Evolution Page #3

You remember protocol, don'tyou?

Yeah, I got some protocol right here

foryou, Russell. Come and get it.

Look, this research must continue under

careful government control and scrutiny.

We secured the area.

We're constructing an air lock into the

cavern and a field research facility.

So there's not a lot

for the science department...

ofGlen Canyon Community College

to do here.

Did you catch that condescending tone

when he says Glen Canyon Community--

We are following well-established

federal guidelines--

Ma'am, please. Russell, don't pull

this crap. We deserve to be here.

You deserve to be here?

You're lucky anybody's ever letyou

near a science laboratory again, Ira.

You're a disgrace,

and a dangerous one at that.

Lieutenant, show these men out.

This is horseshit.

It's not over.

You're in for a fight, Russell.

Would you stop following me, please?

Thankyou.

We're not gonna bend over

and take this!

Fruit basket for Russell Woodman!

Happy holidays, General!

Cute.

Dr. Kane, areyou asking me

to bar the federal government...

from involvement in a discovery

as significant as this?

No, no. We're asking you to make sure

that the local scientists...

who actually made the discovery

continue to play a significant role.

They kept us out for almost two weeks.

We put our lives on the line to find

these little guys, Your Majesty.

Wejust want to be there for them

as they grow up.

We were the first team at the site and

the initial testing was done in our lab.

The facilities at Glen Canyon Community

College are ajoke, sir.

Theyweren't ajoke

when I went there, General.

Your Honor, ifthe court

would allow me to depose Dr. Kane?

Depose me?

We thinkyour past is very relevant,

Dr. Kane.

These issues speak directly

to his competence as a scientist.

Dr. Kane, you were

a top-level researcher...

at USAMRI D from '94 to '97,

wereyou not?

Yes, that's correct.

And you were summarily dismissed

in the summer of 1 997. Any idea why?

My services were no long required?

Uh-huh. So in your opinion...

your firing had nothing to do

with an experimental anthrax vaccine...

you developed and gave to nearly 140,000

U.S. soldiers in May ofthatyear?

I see whereyou're going with this.

It may have been a factor. You'd have

to ask theJoint Chiefs ofStaff.

I'll make a note to do that.

But for now...

can you tell me what happened

to the soldiers that were inoculated?

Well, none ofthem got anthrax,

ifthat's whatyou're asking.

What did they get?

As with any new vaccine...

there were certain side effects

associated with it.

Could you be more specific?

It was a wide range ofthings.

It's very technical.

I'd hate to waste the court's time

getting into it.

Humor me.

Some debilitating stomach cramps.

Severe diarrhea.

Memory loss.

Yes, go on.

Any more symptoms?

Partial facial paralysis,

temporary blindness, drooling...

bleeding gums, erectile dysfunction,

uncontrollable fatulence.

I think that's it.

One more question.

Doyou happen to remember what the

soldiers called this illness, Dr. Kane?

Yeah, they called it

the Kane Madness.

Keepyour head up.

You know she wanted to giveyou some,

right?

Wereyou even in that courtroom?

Getting barbecued like baby back ribs?

It's all foreplay, baby.

Oh, we've been hit.

Forget the foreplay.

Wejust got screwed.

- Empty.

- This is very, very bad.

Damn it!

I don't care who they are.

Stealing is stealing.

Perfect.

They took the rock, the samples,

all the little wormy critters.

All the data's gone. TheJ PEG files,

the DNA sequences. They cleaned us out.

- I'm calling the cops.

- The cops?

They are the cops!

Then what?

Let me askyou, how comeyou get

to be a colonel and I'm just a private?

I was a colonel.

And you obviously served

your countrywith distinction.

Consideryourselflucky. The penalty

for impersonating an officer is prison.

Yeah, maybe for you, white boy.

Me, they hang.

Colonels first.

I was at it for 12 hours.

My toes were starting to hurt

I was standing so long.

Stop it.

-Just act likeyou belong.

- Don't worry, I got this.

- Pick up that butt, soldier.

- Sorry, sir.

- And tuck that shirt in.

- Yes, sir.

Get the door.

Thankyou, Private.

Don't get used to this.

Oh-oh, look at that.

Enjoyyour lunch, gentlemen.

Okay, I'll be right back.

Your girlfriend, 1 1 :00.

Darn it.

That woman's a menace.

Testing, one, two. One, two.

One, one, one, two.

This is D.J. Harry Block here,

and I'm an Aquarius.

Will you stop?

I can hearyou.

Don'tyou snap at me, unless you want an

angry Solid Gold dancer on your hands.

Lieutenant?

Yeah?

Who's that?

I don't know.

I don't have anything on my schedule.

Maybe it's the guys from sector 1 2

doing a nocturnal specimen run.

- You know how those guys are.

- Oh, yeah.

This place has changed.

Can you believe this?

Look at that.

Our little babies are growing up.

Three weeks, it's already

like a rain forest in here.

Looks like the kitchen

from my first apartment.

Harry, check that guy out.

Is it coming or going?

That treejust ate it.

Everything here seems to be food

for something else.

- So stay offthe menu, huh?

- You got that right.

Ira, come here,

look at these little things.

Cool. Hey, snag one.

- Snag one?

- Snag one and put him in the bucket.

I seen this movie.

The black dude dies first. You snag it.

Don't be scared. We came

for a specimen, now snag one.

He's not gonna hurtyou.

He's turned the otherway.

He's eating.

Come on, my little red lobster.

Come on, my sexy little crustacean.

Come on.

Whoa!

Ira, look at that backside.

Theater in the round.

That's the kind oftrunk space

you want in a late model car.

Who does that remind you of?

I have no idea

whatyou're talking about.

She's been throwing it atyou enough.

- Dr. Reed?

- Bull's-eye.

Excuse me, Dr. Reed?

Did you authorize a walk-through?

Nope. Why?

You should probably take a look

at something. Here.

You'd like to roast that rump.

You'd like to butter that mother.

That is an ice image.

And Iappreciate your assumption...

that there is anactual

sexualhumanbeing...

underneathall Dr. Reed's

deep-seatedneuroses.

- ButIdon't thinkso.

- What?

I thinksheis

ahumorless ice queen.

Ira, that'sjusta cover.

Don'tyouknowthat?

Allsheneeds isagoodhumping.

Oh, Ira. Ira!

Harry, stop that. We got tagetapiece

of the asteroid like we came for.

And cut that out.

It disturbs me.

- Ira!

- Don'tdo that behind my back.

- I'm not doing it. I'm just walking.

- Cut it out.

Let's bag that

and get the hell out ofhere.

I'm readywhen you are, Colonel.

This disco suit is making me chafe.

Shoo, fy.

Hold it right there.

Dr. Reed, so nice to seeyou again.

We werejust leaving.

You're in violation ofthejudge's

orders. I could haveyou arrested.

Want to talk about violations?

What about our lab?

- Got any Raid?

- What areyou talking about?

You stole our computer hard drive,

samples, files. Everything.

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