Elektra Luxx Page #4

- What did I say?

- "What does 10 bucks get me?"

- That's it?

Yeah, what were

you dreaming?

I don't know.

Really?

Yeah, I think...

I think I was back at school

in the cafeteria

and I wanted to know

what 10 bucks got me.

So, what did you get?

- Frozen yogurt.

- No sh*t. You were humping the pillow.

And a pony.

Frozen yogurt and a pony.

Well, listen up, pony girl. I just met

two venture capitalists in the lobby.

- Oh, yeah?

- Mm-hm. Loaded.

- Margaritas?

- No, like, rich.

They saw us at the beach this

morning and they are totally smitten.

They were mosquitoes.

I got bit right on my ass.

"Smitten."

You need to have your ears

looked at.

I love my ears.

By a doctor.

Doctors are like mimes,

but they talk.

BAMBI:

They wanna take us to dinner.

How can you be hungry

after that guacamole?

BAMBI:

You don't have to eat it all.

The point is, they gave me 200

bucks to go to the bathroom.

- Gross.

- Not to watch me go to the bathroom.

Just like a tip to powder my nose

prove a little interest

in our company.

- What company?

- Our company.

- We don't have a company.

- Female company.

Okay, no need to get upset.

Well, get dressed so that

we can make some easy money.

Aren't we supposed to be

on vacation?

Yes, this way, we get all expenses paid.

- Okay, but isn't that, like, working?

- Technically.

And again, who's been whining all

month about being fired from her job?

- I don't know.

- That was a rhetorical question.

- Are you saying I got fired?

- You told me you got fired.

I told you I got escorted

from the premises.

- I quit before they kicked me out.

- Whatever.

The producers said that I was never

gonna work in that town again.

It's a cheesy line.

He means he's gonna make sure you

never get another job in the business.

He didn't say "business,"

he said "town."

There are a million other towns

besides Chatsworth.

Be that as it may,

one of the banker guys recognized

you from one of your movies.

- Which one?

- He didn't say.

But he said he stumbled upon

one of your movies in a hotel.

He's a liar.

I never did a movie in a hotel.

- No, he saw your movie in the hotel.

- What hotel?

- How am I supposed to know?

- It is an innocent question.

Why do you make it so goddamn

hard to have a simple conversation?

How am I making it hard?

I am just sharing my point of view.

Or should I go along

with every one of your opinions?

"Yes, Bambi, no, Bambi,

whatever you say, Bambi."

You should be grateful that I try to

bring something to our discussions.

I am, but sometimes the thing

that you could bring is silence.

[WATER RUNNING]

Holly.

That sounded harsh. I'm sorry.

Are you pouting? Oh, I see.

You're bringing silence

to the discussion.

You've proven your point. You win.

Come on. You're not gonna let me

go by myself, are you?

There's two of them.

Please?

Doesn't feel so good

when I'm rhetorical, does it?

Fine. Stay.

[DOOR CLOSES]

Thanks.

I forgot I'm babysitting tonight.

- Charlotte?

- How do you know?

I told you I've been following you.

Her aunt Addie is recovering

from an accident.

Doctor has a thing for her mother,

drove her home the other night.

You have no problem carrying

on a conversation all by yourself.

May I ask you something?

I get the feeling

you're gonna ask anyway.

Why didn't you try to prove Nick

Chapel was the father of your child?

You worried about the DNA test?

No, I didn't feel like having my

name dragged in mud all year long.

You don't appreciate questioning

that begins with:

"What first attracted you

to the millionaire Nick Chapel?"

- Can I ask you something?

- Divorced, twice.

Usual complaint.

I'm married to the job.

That, and I was told I suffer from

a quasi-quixotic desire

to set the world straight.

I started as an independent

out of Cairo, Illinois,

birthplace of wife number one.

I've been moving around

ever since.

A friend roadied

for some Scottish metal act.

I fell in the rock 'n' roll crowd.

I get asked to do strange things,

including forging birth certificates

for underage groupies after the fact.

A sort of creepy request

that does little

to elevate my opinion of men.

But the hours are flexible.

There's always free beer.

In any case, I don't expect you

to absorb all this in one sitting.

- Am I making you nervous?

- Yes.

- Why? We already went to bed.

- Well, for starters,

...you're just about perfect, darling.

- Only almost.

- And I have very good taste.

- I don't like people with taste.

Girl after my own heart.

I only meant good taste in women.

- Well, in that case...

- Secondly, you teach a class.

And I've always been terribly

intimidated by teachers.

Particularly sexology teachers.

Is that even a word, "sexology"?

Oh, yeah. There's a word

for everything these days.

You teach a course

on how to act like a porn star in bed.

- That's a great title by the way.

- Thank you.

- How'd you come up with it?

- Came to me in the shower,

which is where most of my ideas

come from, which is why I'm so clean.

- You just made that up, didn't you?

- I do like the resonance of it though.

You know what I mean?

I've always liked people who can

describe the world in their own way.

Well, now you're just

blowing smoke up my ass.

An expression I never

understood entirely or wanted to.

- Still, can we do this again sometime?

- The coffee part or the other part?

- Let's start with the coffee.

- I don't know, you talk a lot.

I don't have to.

I can just sit here and not say a word.

- I thought you said you didn't lie.

- Too late to choose the other part?

I'll see you around.

Oh, what about the song?

I told you, you could pick one.

Right.

I'll take this one.

Thank you, Dellwood.

Good luck to you.

As I said, Miss Luxx, call me Dell.

Just leave me alone!

Eleanor. Goddamn it, wait.

Don't take the keys.

Why does she always

have to be so dramatic?

I'm sorry.

Nothing I ain't seen before.

- I'm Jimmy.

- I know.

- Has she said something about me?

- I've heard her crying.

[ALARM BUZZES]

What is it with me and elevators?

Power has been going

on and off all day.

- You've heard her crying?

- I'm right above you guys.

She's been talking amazing

amounts of sh*t behind my back.

But she's the one cheating on me,

you know, with her mother's gardener.

Would I make that up?

It sounds like a bad porno.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't...

No apology necessary.

I've never seen your work,

but I pass no judgment.

I can't believe this.

This is kind of like

a bad porno too, you know.

You know, like, a naked guy stuck

in an elevator with a chick who,

no offense,

is hot as balls.

- Things could be worse.

- Sure.

It could be a naked guy

who talks a lot.

I'm sorry. I...

I'm just having a...

That was so rude. You're...

You're sweet.

I followed her out to her

mom's estate a few weeks back.

I'm not proud of it,

but I get jealous.

Her mom's loaded

and they fight all day long.

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