Duplex Page #3

Synopsis: Alex Rose and Nancy Kendricks are a young couple who believe they have found their perfect home to start a family in. There is just one problem. An elderly tenant is staying upstairs and won't move out. Alex and Nancy desperately try everything to convince her to leave, but she refuses to move. Soon, their dream home becomes their home of nightmares.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Danny DeVito
Production: Miramax Films
  2 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.9
Metacritic:
50
Rotten Tomatoes:
35%
PG-13
Year:
2003
89 min
Website
398 Views


upstairs neighbor"?

Signed "Alex Rose."

Here you go.

And I hope you like it.

Oh, I know I will.

Okay. All right.

Good day.

Alex?

Yeah?

I know we've just had

this discussion,

but I was wondering

if the firm of Rose & Rose

could accompany an old lady

to the pharmacy.

It's pissing down out there.

And I need to renew

my monthlies.

It won't take any time at all.

30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36...

How much is the Nicorette?

$43.97.

I lost me place.

One, two, three...

8, 9, 10...

1, 2, 3...

22, 23, 24...

25, 26, 27, 28, 29, and 30.

Okay, good?

Oh, blueberries.

1, 2, 3...

I thought you

were gonna talk to her.

I did, honey.

I did.

I was very clear with her.

She's just...

She manipulated me somehow.

She manipulated you?

She's very crafty.

She's a crafty old lady.

Well, I'll tell you what.

Tomorrow's gonna be better,

because you know why?

It's gonna be Saturday,

and that's our day off,

and we're gonna get to sleep in.

- Okay?

- Yeah.

I promise everything

will be better tomorrow, okay?

The Love Boat

Soon we'll be making

another run

The Love Boat

Good morning.

Good morning, Nancy.

This is Nancy Kendricks.

Hello, dear.

Are those musical instruments?

Yes!

We are a brass ensemble.

We've got a concert

at St. Augustus on Friday.

Let's go out shopping.

I'll deliver it this afternoon?

Yes, that's great.

Hey, honey, look.

Oh!

Oh, what'd you get?

Remington Royal.

50 bucks.

How much were

they asking for it?

50 bucks.

Look, I got a peacock.

Oh.

- Isn't it great?

- Cool.

What does it do?

It's there to be decorative

and pretty

and aesthetically pleasing.

So what do we need a daybed for?

Oh, for all your napping.

Honey, I took one nap

for two minutes.

I didn't even shut my eyes.

Hey, what's in the bag?

Answer to our prayers.

Try it next to that one,

'cause then the couch will go...

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.

Wow.

You know what I just realized

that we forgot to do?

We forgot to christen

the apartment.

That's what I was thinking.

Agua de beber

Agua de beber camar

Agua de beber

I love our home.

Aah!

- What was she doing?

- Oh, my God.

I don't know. You think

she saw the whole thing?

Ew!

Hey, where are you going?

Oh, now's my chance.

I got to get up there.

Wait.

What are you gonna do?

The answer to our problems.

- Clap Me.

- What does it do?

When she falls asleep,

we can control her TV.

You be the lookout.

If you hear her coming,

knock on the pipe, okay?

Like, make a noise.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

Shut up.

Shut up.

Hello.

Well, hello, Little Dickey.

I'm back again, aren't I?

Guess what I've got in the bag.

I got hot dogs.

Hot dogs for Dickey boy.

I'll tell you

what I'm going to do.

I'm going to give it

a wee chew meself first.

Mm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm. It's so nice, Dickey.

It is.

It's so good.

Mm.

I tell you what.

Shall we have a bit of music?

A bit of music

and a bit of a dance.

I'll put on your favorite,

the tune you like the most.

The one that was

Big Dick's favorite, too.

There's a-boy.

From your kindred and all

From the campfire at night

We'll hear

the wild dingoes call

But there's nothing

so Ionesome

so dull, or so drear

Than to stand in the bar

of a pub with no beer

Now the publican's anxious

Holy crap!

Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha

Mrs. Connelly?

With a thrill in my hand

and a pill on my tongue

Dissolve the nerves

that have just begun

Listening to Marvin

All night long

This is the sound

Mrs. Connelly?

Mrs. Connelly?

Nancy?

Is that you?

Mrs. Connelly?

Hold on a sec.

Mrs. Connelly?

Oh, Nancy.

What a nice surprise.

I'll make you some tea.

It's nice to see you here.

We'll have some tea.

Oh!

And biscuits.

Ow! Ooh!

Honey?

Oh!

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Are you okay?

What happened to you? You were

supposed to be the lookout.

I know.

I know.

All right, here we go.

- Ready?

- Yeah.

You're a genius!

That is so weird.

How would she know that? How

would she know how to use it?

You didn't leave the box

up there or anything, did you?

Nancy Kendricks.

Nancy, Mrs. Connelly.

I have a favor to ask.

Emergency!

Hurry!

Run!

Mrs. Connelly,

you know, honestly,

we're going to print today,

and everything's

just crazy around here.

Can't you ask Alex?

I knocked and knocked.

He must be in

a deep, deep sleep today.

We didn't get it

until this morning.

Nancy! Nancy!

We have 27 minutes

to get this to press.

Get off the phone!

Okay, thank you, Mrs. Connelly.

Where is my new hot list?

Where is it?

I'm almost done.

- 5 seconds!

- Okay. Okay. Okay.

- Okay. Okay.

- Hurry!

This is it?

Yes.

- Did you check it?

- Yes.

I don't want it tickety-boo.

I want it tickety-now!

It's good. It's cute.

I like it.

Is it, like,

800, 900 square feet?

No, it's, like, 1,800.

But it might seem cozy

'cause of the fireplaces.

There are 3 fireplaces.

So, here it is.

The third fireplace.

Wow.

This apartment is amazing.

I'm so glad that you like it.

Whew. Relief.

Wonderful collection.

- Mmm, thank you.

- Yeah.

Just make sure you save space

for the Alex Rose

first editions.

Ah, yes.

So.

So, yeah.

How's the ending turning out?

The ending is gonna be great.

I'm kind of circling it

'cause I don't want to force it.

Just make sure you

turn it in by Wednesday.

Management's being very strict

with all our mid-level authors.

I'm only mid-level?

Right now.

Of course, you won't be after

you hand in your masterpiece.

We're replacing most

of the furniture we have,

but we're going

for a Miller/Eames look.

You love Eames, Terrence.

I just got a new piece.

Did you bring that guy with

the girl in the leopard thing?

Oh, that's Chick.

That's the guy who's advising me

on the Don Piper mysteries.

What, is he a detective

or something?

No.

He's a hired gun.

He kills people for a living.

You brought a hit man

into the party?

Relax.

He's very discreet.

He's got a perfectly legitimate

day job as a cover.

And what do you do, Chick?

I'm a pornographer.

Here, let me give you a card,

you know, just in case.

She's this funny old Irish lady

named Mrs. Connelly,

and she's actually in a brass

ensemble at the church tonight.

There's all sorts

of incredible details.

I mean, I can't wait

for you guys to see it.

It's beautiful.

Ooh, Herman, get in here.

Herman?

Being a landlord

doesn't give you the right

to enter your tenant's premises

anytime you feel like it.

I just wanted my friends

to have a look- see.

You were supposed to be

at the church performing.

Heavens no.

It's next Friday.

We've got a big week

of practice ahead of us.

You terrified the poor woman.

Mrs. Connelly, you can press

charges if you want.

No, I don't want to do that.

They're such a nice couple.

Good night, now.

Good night, Mrs. Connelly.

I'm gonna be watching

the two of you very closely.

- Hey, Alex, right?

- Hey, Chick.

How you doing?

Brought you a housewarming gift.

Oh, that's so sweet.

Well, look,

this is very tasteful stuff.

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Larry Doyle

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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