Diner Page #4

So what I did was,

I opened my fly to loosen everything up.

Just to give it a little air.

And it worked.

Everything settled down and then I got

caught back up in the picture.

And then, when Sandra got her leg caught

on the bush...

...and she lifted up her dress.

It just popped right up.

And it went through the bottom

of the popcorn box.

And the force of it just opened up the flap.

It just pushed the flap open?

It's Ripley's.

It just pushed the flap right open.

And I couldn't move the box.

You would have seen it.

That's true.

Let's go back inside.

- Okay?

- Okay.

Come on.

All right.

We'll just get a seat in the back here.

Do you care if I kiss you right here

in front of God and everybody?

I can't wait either.

What's that guy's name? The actor?

Troy Donahue.

Troy. What kind of name is Troy?

He's gorgeous.

You ever hear of a guy

with the name of Troy?

Yeah. Troy Swartzman from Towanda.

This movie was written by the author

of The Man in the Grey Flannel Suit.

I wonder where that Barbara girl

and Billy are?

I'd really like to see this again.

You can take Elyse.

Hi.

Fellas, don't forget to bring

some tens tonight.

Ten whats?

I don't know.

Death. I'd give up your life

if I could have her.

We're even.

Take it easy.

Is he okay?

Damn. That's Willard Broxton.

Long time comin', huh, Bill?

I couldn't believe it. There he was.

I didn't want to hit him, but I had to.

Definitely. You had to.

I mean, Willard Broxton.

Who's Willard Broxton?

You should have said something.

- What am I gonna say?

- I got Willard!

- Shrevie, who is Willard Broxton?

- I always liked Willard Broxton.

- You liked him?

- I used to take his milk money.

That was outstanding.

I'll see you guys later.

- Are we going to go eat?

- I'm not in the mood.

Going to the diner?

Later. I'm going to the TV station

to see Barbara.

Shrevie, who is Willard Broxton?

It was the 11th grade.

No, it was the 10th grade. That's right.

Billy was playin' ball against

one of the high school fraternities.

I think they were ULP.

So Billy comes sliding into second base

to break up the double play...

...and the second baseman thought

that Billy was trying to hurt him.

So he jumped on Billy.

So Billy punched the guy.

And then, the whole ULP team

jumped on Billy.

They beat the crap out of him.

He's been waiting for them

after all these years?

- He swore he'd get them.

- That was forever ago, Shrevie.

So, Broxton makes it eight. Or seven.

Seven? No, no. It's eight. That's right.

There's one guy left.

What are you waitin' for? It's open.

What about the slides?

I didn't hear anything about the slides.

- There's not much time before the news.

- Yeah, I tried to call.

The switchboard closes down at 10:00.

I was just getting the feeling

that you were avoiding me.

That's not true, Billy.

Do you want to run down

the film chains for me?

The governor's press conference on 3.

There's a B roll of it.

And the slides? One.

Stand by for cold tease.

Ten seconds.

- Who's the visitor?

- Friend of mine. Five seconds.

And, one. Mike, cue!

President Eisenhower returns

from the World Peace Tour.

Steel dispute continues. Interviews

with John Unitas and coach Ewbank...

...in preparation for tomorrow's

championship game.

These and other stories next.

Roll three, three and track.

Willy, after this I still have

a lot of work to do.

Why don't you call in the morning?

- Where's the news opening?

- Six.

Okay. What's good?

Church services are at 10:00, 8:30, 9:00.

Punch I.D., and announce.

This is WBAL TV, Channel 11

in Baltimore, wishing all our viewers...

...a Merry Christmas

and a Happy New Year.

Let's see. It's two more days till the test.

And if she passes, it's two more days

till the thing. The marriage.

Where are you guys going, Puerto Rico?

No, Cuba.

Cuba, that's nice. My parent's friends,

the Copelands, they go there every year.

- They said it's nice?

- Really nice.

Yeah, I heard.

Shrev, are you happy

with your marriage or what?

I don't know.

What do you mean, you don't know?

- You don't know?

- What?

How could you not... You don't know?

How could you not know?

I don't know.

Beth is terrific and everything,

but Jesus, I don't know.

A big part of the problem

when you get married...

When you're dating...

...everything is talkin' about sex, right?

Where can we do it? Why can't we do it?

Are your parents going to be out

so we can do it?

Trying to get a weekend

just so that we can do it.

So you can do it.

Everything is just always talkin'

about getting sex.

And then planning the wedding.

All the details.

Details, sh*t.

But then, when you get married...

It's crazy, I don't know.

You can get it whenever you want it.

You wake up in the morning,

and she's there.

And you come home from work,

and she's there.

And so all that sex-planning talk

is over with.

And so is the wedding-planning talk

'cause you're already married.

So, you know, I can come down here

and we can bullshit the whole night away.

But I cannot hold

a five-minute conversation with Beth.

It's not her fault. I'm not blaming her.

- She's great. It's...

- No, of course not.

It's just, we've got nothing to talk about.

But, it's good, it's good.

It's good?

- It's nice, right?

- Yes.

- It's nice.

- Right.

Well, you've always got the diner.

Yeah. We've always got the diner.

Don't worry about it.

I'm not worried.

Don't back out on me.

I'm not going to back out on you, either.

Unless, of course, she fails the test.

It's out of my hands.

Hey, Boog. Did you hear? They won by 14.

God! They weren't supposed to roll up

that high of a score!

You gonna listen to me next time?

Come here. Your mother

let you loose like this?

Look at those pants.

I got charcoal pants here.

You want to get inside the diner?

Come here. Look at these. Charcoal gray.

Special sale, $12.50.

- $12.50? You offered him $7.

- For you, $11.98. These are better.

You think I'll tell him?

Don't tell anyone where you got these.

- How much money have you got?

- $4.

$4? I've got a good shirt for you.

Forget the pants.

- It's incredible.

- Unbelievable.

Where's he now?

He's already up to the Pimlico. Right?

Then he's got the Junction.

And the Avalon and the Garrison.

That's the George's Deluxe in the corner.

Oh, yeah.

You know what that is?

One, two. The whole left side of the menu.

What a triumph if he pulls it off.

You're talking about 15, 16 more

if you include the...

...the Maryland fried-chicken dinner.

No. I think he's just talking

club sandwiches.

Excuse me, Earl. Does that include

the fried-chicken dinner?

- Yes.

- It does.

Twenty-two deluxe sandwiches

and the fried-chicken dinner!

It's not human. He's not a person.

He's like a building with feet.

You know what I mean? It's unbelievable.

I won't pay you.

It's not fair.

She was supposed to grab your pecker,

not reach into the popcorn and get it.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes