Flock of Dudes Page #3

a place for them.

Sorry.

- It's really inappropriate.

All right.

You smell so good.

You guys thirsty?

Hmm?

Everybody, I need your

attention up here to the stage.

Everyone, look at me.

All right!

How much do we love Halloween?

All right!

And the winner is

the Ghostbusters!

Hey.

Hey, how are you?

You guys were

robbed, by the way.

I know, yeah.

What made you guys decide

to be a group of turds?

Well, we were supposed

to California Raisins,

and you know that.

Yeah, I know.

That's actually pretty cool.

I haven't had a group

costume since college.

Smile.

Uh, cat and cat sh*t?

I guess you can't

say that anymore, huh?

Guess not.

Hey.

Oh, hey!

Hey.

Hey, you made it.

Um, Justin, Adam.

Adam, Justin.

I... I work with Adam.

Oh.

Hey, Adam.

Hey.

It's nice to meet you.

Yeah, nice to meet you too, man.

Uh, what'd you come as?

Oh, uh...

Oh, he just... he came

straight from work.

Hey, you look thirsty.

What are you drinking?

Uh, I don't know.

Let's get this party started.

We'll do some Jagerbombs, huh?

Jagerbombs.

All right, you're

really taking me back.

I mean, while we're

at it, why don't we

get some Long Island Iced Teas?

Uh, you guys are joking.

Obviously you're kidding.

Yeah, I get it.

Uh, listen, um, just

order me whatever.

I'll be right back.

Excuse me.

Hey, Ro.

What's going on?

I'm trying to have

a conversation.

You interrupted me.

Yeah, with the girl

and her boyfriend

who's like a grown man.

Look, look, look, that doesn't

even matter right now, OK?

What matters is is that Barrett

is talking sh*t to those hack

Ghostbusters over there.

It's about to get ugly, dude.

I ain't afraid

of no ghosts, man!

Oh, sh*t.

Oh, it's on!

OK, man.

You got Egon.

Wait.

Which one's Egon?

The black one?

No!

All right, sorry.

Um, it's even numbers, so

I'm gonna sit this one out.

Right here!

Right here!

Wait.

What?

- Your mustache.

- OK.

OK.

Adam, Adam, OK.

There are two horny

devils over there.

I'm gonna need you

to be my wingman.

Hey, hold on.

I want to go to talk Beth.

Wingman, dude!

What are you dressed... as some

kind of old-timey prostitute?

Unless you are a

modern prostitute.

Compliment!

Wait, Mook, no, don't.

Don't, Mook.

After-party our place!

South Central

does it like nobody does.

This is how we do it.

Something, something.

So it's 3:
00 in the morning,

and you're at our house,

and you have a boyfriend.

Thanks for not

opening with that.

Gabrus, you smell like herb.

Gotta get your groove on.

Did you see that thing?

Howie.

Hey, hey, it's my landlord.

You're out.

Why do you like me?

Why don't you just like me?

I mean, this is

honestly an enormous shocker.

And I haven't received rent.

This is the third time

I've been here this month.

Your move.

You know, man.

I mean, what is this?

That's it.

I'm done.

OK, the bad news is,

that was the landlord.

Barrett didn't mail our rent.

So we're evicted.

But, uh, the good news is, we

ain't got nothing left to lose!

Crank up the music, Mooker!

Let's f***ing go!

Go!

Go!

Go!

Yeah!

Whoa.

What's going on?

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Where are you going?

I'm f***ing out of here, dude.

No, no.

You were in with the toad.

You've done so

much worse before.

Come on.

- Not tonight, dude.

Come on.

What's the matter?

Nothing's the matter, dude.

I'm just not f***ing

feeling it, all right?

I'm just... I'm... I'm done

wasting time, all right?

Wasting what?

What?

Man, we're always

living like this,

like we're still living

like we're in college.

What's wrong with college?

Listen to me, man.

We're getting evicted, dude.

And my brother's

getting married.

My boss thinks I'm a pervert.

Newsflash... he's kinda right.

Should I call my

girlfriend for some device?

Oh, no, I can't do

that, because she's

dating a superstar celebrity.

And guess what I am?

A California Raisin.

Hey, we are all raisins, baby!

Yeah, we are all raisins.

Raisins for life.

You're not supposed

to be happy about that

is my whole point, is that

we're all raisins, and great.

That's not a good f***ing thing.

We live every day, and every

day is always the same,

day in and day out, right?

We're going to bars.

We get into bar fights.

We go into karaokes.

We do karaoke sings, OK?

I work for lacrosse, dude.

And that's not cool.

It was supposed to be a stepping

stone, but now it's my career.

I... I try to meet a girl.

I can't do that, OK?

What about the girl that

works in my office, Beth?

She doesn't want to go out

with a guy who can't put

on his shoulders.

She doesn't want to go

out with a guy who doesn't

have a nice watch collection.

I have one watch.

It's rubber and it's orange.

And I don't even know

where it is, dude.

I have no dentist, OK?

I don't know how to

open a bottle of wine.

I try to open up

a bottle of wine.

Every time I try to

open a bottle of wine,

the cork goes in the wine.

And I'm always like,

who gives a sh*t?

I'll... I'll drink

this sh*t anyway.

And...

What the f***

are you talking about?

I'll tell you right now.

I... I f***ing have a

cork inside me right now.

And I'm gonna... and right now

is the moment where I'm going

to start to give a sh*t.

Because I don't... I'm not going

to have a cork in me anymore,

and I'm done.

Wait, are you breaking

up with us, dude?

Yeah, I think I... I think I

am breaking up with you guys.

Because we could

use some time apart.

Wow.

You son of a b*tch!

All right, dude.

What?

You're drunk.

You don't want to say something

right now that you're not

going to be able to take back.

Hey, you know what?

I'm done with this.

I'm done with totes.

I'm done with "This Is How

We Do It," MONTELL Jordan.

Oh, no, no.

You leave MONTELL out of this.

Shots fired.

Don't you dare.

- That is not good.

- Don't you f***ing dare, Adam.

That is not good.

OK, so you're just

going to walk away

after all the

laughs we've had and

after everything I sacrificed.

You're just going to walk away.

Oh, you sacrifice it?

Yeah, yeah, I sacrifice.

I don't have a f***ing

dentist either, man.

My teeth hurt like sh*t!

That's my whole point.

It's over.

You're over!

It's over!

So, uh, listen.

I, um... I want to

apologize about last night.

I know I said some...

Heh... harsh things.

But I just wanted

to say I'm sorry.

Well, I accept your apology.

Consider every word

you said taken back.

That's actually the thing

about that, is that, um,

there were parts that I... I

do still kind of agree with,

and one of them being

that I think maybe we

spend too much time together.

And, uh, we should break up.

Adam's just not that into us.

No, dude.

Look.

Have any of us changed at all

since we've met each other?

Yes!

Howie's fatter now.

Significantly fatter.

Yeah, I did it on purpose.

OK, can I weigh in

here for a second?

Jesus.

Howie, you've never

been promoted ever.

Well, I don't think my job

really does that sort of thing.

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