Mine's huger!

Hey, guy's, there's

lots of them up here!

Look at this baby! Big as a football!

Hit me, hit me!

Go, go!

Alright!

4, 44!... 4, 44!

To me, Spider!

Red dog! Red dog! Hut! Hut! Hut!...

Deep!

Way back! Way back...

Nobody is open!

He's going to have to run it!

I don't think that's a pinecone...

Oh, Mother...

Ayyy!

You haven't had one of those seizures

for about 20 minutes, that's a good sign!

How does that feel?

Ahh, that's good! That's good. Ahh!

He didn't know the difference

between a beehive and a pinecone?

What are you thinking?

I don't know yet...

Davy Crockett, did

you catch anything yet?

That's right. Make jokes. That's

what's wrong with this country,

everybody wants it now.

Nobody, is willing to hunt

down, what they really need.

That's what I try to teach my kids.

To hunt down the goodness in life.

You might say, "I'm the thin tacky

line between morality and depravity. "

And friend,

there's no telling what kind of

depravity, Grabelski, is up to right now.

Here we go. Here we go.

Hey...

I got the tent up!

What are you working on?

It's a crystal diode receiver.

You know what that is, right?

Yes, of course I do.

Oh, yes...

That is a beauty.

That's the toolbox.

Well...

Guys!

Look what I got!

Whoa! What is this!

Bet you never seen anything

like that before huh, Barnhill?

Probably don't know anything about

the birds and the bees! Butthead.

Oh, and you do?

Yeah, that's right, I do.

Oh, yeah?

Well, than explain it to us?

Well, I...

I know it's about making babies...

And that it takes a man and a woman...

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