Class Rank Page #4
- Year:
- 2017
- 108 min
- 499 Views
they were killed by an avalanche.
Your parents were
killed by an avalanche?
Yes, unfortunately avalanche balloons
weren't commonplace in 2006.
Do you ski?
Um. No,
but my dad's been saying for years
that he's gonna take me to Tahoe.
There's plenty of great mountains
on the East Coast as well.
Yeah, but he lives in California.
Veronica, if you don't ski,
why are you organizing the ski trip?
Because it'll look good
on my transcript to Yale.
I organize activities all the
time that I have no interest in.
So Yale is your top choice?
Yeah.
They have by far the most renowned
history program in the country.
I didn't realize you
were such a history buff.
Actually, I find history
to be pretty boring.
It's just that history
is the best major to have
when applying to law school.
So you want to be a lawyer?
No. I want to be a
Supreme Court Justice.
That's a very impressive career goal.
I personally believe the Supreme Court
is the most influential
branch of our democracy.
Did you know that
every member on the
current Supreme Court bench
graduated from either
Harvard or Yale?
If I go to both,
I'll be on a great path
towards the Supreme Court.
I thought Justice Ginsburg
graduated from Columbia?
She did but she actually
started law school
at Harvard and then
transferred to Columbia.
She was the first woman ever to be on
the Columbia Law Review.
I have no doubt you'll be
successful in your venture.
However,
a word of advice for when you are
on the Supreme Court.
Never accept a Coke
from Clarence Thomas.
Haha... You're gross, Bernie.
Do you think Barf-nard
and Virgin-ica are
actually dating?
I just ate lunch.
Good afternoon Bernard.
I have a list of grievances
not unlike Martin Luther's 95 Theses.
This is very heavy.
I estimate it will take up
roughly 6 pages of newsprint.
I only have 10 pages of newsprint.
In your hand, you possess my official
declaration of
candidacy the Livingston
Board of Education.
Your running for the
Board of Education?
What does your grandfather
feel about your candidacy?
Well, local politics is not his forte.
He much prefers shuffleboard.
I'd like to try shuffleboard someday.
Salutations, Post Worker Wesley.
First class international mail please.
Here's my customs form.
Alright.
'B', we go through this every time,
man.
You should use a padded
envelope to protect your tape.
Out of principle I refuse to pay extra
money for air wrapped in
non recyclable plastic.
Okay, but I can hook you
up with some bubble wrap.
Something your special lady
will enjoy just popping.
Let me get you another one.
Yeah. There you go.
I'm really glad you're not
just emailing your lady.
There's something special about
receiving that letter in the mail.
It's like the first time
you see a baby deer born.
He shoots right out of his
mom and all that little stuff
falls out and gets messy everywhere.
Can't buy that feeling.
And email just doesn't cut it.
Agreed.
Also, I don't wish to share the
contents of our relationship
with the NSA.
Yeah,
you shouldn't cause they're watching.
They're watching right now.
Put the fluff down Bernard.
Start stretching.
Jehovahs.
Actually, I believe that
maybe, guest, I invited over.
We have a game bud.
Hello, Bernard.
I hope I'm not too early.
Please come in.
Thank you.
Grandpa, this is the Editor-In-Chief
of 'The Livingston Weekly'.
Editor-Ln-Chief,
this is my grandfather, Oswald.
Madam.
Very pleased to me you.
What's in the bag?
Ice cream.
You churn it yourself?
No, my friends Ben & Jerry.
What kind of ice cream?
Chocolate chip cookie dough.
That's my grandfather's
third favorite kind.
Fourth.
Pay him no heed. He thinks vanilla and
vanilla-bean should be
categorized separately.
- They should be.
- They should be.
Shall I put it in the freezer?
Yes please, right through here.
Thanks.
What's going on?
Every woman comes here,
wants to bring us, sweets.
It is the year of the monkey, Grandpa.
It appears my grandson brought
a hustler to our yard.
You must be on the
shuffleboard circuit.
I swear this is my first time.
So you're a natural?
In some ways.
I was gonna take it easy on you.
What a sap.
Hello.
- Your grandchild
- Does Bernard play?
Huh?
Does Bernard play?
I would say barely to that question.
He's usually too busy
with his extracurriculars.
I'm finished.
Wow. I had no idea that
you were an artist.
Hardly.
Painting is merely my preferred
mandatory school elective.
Which is yours?
I like orchestra. I play the violin.
Just like former Supreme
Court Justice Abe Fortas.
Yeah.
So,
what is our next campaign maneuver?
Kay, we need to get the posters around
town and get your name out there.
What are the five most highly
trafficked spots in Livingston?
I would venture to guess... the mall.
ShopRite,
drugstore,
post office,
and the hospital.
Maybe we skip the hospital.
I don't want people to
associate Bernie Flannigan
with emergency rooms.
That seems prudent.
Bernard. Jehovahs.
You know,
your yard could use some T-L-C.
Ma'am?
Tender loving care.
Hey, who's that?
That's Tai-Yu. My Aurora Borealis.
You have a girlfriend?
Yes, I am in a committed,
long distance,
loving, monogamous relationship.
Oh. How'd you guys meet?
We have been pen-pals
since the fourth grade.
It was a social studies assignment.
Yeah, in Mr. Dubrow's class?
Exactly.
Your pen-pal was from Finland.
I believe her name was Evilina.
- Avalina.
- Avalina.
You were in that class?
I sat directly behind you.
Your side ponytail was
a constant hindrance
You remember my side ponytail?
Cool.
Hey honey.
Did you two have fun?
Yeah, I think so.
It was kinda hard to tell with Bernie.
Mom, what do you think about
long distance relationships?
Let me put it like this.
Everyone I know who's moved
from New York to L.A.
for their career, has wound up ending
it with their significant other.
So they usually never ever work out?
Didn't for me and your dad.
Whoa, I like this portrait.
It's like Singer Sargent
meets Edward Hopper.
You're familiar with the 20th century
American realism movement?
Yeah, I studied it in college.
C'mon sweetie.
That's my mom. I've got to go.
I have a violin lesson.
Bye you guys.
Bye.
How was your day?
Dude, your girlfriend is pretty chill.
She's actually my campaign manager.
My girlfriend lives in China.
China? Out of site, out of mind, bro.
Condoms on aisle six,
if you know what I mean.
Bernie, bro, you were so right
about the 'Dynastar' bindings.
I hope you heal quickly.
Thanks, man. I'm definitely
taking your advice next year.
How much are the candy-grams?
One is two dollars. Two are three
dollars. Three are four dollars.
The more you buy, the more you save.
I'll take two.
There you go.
Thank you.
By the way, Bernie,
I told my parents to
vote for you bro.
Thank you.
You got it.
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"Class Rank" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/class_rank_5639>.
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