Fonzy Page #5

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That's not a joke.

I'm threatening you, OK?

Come on.

What's this mess, Xavier?

What's going on?

Are you OK?

Not too tired after a long day?

I am.

I made you a sandwich

but maybe you ate already.

No.

Elsa left a message

on the answering machine.

Your cell's in her purse.

She thanks you

for a lovely lunch with the family.

You were asleep.

I didn't want to disturb you...

Why do you lie all the time?

Xavier, I've spent

a lot of time with you lately.

I also have friends and a real family.

A real family?

My family, yes.

You're ruling out

that part of your life

but we won't disappear!

We exist for real.

Like it or not,

we're part of you.

And so of 'your' family!

- OK, I'm a jerk.

- Worse, you're a fink.

- What's a fink?

- A traitor!

How can I make up for this?

Next week,

keep the whole Sunday free.

- What for?

- A surprise.

Hold on, I have Elsa, my job,

my business...

OK, I'm not going to quibble.

- It's miles!

- Quit bitching.

I hope you're happy-

Because of you, I had to lie to Elsa.

I lied to the woman carrying my child.

Ah, OK...

You're doing the introductions today?

No, I want to keep you to myself.

You've tried it three times already...

I've govt m

I 90k it autographed.

Who wants a sandwich?

OK?

T-shirts!

Hi there!

Hows it going?

How about Dad's little kisses?

Off to school? Have a good day.

You're off to school!

Come on, give me five!

Hows it going?

Coffee, croissants, bread?

Give me a coffee.

Busy weekend?

Nothing special.

I watched 'Star Wars'.

Which one?

The first one.

Of course.

Lying to your woman is normal.

Lies are the basis

of a stable relationship.

But I'm net your woman.

So before saying you spent the weekend

with Obi-Wan Kenobi,

Darth Vador or Yoda,

take a look at this.

FONZY'S KIDS:

THE FRATERNAL UNION

The reporter is selling her story

to Paris Match,

The Times, CNN and TF1.

By this evening, around

five billion people will be wondering

who the hell Fonzy is.

Is that good for the case?

Can we still control the situation?

The answer is yes.

We go on the offensive.

We sue the clinic too.

- For what?

- Misuse of your donations.

Imagine the impact on your private life.

- You don't know what they're saying.

- What?

Horrible stuff!

But that's good for us.

We have the hearing against the group.

I suggest launching a separate action

to sue the clinic for fraud.

And demand damages.

That way, you can pay off your debts

in no time.

I give up my children

to pay my debts?

What's up? You corrected me yourself

when I gave you the file.

These kids

nearly all have fathers who held them

as babies.

You're their genitor.

I'll say I'm Fonzy.

No, stay undercover.

It's my decision. I'm your client.

No, you're not paying me!

Think about it.

If you come clean

we won't be able to sue.

And no suit means no cash.

But they're my kids.

Your kids will be proud of you.

Fonzy is the jerk-off king.

He's a pervert.

All Fonzy did

was give his sperm for research!

Ha was young and never expected to father 533 kids!

The poor guy was tricked.

Fonzy didn't donate sperm, he sold it.

He needs to talk!

How can someone make a living

through masturbation?

More than 600 times!

- If I were him, I'd stay incognito.

- Why?

The world sees him

as the jerk-off king!

Cut 1'1!' out.

The English call him Sperm Man

and the Spanish El Masturbator!

Stop it!

He's a pervert.

Sorry, I don't get it.

What do you think

of this Fonzy business?

He can't be normal.

What was the guy thinking?

Maybe he thought he'd help research.

By having 533 kids?

You'll call him a hero soon.

- He's a pervert.

- No, he isn't.

A sperm-seller is a pervert, Diego!

Excuse me...

Hello. Can I help you?

Would you happen to have a stroller

for 533 kids?

No, we won't have that.

Of course!

It's not normal to have 533 kids.

A woman can't

so neither can a man!

He can.

Screw you!

Good luck.

I beat the meat for nothing.

If I get a nice room for it.

I'm ready anytime.

Hold on...

Fonzy got 15 euros a shot.

Good deal.

He'll never say who he is

or he'll be Sperm Man forever.

Who's given sperm?

I haven't.

I bet you've given yours, Diego.

No.

You were a jack-off ace.

- Cut it out, Enrique!

- He's kidding.

Just drop it.

- Are you OK?

- Yeah.

Sony to put you through that.

I had much worse during my childhood.

I never wanted to hurt anyone

but it seems that's all I do.

Well, I'm happy to be your son.

That's kind.

I hoped for a decent guy like you.

That sounds like a goodbye.

I'm crashing with Thomas,

my half-brother.

One of your kids, so a decent guy.

- Watch my hair!

- Sony.

How did you pay for Mum's trip?

- Hows it going, baby?

- I'm OK.

I had something to tell you...

- Feel that?

- The baby?

Of course it's the baby.

He's moving?

I want to make love.

- Let's make love.

- Stop it!

I want to make love!

No, he's moving!

I don't want to!

- What's up?

- Where were you?

At Elsa's. Why?

Dad?

Some Asians tried to drown him

in his tub.

They want their 50 grand.

I've seen all the banks.

Know what a night dunking

can do to a 70-year-old man?

Some Asians nearly drowned our dad!

You've gone too far.

We gave them five grand

to calm them down

but you have to find the money.

Dad...

I just heard...

I'm so sorry.

Forgive me, Dad.

Dieg, what brings you?

Go ahead with the subpoena.

Excellent.

If we prove

the damage you've been done...

Knowledge of one's genetic origins

must be viewed as a human right.

We contest these laws

that forget children.

People talk of genetic heritage

but my parents and I don't know mine.

Our parents never expected us

to make this demand.

They Support us now.

They realise we need to know

who gave us life.

We've all heard

of so-called equality for all.

All, except children.

It's as if we had no right

to our origins.

Science calls me an 'AID child'

but I just want to be an ordinary child.

I too want to know the truth

about my origins...

Your Honour,

I represent

the interests of the plaintiff

who has faced...

I'll turn in the robes.

...considerable pressure

for months now

from the Valle Clinic.

My client and the Valle Clinic

signed an agreement

for genetic research

via a number of sperm donations.

For a while now,

you've been doing

these sweeping movements

but keep it simple.

You're an attorney?

I'm just saying...

Yet!

That's important.

...considerable pressure

has been brought to bear

on my client.

We have therefore tried to prove

that this situation

represents

deliberate fraud

in relation to my client.

This has caused him

considerable personal harm

for which he is now

seeking compensation

by the awarding of damages.

- Everything OK?

- And you?

How did it go?

Listen...

Great.

You think it looks good?

Yeah, it's...

I said everything.

It went well.

Yeah?

The court.

Please be seated.

After hearing both sides' arguments,

the Court rules that Fonzy

has a full and unequivocal right

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