Do Not Disturb Page #4

It looked interesting enough.

Got home and watched the film.

Almost died of boredom. Awful.

The next day went back

to return the film.

He looked at me.

Don't know why,

said it was fabulous.

There was something about him.

Then discover it's part one

of a ten-part series!

So the guy gives me part two,

and go home and watch it.

It's even worse.

So decide to tell him the truth.

Go back to the video shop.

take one look at him

and say liked it even better.

And so on.

Every day, rented

another part of his collection.

And every day, said loved it.

When was finished, felt sad.

Maybe was afraid we'd have

nothing else to talk about.

Couldn't get him off my mind.

His nut-hugger jean shorts,

his hairy white legs,

his protruding eyes...

even imagined myself kissing him

And you know what?

It didn't feel all that strange.

Started imagining his balls

wondered if they were hairy.

Was so flipped out

never set foot back in the shop.

I'm telling you,

it was a weird feeling.

Sometimes think should've tried.

Should've tried it with a dude.

It pisses me off

that I'm not more open.

Between the way see myself and

what am, there's a f***ing abyss.

Didn't do anything with him.

- Know.

- Just want to make it clear.

Was talking about myself.

Know you're not gay.

Know you know.

Wish were more of a fag.

It'd make tomorrow easier.

Tomorrow!

Do you think sleeping with someone

breaks something?

Mean,

how many ex-lovers

are you still friends with?

It's far worse...

never stay more than five minutes

after ejaculating.

You don't plan on coming in me?

So you agree I'm f***ing you?

We said we'd draw lots.

Bring the condoms.

In the plural?

Don't know why told you

that story. It's so weird.

'Cause even if think

know what am,

still felt something for that guy.

Don't think

lever felt anything like that.

Me either, personally.

But do like George Michael.

Does that mean anything?

Hey guys, what about Dalida?

More words, always words

The same words

Nothing but words...

You OK?

It was along night.

Don't know why I'm doing this,

but feel committed.

The only explanation have

is that my personality

has several facets.

Multiple aspects.

When we met, one of these facets

fell head over heels for you.

It was exciting.

Wanted to spend my life with you,

buy a house, have kids.

But then...

this facet

grew bigger

It grew until it took over.

It turned into a monster

that devoured all other aspects

of my personality.

Overall, I'm happy-

But must not be that happy

because want to do this thing.

Then you have to do it.

Are you serious?

Yes.

You talk about the different facets

of your personality.

Do you think I'm just an image stuck

in the kitchen. Your little wife?

No.

My world isn't confined to you.

You're not enough for me either.

Of course...

mean, can imagine.

What do you mean?

You remember when

went to Benedicte's party,

the one with her friends?

About a year ago?

Drank too much.

And let myself go with some guy

in the bathroom.

We hadn't even spoken much

to each other. It was something...

It was animal like.

He instantly turned me on.

The more he touched me,

the more wanted.

It's like he opened a door.

A door to a part of myself...

that didn't know.

And came a different way.

It was powerful.

It did me good. It was fantastic.

Afterward s,

knew what was coming home to.

Knew what I wanted.

Everything was clear to me.

It's as if

As if was.

yours.

was with you, was your wife

And yet,

could turn on the whole world.

It made me...

It blew my mind.

It's as if you came with me too

It felt good.

It was soothing.

And it was simple.

It only happened once.

Never told you because...

maybe my vision of you

was too rigid.

Now see what you mean

about me not being enough.

Listen...

don't ask me to try to understand

what you're doing, because can't.

It was only once?

Shut up and listen to me.

It's not the same.

You have to do this.

We can't live together

if we keep things locked inside.

They have to come out.

Or go in.

Do what you want.

But you need to know

if this is essential for you.

You need to know now,

before we have a child.

Good evening.

- Who is it?

- It's me.

- Me who?

- Come on, open up.

Hey pal, come in.

Got us the wedding suite.

It's very beige.

Every modern comfort.

Here's the gear.

Listen...

know it's not exactly

what we had in mind but...

it'll give it a certain mood.

A grassroots feel, an artsy touch.

It's a film about two pals.

So think it'll do the job.

It has a few special effects

and we can retouch it.

OK, cool.

The thing that makes

this whole story

original and interesting is that

it's about two straight friends

getting off together.

But how will people know

we're really straight

if we don't tell them?

You mean like an introduction?

Bingo.

To be honest, think it shows

on my mug that I'm straight.

No?

That's good.

Can you just...

That's perfect.

Cool.

OK then

It's rolling.

Hi, I'm Ben.

I'm Jean-Francois.

Everyone calls me Jeff.

- We're making...

- A film.

A film.

No. Cut.

Seattle. Gotta do it in English.

You think so?

With the hat and in English.

This is stupid.

We're French, we do it in French.

We'll subtitle the beginning.

Especially since the other part

will be more visual.

- ??? Ben.

- ??? Jeff

- Go on.

- No, you start

So, we're making a film.

But first,

we wanted to introduce ourselves.

We 're old friends,

we've known ear:
it other for ages.

We were at art school together

and when we finished,

we said we'd do something together.

But we took very different paths.

Jeff has become a sort

of adventurer who travels the world.

I'm married, have a wife, a house.

All that jazz.

He turned up two days ago.

And here we are.

- And so

- And so

we heard about your festival

at a party.

And we thought

it would be kind of original to see

two straight guys in action

in front of the camera.

We were totally trashed

when we got the idea,

but then it turned in to

a hetero macho trip.

I'm the dude, I'll nail you.

- No, I'll nail you.

- I'll nail you.

But we managed to get past' that

and here we are.

We can '1' say we 're exactly relaxed.

We 're actually pretty scared.

But we said to ourselves:

Isn't an artist's real role

to push limits to the extreme?

You bet.

So here we are

and guess you're going to see...

What you're going to see.

I think it's in the can.

I'm good if you are.

- We can always change it later.

- Yeah.

But it's good for now. It's good.

I've got this funny feeling

in my gut.

You bet.

Let's stop yacking

and just get to it.

You know what?

I'll put the camera right here,

next to the bed.

I'll count to five and we kiss.

This is it.

What about our tongues?

Maybe it would be more...

More what?

Don't know, more...

Whose tongue, yours or mine?

How about both?

We've got to stop thinking

or we'll go nuts.

We can draw lots?

We're not going to draw lots

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