Ghost Team One Page #7

What the f***, guys? Come on!

- Do you not knock?

- Oh, my God! That was so insane!

That was awesome what you did!

- And you!

- Can you...

You're the man! He did... I mean...

Hey!

Let's just look at me for,

like, five seconds.

Just give me five seconds

of your f***ing time,

that's all I'm asking for. Stop it!

I am done with this sh*t!

I just realized,

I had an insight to my f***ing self,

I am not the guy

that comes with friends involved.

And, Fernanda,

you're hot, and you're f***ing sexy

and all that great stuff,

but I can't take it anymore!

- But the ghost liked it!

- No! Hey!

I don't give a sh*t about the ghost!

- I mean, did you see that?

- Because you know what?

I'm doing sh*t

that I've never done in my life

and you guys

don't give a crap about me!

You are beautiful

and you're f***ing nuts

and that's perfect,

because for a second,

for a f***ing second

I thought I could hunt,

I could f***ing roll with you, okay?

But I'm not, okay?

And this is the f***ing proof.

I'm sorry, but you're gonna

have to choose somebody.

- Listen...

- I'm done, I'm done, I'm done,

I'm done putting

all my energies into this project.

- Guys...

- And I'm putting... I'm done just putting

all my energies into you,

so choose one, choose now,

I cannot compete,

I am not built for this sh*t,

so please, just choose somebody!

Serge, I...

I can't choose.

I'm sorry, you don't have a choice.

You have to choose.

I have a boyfriend.

Of course, you f***ing do.

Everybody, Billy Chen, he's got...

Of course, you're gonna

have a boyfriend. I just...

'Cause when I thought that

coming in my pants would be the twist,

it's not the f***ing twist,

this is the twist!

So go on.

You have a boyfriend!

Let's talk about the f***ing...

Is this a test? Because if you need to

a have a boyfriend to choose me,

- like, that's fine, I don't care...

- You know what? That's...

- I'm sorry, I can't.

- Could you please relax?

Serge, just take five minutes, bro.

You'll get it up again.

- Serge!

- Serge!

I didn't wanna hurt you!

I think we should

just keep going, don't you think?

I think we should definitely, like...

What's wrong with you? Stop it!

- I'm gonna go home.

- For the ghost!

- Don't follow me, you stalker.

- I'm not...

What? You came to our house.

You jerk.

I didn't mean that.

I got to f***ing nut

in my pants to get the chick?

Is that what it is?

Serge?

Fernanda?

Guys?

Billy.

Billy.

Billy.

Billy.

Billy.

Hey, do you want

to go to a titty bar, Serge?

- No, man.

- Come on, man,

let's get the f*** out of the house.

Let's go to the titty bar.

Dude, I don't wanna

go to a titty bar right now.

Come on. It's Iraqi Week.

Let's just go.

They... I think they've got a buffet.

Check online.

You could get

some roast beef soup or something.

Why don't you go

look at titties yourself, man?

You've had some time.

I don't wanna go alone, okay?

I wanna be with my friend.

You're the only... Who am I gonna ask?

Chuck? To go to a f***ing titty bar?

- Get up, let's go.

- Hey.

- F***ing let's go outside.

- Hey, hey.

- You know what "no" means?

- F*** Fernanda!

Dude, it's not just Fernanda, okay?

No, it is. F*** her, all right?

- Yeah, but then there's no movie...

- She just f***ed with us.

And I was kind of...

What do you mean?

There is a movie. Look at f***ing Billy,

he's still here. There's no movie?

What the f*** has Billy been doing?

Recording me

sitting down like an a**hole.

What the f*** is wrong with you, man?

You're the one that got me in this sh*t.

I didn't wanna f***ing do it

and now I'm f***ing excited about it.

I f***ed a ghost.

Has that ever happened before?

What did we learn

from f***ing Fernanda?

It likes to be around sexual situations.

It likes to be around sexual...

Are you getting this, Billy?

Of course, you are.

That's why I f***ing love you.

Let's do that then.

Let's show her that we want her.

Maybe she'll come out or something.

I'm willing to sacrifice my dick

for your f***ing project, man.

You think f***ing Kobe Bryant

wants to wake up

every morning at 5:00

and shoot 500 free throws?

No, he doesn't, but he does,

'cause that's what he was born to do.

- Really?

- That's why he's making the money.

I was born to f***.

So you're saying

you're the Kobe Bryant of ghost-f***ing?

If that's the title

you wanna give me, Serge.

I didn't give you the title.

You kind ofjust did by saying that.

Let's do it, get the footage,

f***ing do your sh*t

with the f***ing editing

and put it together,

make millions. Millionaire. Yes?

Please? We're Ghost Team One.

Ghost Team One because

apparently there is more than one.

No, because f***ing

"Ghost Team" is stupid, okay?

We're Ghost Team One.

Can you please say it?

Please? Just once?

Okay. Let's take this seriously, then.

Ready?

One, two, three...

- Ghost Team...

- We're gonna masturbate.

Billy, you're in on this or what?

You're in the crew? Jack off crew?

Yeah! I love it, Billy.

You need this. Let's go.

We got a Lady Azalea, bon apptit,

all-you-can-eat

p*ssy buffet, baby, right here.

We got d*ldos to my left

because even when

I'm focused on all these pictures,

I need the peripheral.

So it's like vagina, vagina, vagina,

and then dildo that goes into the vagina.

We got some girl-on-girl, double-P.

We got some ass-licking.

Hey, man.

I'm in the middle

of something, bro.

- I'm in the middle of something.

- I can see that.

I just wanted to let you know that

I don't have a lock on my door,

so just play it cool, okay?

Listen, you need some Vaseline,

some f***ing baby oil?

Rub your dick up.

I want it hard as a f***ing nail gun!

No, that's the opposite

of what I'm trying to tell you.

I don't want any more

Y tu mam tambin moments, okay?

- You got it. You got it.

- Got it, Billy? All right.

Okay. Take some porn

before you go. Take some.

- No, I probably shouldn't...

- No, no. Please, come on.

Take that one, take that one too.

Take those. You need it.

We need to get this baby up and going,

perk that b*tch up.

Take off your pants,

you don't even need pants anymore.

- All right, I'll take this one.

- Take them off.

- Take off your shirt, take off your shoes.

- I'll take this one.

- Can I take both?

- You need some more?

- Take some more?

- Take that one right there, too.

- No, this is fine.

- Are you sure?

All right, just don't whisper...

- Don't whisper at my door please.

- Okay.

Cock nunchucks. Cochunchucks!

I'm psyched.

Not freaking out.

Yeah, looking great.

You know, not scared at all,

just ready to rock 'n' roll.

Yeah, rock out with our c*cks out.

Let's do it, guys. Ghost Team One!

Lady Azalea

isn't into this sh*t.

This didn't work.

I'm kind of relieved because

I don't wanna f*** a ghost.

I don't, it wasn't fun.

Who would wanna f*** a ghost?

That was stupid.

I just want everything

to go back to normal.

You don't scare me, b*tch! You don't!

Sergio! I just want Sergio to come.

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