Fonzy Page #3

Synopsis: A fish deliveryman in Paris becomes involved in a legal battle with his sperm donation children.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Isabelle Doval
Production: DistriB Films
 
IMDB:
5.0
Metacritic:
55
Rotten Tomatoes:
67%
Year:
2013
103 min
Website
39 Views


You don't deliver fish,

you keep it. Very handy.

I keep the fish,

don't touch it, it's mine.

It's mine, it's my fish.

Go ahead,I'm sorry.

Tea for me, handsome.

Coffee, please.

Yes, all right.

- Apple brandy!

- One?

Two? Three apple brandies.

Coffee or apple brandy?

Two coffees?

Stay at the bar, sir.

What'll you have?

A snappy explanation.

I'm the barman.

You're not, I'm the boss.

Let me explain.

Hugo had a big audition.

He can look for work.

Show some sympathy,

it's his big break.

- I am sympathetic.

- So?

He's no good, he's just no good.

They never pick him.

He's no good.

He fails every audition.

He's always saying it's his big break.

He's a good kid

but he's got it all wrong.

It's my fault. I told him to go

and lent him my van.

So tell him

he's no longer a barman

and lost his income

because of you.

What's wrong?

I lost my job, is that it?

Yeah.

- I got the part.

- You did?

I got the Pa"-

Thank you, I got it.

Awesome!

Here.

I had a revelation.

I can't be a father to 533 kids,

it's impossible.

It's impossible being a father to four.

But...

I can be their guardian angel.

Their guardian angel?

They need me to watch over them.

They need a guardian angel.

As their biological father,

that's my responsibility.

So you're saying

that your mission on earth

is to be a superhero for 533 kids?

Not a superhero.

When you watch over your kids,

do you wear Lycra?

Not a superhero, a guardian angel!

OK, sorry, no Lycra.

So you have wings and play a harp.

Know what, Diego?

Menial alienation is the way to go.

I don't suffer from mental alienation!

- Again.

- I don't... Read my lips!

I don't suffer from mental alienation!

When we're in court

say it exactly that same way.

I haven't slept for four days,

I've never been so happy.

I never thought

I could love someone so much.

Each dirty diaper blows me away.

He poops four times a day

and four times a day, I tell myself

'He does the world's best poops'.

That's so touching.

Your brother wants parental leave

so he can admire his son's diapers.

He does beautiful poops, see.

Parental leave is a legal fight.

If it's a legal right...

I had three kids

and two hours after they were born,

I was here serving fish.

Maybe that's why

they don't recognise you.

Diego was the most sheltered

of the three of us.

Look at the state he...

Maybe, but he's the one

Dad made the most of.

See how close they are now.

Time together

creates a quality relationship.

And you can't get back lost time.

Time is money anyhow

so make an effort.

You have to have kids, Diego.

Hows it going?

It's my first ultrasound today.

Cool...

- I need a friend, not a father.

- I am your friend.

I want things to be clear.

Crystal clear.

Move it, I drank a litre of water

and can't pee until it's over.

Want to know its sex?

I'll ask for a girl.

- What if they've run out?

- I want a girl!

OK, it'll be a girl.

Those are the feet. You see them?

Look.

Can you see them?

You can see the feet

nice and clearly.

That's a cross-section of the stomach.

It's perfect.

I can't see a thing.

It's the emotion,

we're very sensitive.

Bullshit! It's not that.

This thing isn't clear.

It's like a map,

I can't get my bearings.

Never mind, I have a GPS unit.

Look.

Look here, this is the head.

Can you see the head?

- You can't see it?

- I can't see a thing.

Cut it out!

I came and sat here for hours yesterday.

You did?

It's a nightmare.

They don't listen.

I like order, I like discipline.

What'll I do

with a kid who won't listen?

- I think you may be a bit up-tight.

- I'm not!

I am?

A bit.

I've been watching that one

10 seconds

and I feel like cuffing him.

Elsa, I...

This is the best thing

that could happen to us.

You think so?

I think you'll be a good mother.

Really?

A mother...

who's attentive and gentle.

You think so?

Since I don't trust you one bit

I'll declare you the father...

- You will?

- Hold on.

On probation.

Father on probation?

Or a trial father if you prefer.

You've no room for manoeuvre.

And will our child have to call me

'Dad on probation'?

No.

And will I be obliged to wear

a uniform different from normal dads?

I'm tempted...

Don't get carried away.

Let's go!

This sh*t will never pay us!

I'll kill you!

Sh*t, they're full of weed!

Mouss, take the bags!

Sh*t...

We hit the jackpot!

How does Nathan know you?

I'm a family friend, his godfather.

OK.

They're great kids.

- Looking for Nathan?

- Yes.

He's in another wing.

Kevin will take you.

Will you lake the gentleman?

Go on.

- I go with him?

- Yes.

- On my own?

- Yes, on your own.

Here's Nathan.

Thank you.

Going already?

Slay.

His family doesn't visit often,

he's very lonely.

No, I think I'll be going...

Just go and talk to him.

Just talk to him.

You did that well.

- I'm sorry?

- You did that very well.

After the legal report

you'll have the opportunity

to ask questions.

But you may intervene at any point,

it's not a problem.

You may feel

like sharing something,

anything to do with the proceedings

if you want to change things

or improve others...

If there are things that don't suit you

or that you don't feel comfortable with.

We can talk about it.

So I'd really like you all

to give your opinion.

It will help us move ahead

in the same direction

and make the suit as precise as possible.

Marie, you want to speak?

Yes, I wanted to tell you all

I feel like a painting,

half color, half black and white.

I'd like to complete the painting.

So I can grow up, thrive

and know my biological father.

Even if he's a maniac,

even if he's totally nuts.

I need that.

Thank you.

Bertrand, go ahead.

I'm in love with a girl,

an AID kid like me

and we want to have a baby.

Hearing we may have the same donor,

making us half-siblings,

that cast a chill.

We don't touch now.

My parents say

they had me out of love but sorry.

They may well love each other

but I don't owe them life.

I'm really happy to see the group

Getting bigger.

Whatever the judge decides

we'll have gotten to know each other.

It's awesome to think

we're all brothers and sisters.

Franck'?

What are you doing here?

How are you?

Actually, I'm the father of Nathan.

He can't be here, he's in a home,

he's handicapped.

OK.

Hello! Fancy seeing you here!

Sybille, this is Marcus.

- Franck'?

- Hugo!

How are you?

What are you doing here?

This is Marcus.

He's a tourist guide.

Sybille, a pizza sweepstakes winner.

Hugo works in a bar near my place.

I'm the father of Nathan.

He's in a home for the handicapped.

- You're a father?

- Adoptive.

Hugo worked in a bar near my place

but he's an actor, a great actor.

Yannick taught me to parachute.

Hugo worked in a bar near my place

but he's an actor.

Sybille wins pizza sweepstakes.

Shall we go?

Mum, Franck got me to that audition.

Delighted to meet you.

My mum.

That's great.

I'll leave you to get acquainted.

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Isabelle Doval

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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