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Casting Couch Page #4
- YES, SIR.
- MILLI.
ANY FINAL QUESTIONS?
- LET'S MEET TONIGH IF YOU WANT TO
YEAH, YEAH
[upbeat pop punk music]
NO INHIBITIONS,
JUST LET GO:
YEAH:
- WHY?
- BECAUSE IT'S POWER.
BE A LOT EASIER:
IF I'M A PRODUCER AND NOT JUS AN ACTOR WITH A SAY IN CASTING.
ONE OR TWO?
- TWO.
- WAIT.
- WHAT?
- HOW ABOUT IF I'M THE PRODUCER
AND YOU'RE, LIKE,
A COPRODUCER?
- WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE?
AND RESEARCHING:
IN THIS INDUSTRY,
IS SORT OF LIKE A HEAD HONCHO.
IT WAS THE EXECUTIVE PRODUCER,
BUT THAT'S MORE OF A MONEY GUY,
AND COPRODUCER:
THE ONLY PRODUCER ON THIS THING
IF I'M ACTUALLY
GONNA PRODUCE IT.
KIND OF THING.
- FINE.
MAKE ME COPRODUCER.
- THANK YOU.
- YOU'RE SUCH
A RETARD SOMETIMES.
- OKAY, AND JOHNSON
IS EXEC, RIGHT?
- YES.
- OKAY.
AND THE CHARACTER DESCRIPTIONS.
- HEY, HEY
BABY, I KNOW
"OOH, BABY, I LIKE IT," YEAH
BABY, I KNOW YOU WAN TO PARTY NOW
- OKAY, GUYS.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M A LITTLE OFFENDED.
AND TWO BRUNETTES,
NO REDHEADS.
- OH, NO.
- OH, I'M JUST MESSING WITH YOU.
BUT YOU KNOW, IT MIGHT BE GOOD
NOT TO HAVE, LIKE, TWO BLONDES.
I MEAN, A LITTLE DIVERSITY
IS ALWAYS NICE.
YOUR BLONDE?
- F*** NO.
- HEY, CHASE, YOU WANT TO DATE
A REDHEAD INSTEAD?
- UH, YEAH, SURE.
WHATEVER.
- I FIGURE WHEN
HE DOESN'T REALLY CARE.
- REDHEAD, BLONDE,
I DON'T REALLY CARE.
BESIDES, IF I LIKE
FROM HIM ANYWAYS.
- HEY, HOW COME
I DON'T GET A GIRL?
- YOU NEVER SAID YOU WANTED ONE.
- WHY WOULDN'T I?
ONE MORE CHARACTER, CAN'T WE?
- I DON'T THINK SO.
HAVE TO CHANGE THE WHOLE STORY.
COOL?
- I GUESS.
- OKAY, NEWT, WHAT DO YOU LIKE?
- BIG-BOTTOM GIRLS.
- REALLY?
- REALLY?
- YEAH.
- IT'S TRUE.
- I WON'T ASK.
[bombastic drum music]
LOOKING AT LITERALLY THOUSANDS
OF FEMALE PICTURES AND RESUMES.
- I THINK I COULD
GET INTO CASTING.
- I HELPED THEM NARROW IT DOWN
[drum cadence]
FOR TODAY.
TO READ FOR THE ROLE OF "ABBY,"
THE ULTRA-SLUTTY
HOT ASIAN WHORE.
OH, YEAH.
[clicks tongue]
- GUYS, UP FIRST,
THIS IS AMBER.
all:
HI, AMBER.- HI.
SO WHENEVER YOU'RE READY.
- OKAY.
I BROUGHT A SURPRISE FOR JENNY.
- WHAT?
- NO ONE SAID THE SCRIP WAS AWARD-WORTHY.
- WHAT?
WHY?
THIS ISN'T A BACHELORETTE PARTY.
- WELL, SHE NEEDS
TO GET HER MIND OFF IT SOMEHOW.
- WE WEREN'T SHOOTING
- TRUST ME, RACHEL.
YOU'LL BE HOOKED.
AND I DIDN' HAVE TO WORK FOR IT.
- SHE WASN'T BAD.
- HI, EVERYBODY.
[whistles blowing,
cow bell dings]
[baby coos]
- NOW WE'RE TALKING.
- WHENEVER YOU'RE READY.
- I DID. I DID.
- WE DID, ACTUALLY.
- WELL, I TRIED.
- WE TRIED.
- WHENEVER YOU'RE READY.
[gasps]
- O.M.G.
YOU HAVEN'T HEARD?
- HEARD WHAT?
[whispering] GAY.
- SHUT UP.
- SHE TOLD ME SHE SAW HIM KISS
ANOTHER GUY.
THROWING HER THIS SLUMBER PARTY.
- THAT'S AWFUL.
- I KNOW, RIGHT?
- THANKS.
- NO.
THANK YOU.
THAT SHE CAN'T ACT?
SHE CAN ACT HOWEVER SHE WANTS.
- WE AREN'T CASTING
FOR THEIR TALENT.
- NEXT, PLEASE.
- CANDACE SCHMANDACE.
- HOW'S EVERYBODY DOING?
- NO, YOU HAVE
A WONDERFUL DAY.
[giggles]
- OOPS.
[chuckles]
SORRY.
THAN A GIRL:
WHO CAN'T WALK GOOD...
- OR A GUY WHO CAN'T SPEAK WELL.
- I'M SO EMBARRASSED.
[laughs]
GUESS I'M A LITTLE NERVOUS.
- YOU THINK?
NEXT.
- WELL, WASN'T THAT LOVELY?
WITH ME TONIGHT.
OF MY LIFE.
- IT'S MY TURN.
PRESSURE'S ON.
LOOK, HERE'S THE THING.
NOT AN ACTRESS.
- I'M SURE LOTS OF GUYS SAY IT,
BUT BRAINS REALLY ARE JUS AS IMPORTANT TO ME AS BEAUTY.
- HI.
I'M BELLA MICHAELS.
- ME LIKEY.
- OH, BOY.
THE OTHER ROLE.
- WHAT?
WHY?
THIS IS NO A BACHELORETTE PARTY.
OFF IT SOMEHOW.
- OFF WHAT?
- ME GUSTA.
- SERIOUSLY?
- YEAH.
THEY FRIGHTEN ME.
- [whispering]
I'LL PROTECT YOU.
- THAT'S AWFUL.
SO IS THAT.
- WOW.
I MEAN, WHOA.
- SERIOUSLY?
- YEAH.
- YOU CAN'T FALL FOR EVERY GIRL
THAT WALKS INTO THE ROOM TODAY.
- WHO'S FALLING?
I'M JUST COMMENTING.
- NO, I KNOW EXACTLY
WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
- I AM.
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"Casting Couch" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 1 Sep. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/casting_couch_5171>.
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