Eagle vs Shark Page #3

I'll be back.

See you later.

Cock hole.

See ya. Love ya.

Done.

I like your family.

Doug and Nancy are very nice.

They're idiots.

Except for my Dad and me.

- I like them.

- Yeah, well...

they're still idiots.

This is Mason Hutchinson.

He's the best computer hacker

I know.

Gidday, Mason.

This is Lily McKinnon.

She's the best female

Fight Man player I've ever seen.

Hi.

Down to business, Mason.

Any developments?

When's the bastard getting back?

Not today, but the next day.

Tomorrow?

Yeah.

Good work.

How did you find out this information?

I asked his mum.

She lives in his house.

Good.

I'm glad he'll have someone

to wipe his arse...

when I turn him into a vegetable.

You've got pornography

on your computer screen.

Oh, Baby.

Oh, Baby.

Oh, Baby.

Oh, Baby.

It's got a virus.

Lilies.

Go. Move.

Hi, Dad.

Hey, Zane.

You still playing guitar?

Yep, yep.

Me and Zane are in a band.

Wow.

He does the music and I dance.

Cool.

Lily plays guitar too. She's really

good. She's good at finger picking.

- Really?

- No, not really.

Just, sort of, teaching myself.

- And she's got a degree.

- No, I don't.

Hey so,

what do you your parents do?

- They're dead unfortunately.

- They're dead.

Good one, Nancy.

They had heart attacks.

Sorry, Lily.

It doesn't matter.

She's an orphan.

Like Oliver Twist.

Well, I suppose

I should say a few words.

Why?

Now we're all here I'd just like to say

that I'm really happy...

that we're all together under the same

roof. It's always great to come home.

And I'd also like to say

that this Saturday...

I'll be having a scheduled fight

with Eric Elisi.

- He's Samoan.

- Oh, yeah. He used to beat you up.

- Yeah, and me.

- Yeah, and him.

He was the toughest guy

at our school.

He used to pick on quite a few people,

actually.

Anyway...

you're all invited to attend.

It'd be great to see you there.

Thank you.

Why are you fighting him, uncle?

Well, Zane... Basically, I'm gonna

restore honor to the family name...

to your family name.

My family name is Davis.

Eh, Dad?

Yep.

Dangerous Davis back in the day.

- Yeah, I'm a Davis too.

- Yeah, well it doesn't matter, does it?

We're family.

That's what matters.

Why didn't you tell me

you had a little girl?

I don't know.

- How often do you see her?

- Not very.

- How old is she?

- Nine.

- Were you married?

- No.

What is this Crimewatch?

We met at a party, we had sex,

then a baby came out.

End of story. Finito.

How many boyfriends have you had?

Three.

Who?

Sam, Sam, another Sam,

and Raymond.

How many girlfriends

have you had?

About five.

Actually, eight.

I forgot some.

Who?

That's irrelevant.

- Lily.

- Yep.

You can hold my hand if you want.

Okay.

Good morning.

- Morning.

- Hi.

Hey.

Look at all this stuff.

How much do you reckon you'd pay...

for all this make-up?

A bag, like this?

Dunno. Maybe a hundred bucks?

No.

All this is only thirty dollars.

And,

it's dermatologically sweet as.

- Yep. But you can have it for twenty.

- Cool.

Five.

- Twenty-five dollars...

- Twenty-five.

Because you're a guest.

Combination.

Kick, punch, block,

spin, double kick.

Kick, spin...

kick, punch...

double kick.

Okay, ball.

Block.

Stick, block.

Block.

Hoop.

Through, yes!

Hi.

- Hey, Trace.

- Hi, Tracy.

Hey, Trace-meister.

Hey, let's take a break.

Good work everyone.

Who's that?

That's Tracy.

Their dead brother's fiance,e.

- Hey, this is Lily.

- Gidday.

Hi.

She's good at sports.

Netball, darts...

- Here, Jonah, here's that tape.

- Oh, thank you, Trace.

Hey, Trace-meister.

I heard you made team captain.

Yeah, Naomi got run over

in the weekend. So, they...

- yeah...

- Oh, that's wonderful news.

- I'm so proud of you, Trace.

- Oh, thanks.

Hey, Lily.

Show them your hula hooping.

Oh, no.

I'm not really that good.

Yes, you are.

She is good.

Show them. Go on.

They want to see it.

Why'd you drop it?

Sorry.

Dad, what do you think

of my new girlfriend?

She's an artist and a musician.

Amongst other things.

She's pretty cool, eh?

I don't know.

Yeah.

- Hey, what's good to buy for girls?

- Socks.

- I don't know.

- Vitamins.

Flowers, eh?

- Chicks like flowers.

- Yes.

What kind?

I don't mind.

Doesn't matter.

Chicks, they just like flowers.

Chilly.

I have to dump you.

Okay.

My life's just too complicated.

I guess, what I'm saying is...

I gotta be alone right now.

Oh, yeah.

And I'm busy

with the revenge mission.

I'm sorry.

- I didn't know this would happen.

- Oh, it doesn't matter.

And we can still be friends,

right?

Yep.

Damn it.

I'm too complex.

Hello.

This is Bond, James Bond.

I'm away on a mission

for Her Majesty's Secret Service.

Please, leave a message.

Shaken not stirred.

Hi, Damon. It's Lily.

I might have to come back

a little bit early.

So do you mind giving me a call,

please, on 8153373?

Thanks, bye.

Hello.

This is Bond, James Bond.

I'm away on a mission

for Her Majesty's...

Hey, b*tch.

Hello. Who's this?

Oh, sorry.

Hi, is Eric there please?

No, he's not back

till later tonight.

We go to the airport.

We've got a mini-van. You wanna come?

No, thanks. It's okay.

Okay.

You wanna leave a message for him?

Yes.

Could you tell him that

justice is waiting for him?

Is waiting for you. Okay, Justin.

Thank you. Bye-bye.

No, justice.

Justice.

- Hey, Tracy.

- Hi.

Can I come in?

Yeah.

There's no buses today.

They only go on Sunday's.

That's like

three whole days away.

I heard you broke up with Jarrod.

No. He broke up with me.

Did he?

Would...

do you wanna go out with me?

No, thanks.

Yeah well, I wasn't even serious.

I was...

I was joking and you fell for it, so...

I was joking...

I was joking.

Just joking.

You fell for it.

Hello.

This is Bond, James Bond.

I'm away on a mission

for Her Majesty's Secret Service.

F*** it.

Hi.

- I don't want to go up there.

- What?

I don't want to go up there.

Take me home, please.

Take me home, please.

I don't want to go up there.

That's where my Uncle Gordon died.

I thought he died in a fire.

Na.

I need to go to the toilet.

Come on then.

Come on.

There's my Dad.

Ouch.

Have you checked out

our local social scene yet?

Yeah, oh, not really.

Well, we're going to a party tomorrow

night. You can come if you want.

- Thanks, but I'm trying to go home.

- You sure?

Yeah.

Does anybody want to hear a joke?

Yeah.

What's the name

of the Emperor of Farts?

What?

Gaseous Maximus.

What's so funny?

- Oh, Lily just told a funny joke.

- Yeah. Where have you been?

Just hanging out with Tracy.

We've been pretty much laughing

the whole day.

Like this,

but about ten times more laughing.

Wow. That's heaps.

Excuse me.

Thank you for that very lovely dinner.

Excuse me. Thank you.

Gordon. Gordon. Gordon. Gordon.

Get out of it.

Dad, me and Tracy are going out.

I don't know how it happened,

but...

It's pretty serious.

Just thought you should know

the good news.

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