Guest iin London Page #8

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are alive are farting. Wow.. that's unbelievable. Mr. Mehta,

I've written a few lines on fan. That's amazing..so

what are you waiting for? Not like this. Such gatherings are

pointless without alcohol. Uncle, you're absolutely right. We all need a drink.- Yeah.. Guddi.

- Yeah. Get the duty-free bottle. And Kake.. I'll get some cucumbers,

tomatoes, and carrots for you. Cottage cheese"

Fritters and munchies. I'll get everything, uncle. Who will get the glasses, you fool? What? Who am I? Am I the maid? Daughter-i n-law. . slice some carrots. Daughter-i n-law. . slice some radish. I would slice them instead. Get some fritters. Can we get some cottage cheese?

How about some munchies? I hate this daughter-in-law and Kake. In Punjab,

sons are addressed as Kake.. ...and his wife as daughter-in-law. I am not their daughter-in-law. Daughter-in-law.

- Coming. "Sometimes it's loud,

and sometimes it's without a sound." "Sometimes it's loud,

and sometimes it's without a sound." "Every fan has its own unique style." 'Allah!' "Sometimes it's like a breeze

and sometimes like a blast." "Sometimes it's behind closed doors." "..and sometimes it

happens out in the open." It does..it does"

It often happens like that. "Sometimes silent..sometimes violent." "When a stunning lady farts,

it smells like roses." This one's for you, dear.

- For me? "When a stunning lady farts,

it smells like roses." "My fan makes people comatose." "When you fan, it smells rose." "When she farts..brain close." "It isn't just me..the

entire world's farting." "It isn't just me..the

entire world's farting." "People have always

been free to fart." "Pappu's farting..and so is Tommy." "Somewhere entire sect's farting while

somewhere a commie's farting too." "There's no tax on fan,

everyone's farting tax-free." "Somewhere an entire nation farting." "America farted on Iraq,

and Osama farted back on America." "And ruined many homes and families." "And Pakistan keeps

farting all the time." "Keeps secretly farting all the time." "Everyone else' grief's come later,

because our own people fan the most." "When stars fan, it gets retweeted." "They even get likes.

- They even get likes." "Politicians get a mike to fart." "They get a mike. They get a mike." "My fan only burns

the hair in your noses." "..but their fan pierces

right through your soul." 'Allah.' "Fart has." "Fart has blown away

the fragrance in relations." Amazing. "Fart has blown away the

fragrance in relations. - Wow.." "Because fathers are

getting born after the sons." Wow. . Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Uncle, you're really amazing. Where's Mr. Mehta? Mr. Mehta" Mr. Mehta passed away. Passed away? He died. When did this happen?

- He suffered an attack late last night. And didn't make it. The maid told us when she

arrived in the morning and saw him. His children are in Wembley. This is unbelievable. 'Mr. Mehta, don't laugh so loud. 'Uncle..l want to die laughing.' 'So what's the problem.. Laugh aloud.' 'Hey..

- Laugh aloud.' Where are you taking him? Get a casket"

We'll give him a proper funeral. Look at Mr. Mehta. He's still smiling. Like he got a heart

attack while hearing a joke. Excuse me, we're getting late. Mr. Mehta isn't going anywhere so,

what is he getting late for? He's dead. But we've to go..to office. And you are.. He's Mr. Mehta's beloved son. And his grandson,

the apple of his eye. And he's his great-grandson,

completely unaware. But if you go to the office who

will give him perform the final rites. We can pay- We've fixed his final

rites for Saturday. Saturday. 5 days later.

- Yes. He's busy. Out here,

funerals are normally on weekends. It's your father's final rites. Not some picnic which

you can go for on a weekend. What's the point of taking an off? What's the point? Tell me something. If you ever fell sick

when you were a kid.. ...l am sure Mr. Mehta

took an off from work. Didn't he? So it's your father's final rites. Can't you take a

one day off from work? Manish.

- Yes, dad. Send the ambulance back. We'll perform the final rites today.

- Yes, dad. That's more like it. Just like you're giving

your father a proper funeral.. ...l pray that your son performs

your final rites on a weekday. What? - He's trying to

say that you're a great guy. Mr. Mehta was the great guy. Bony. Yes, uncle.

- Come here.. Arrange for a band. We'll send him away in an airplane. [English rap song] "Have a feast." "..and drink until you drop." "You don't need to worry..and

dance your sorrows away." "Don't worry about your next meal." "About your next meal.." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You were born empty-handed

and you'll die the same way." "Everyone knows." "Forget everything else"

and take God's name." "He's the only truth." "His divine plays are unique.." "..what kind of life is this." "What is this race.." "..where you never

listen to yourself." "Your eyes are covered with sorrows." "And forget your kin." "Don't worry..about answering calls." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." "You'll leave this

world behind someday." What happened? What happened?

- What are you doing? Mr. Mehta passed away.

We're taking him to the crematorium. Dancing like this. You need permission for this. Permission. What the hell is this? It's Mr. Mehta's..airplane. What does that mean? Plane. Aircraft. Have you got a license

to fly this aircraft, sir? She's asking whether you

have a license to fly this plane. I don't even have a scooter's license. He doesn't. Arrest everybody. Dead body, not everybody. Uncle dearest,

they can arrest anybody. But dead body is nobody. Arrest them. It's enough. First, you lost your job. Next, you end up in a police station. Plus, a 500-pound penalty. 500 pounds. Aunt's always sleepwalking

into our room. Uncle is celebrating neighbor's

birthday in our home. He has a song on fan. Fart..Aryan. It was a poem. Doesn't matter..it

still smells the same. This is what happens in Punjab. Hello, Flying Punjab. I mean why does he

have to do all this? I think he's loving this.

- Exactly! He's loving this. But we're not loving this. There's no point in

sitting and worrying, Aryan. Send them back. Exactly what I am thinking,

what should I do? How do I send them back? We must think of a plan..then

put it into action. "My name Sheila.." "Sheila's killer youth.." "I am too sexy for you.." "..you can't lay your hands on me." "My name Sheila.." "Sheila's killer youth.." Aryan! I have an idea.

- What? "L know you want it

but you never gonna get it." "You can never lay hands on me." "Believe it or not but the whole

world's crazy about me." "I feel like slowing

caressing myself." "I don't need anyone else

when I can love myself." "What's my name?" "What's my name?" "What's my name?" "My name Sheila.." "Sheila's killer youth.." "I am too sexy for you.." "..you can't lay your hands on me." "No, no no Sheila.." I guess I'm in the wrong home. "L am too sexy for you.." Anaya. That sounds like Kake.

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