Dude Page #8

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and walking away from you

the other day in the library.

Loans categorically suck

and I'm still paying mine off.

So, you know, If you ever wanna talk,

I can imagine it's not the kind of thing

that gets,

gets a lot of attention around here.

Yeah, it's not really a big topic of

conversation amongst my friends. You know.

But, uhm, it's very cool

that you are dealing with it now.

- Got to do it, so...

- Yeah.

How's, uh, how's your date?

Uhm, it was just supposed

to be us girls, but things are changing.

Everyone's leaving, it's weird, you know.

Well, what endures

when all else has changed?

- It is love.

- It is love. Kierkegaard.

- Hm-mmm.

- I love that guy.

- Yeah.

- You know, poet.

Well, look, just tell them

your love hasn't changed.

You'll only get so many chances.

- You sad about leaving?

- Not really.

I'm just glad I have another year here.

I can't imagine leaving this place.

What are we doing?

You're leaving in a couple of months.

I, I don't know what Chloe's gonna do.

Hey, Lil, this isn't some fling.

I love you.

Hey.

Hey.

You came back.

Mr. Bemis:
What's a fart that sounds

and smells like nothing? A Sartre

I hate boys.

I know. We're ready for men.

No. You know what I need right now?

I need my dudes, where the f*** is Lily?

I don't know. I wish Clo was here, too.

I miss our token white friends.

I know, it's ironic.

This just...

- Wasn't we had planned?

- Wasn't us.

God, that fuckhead Mike's in there.

They have f***ed me up, just f***ed up.

Lil, whatever happened

with that guy, I just...

I'm really sorry.

I'm sorry.

I think I'm so f***ing well-adjusted.

I'm not, I'm just this,

like, Stepford wife control freak.

I'm crazy.

And I'm so sorry

for being so intense about Thomas.

I just wanted to be sad together.

I get it, sometimes you don't wanna talk,

and he's not my brother,

and just because I was in love with him,

it doesn't mean...

He was in love with you, too, Lil.

I know.

He wrote me a letter about it.

Look, Lil...

It's gonna hurt forever.

It's part of who we are now.

Mourning what was

and what is,

is sad enough, Lil.

I just, I can't take on mourning

something that could have been.

And, you know, whatever it is,

whatever is gonna happen,

we're still gonna be us.

You're my life partner.

I'm sorry about your prom.

No, you are my prom.

Ready?

Oh! Look who decided to show.

- Come on, I couldn't miss prom.

- Hm-mmm.

Guys, I'm really sorry

for being such a psycho.

- It's okay.

- Yeah, it's okay.

You're like

the obsessive boyfriend I never had.

What is never changed

when everything's changed?

It is love.

Oh. I love you.

Now, I don't know what's gonna happen,

but I've got you guys,

- and that is pretty f***ing good.

- Yeah, girl.

- Let's blow this joint.

- Yeah.

- Yes.

- Prom sucks.

- Yeah.

- Let's go.

Yes.

Have you seen the video

that she's talking about?

- No.

- It, it's the best.

- ...your f***ing phone. A**hole.

- Why were you looking at my phone?

You can't look in my phone.

Hey, remember me?

Hey, how's it go...

- Oh!

- Sh*t!

- Go f*** yourself.

- F***, yeah!

That was awesome.

- Yeah. You can't f***ing look...

- F*** you.

- Hey.

- Sh*t, sorry you had to see that.

Everything okay?

Uhm, she's mad that I have a phone...

I guess.

I don't know. She's f***ing crazy, man.

I shouldn't have brought her, that was...

a bad idea.

I have been such a dick to you

and I, I'm really sorry.

I didn't mean to be. And I'm really sorry.

Noah, I've been kind of dick-like, too.

- Dickishness forgiven?

- Yeah.

Great. Come on. Let's go.

- Yay!

- Yo, now the party's here.

Last ones to leave,

classy girls.

Savoring every moment.

All right, ladies.

Let's get the f*** out of here.

Oh, wait, wait, let me get a picture of you. - Oh, seriously?

- Yes.

- Yeah.

- So let's take pictures,

- Jesus Christ.

- Yeah, okay.

Oh, that's good. All right.

Freeze it, hold it.

She smashed brother's Donkey Bong?

Donkey Bong,

there with us through high school,

life, death, SATs, prom,

we only had a little bit of weed, but we

wanted to get, like, really, really high.

We bury you next to your brethren,

Jon Bong Jovi, Sean Bongery,

Bong Connery, "Ceci n'est pas une pipe."

You will be missed.

Oh.

Now, what do we do?

Hmm, I have to finish my grad speech,

but I almost don't give a f***.

What do you have so far?

Mmm, I'm writing that on my phone.

- Well, stand up. Do it for us.

- Yeah.

- Hmm?

- Lily, Lily.

Okay. I've tried to put a name

on what I'm feeling.

It has to do with fear,

of the unknown, of change.

It's wrapped up in memory,

being in the places

that have contained your life.

It has the sense of too-soon nostalgia,

as if I deeply long

for what's right in front of me.

Then a friend said it, loss.

Is that what I'm feeling,

what it means to grow up?

Your growing familiarity

with an acceptance

of the pain of life's losses?

Growing up is understanding

what eases that pain, friendship.

A bond fused by tears, traumas,

hours logged in the same cars,

in front of the same TVs.

All of our memories

are wrapped up in each other.

It's the greatest gift

this place has given us,

and it's part of our loss today.

But the poet, Robert Penn Warren

gave a better definition of loss,

what loss can be if we approach it right.

"The process whereby

the pain of the past in its pastness

may be converted

into the future tense of joy."

Mr. Bemis.

- Hi.

- Hey.

- Okay, uh, call me Immanuel.

- Immanuel? Really?

- Hm-mmm.

- Uhm, thank you for the flowers.

I'm glad you came.

God, what am I gonna do without you?

- You're the reason I come to school.

- Me, too. For you.

Look, I know it's wrong.

I'm 18, though.

Look, I just graduated, so...

I'm, I'm 24, but I have

the emotional maturity of like a 20 or...

- Right. Right. Right.

- maximum.

- Come, come meet my mom.

- Wow, uh...

I'm nervous. All right.

In the middle? Immanuel Bemis.

- Wait, wait, wait.

- I'm gonna get all of us.

- Amelia.

- Rosa.

Your brownies are so delicious,

everybody loves them.

Where did you, where did you get this?

Damn, I love to chill, dude.

- Hi.

- Congratulations.

You killed your speech.

I was crying the whole time.

- Thank you.

- Thanks. Yeah. It was great.

- Are we still on for dinner tomorrow?

- Yeah, motherf***er.

My mom is currently basting

the brisket as we speak, so, yeah.

- Amazing.

- Great.

Lily, I wanna get a family photo.

Okay. Go photo. I'm gonna stay here

and to really eat

- every single one of these brownies. - Okay. - Hey, guys.

- Go. Okay, wait, here she comes.

- All right. Go. Go. Go. Get in there.

- You just literally ruin it.

- Do something.

- Whoa.

- I'm sorry.

- Do something, uhm, adorable.

The monkeys. The monkeys.

- Aw. Do it.

- The monkeys.

Oh, there it is. There it is.

Good one. And we'll do that thing

where you guys hit a hundred times.

- And enough now. Come with me.

- Perfect.

- How are you doing?

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